Married, with Friends

hedges

I recently came upon a book called Hedges: Loving Your Marriage Enough to Protect It, by Christian author Jerry B. Jenkins. With the divorce rate steadily climbing and infidelity creeping into even the happiest marriages, in a society that trivializes adultery and its devastating effects, with temptation and opportunity coming at you from all directions - how can you keep your marriage from becoming a statistic?The advice from best-selling author Jerry B. Jenkins is this: plant preventative … [Read more...]

My Brothers and My Mother

Mother Boys

When my brothers were about ten or twelve, my parents began to say that they were "chafing at being under the authority of a woman." By this they meant that my brothers didn't like having to obey my mom, because, of course, they were becoming men. And, well, men don't like being under female authority. Or at least, that's what they said. And to this day, if you asked my mother, she would tell you that all of her boys have "chafed under her authority" while none of her girls have done so. She … [Read more...]

Jane Austen, Mr. Collins, and Rape Culture

Collins Bennet

What we call "rape culture" is nothing new, and its roots go deep. The "no means no" campaign on first glance seems to be too obvious to need saying. Except that it's unfortunately not. This statement is probably the one thing from the whole Nice Guys of OK Cupid thing that stuck with me the most: A No is just a Yes that needs a little convincing! To be honest, this is frightening to me. And maddening. The idea that I could tell a man "no" and have him see that as a challenge rather than an an … [Read more...]

Research Challenges Assumptions about Gender and Sex

Darwin

I grew up believing that men and women are different. I'm not talking just physically different, or just culturally different because they are socialized differently. I'm talking different. I was taught that men are designed to protect and provide, and women to care for children and nurture. I was taught that men wanted sex, and that women, being less sexual, were the gatekeepers. I was taught that men were just better at things like science and math while women were better at things like … [Read more...]

Some Thoughts on Child Custody

father children

Blogger Sheldon recently responded to my post on why my son Bobby needs feminism too, and while he praised the basic core of my post, he added this concern: She talks about patriarchy being causing problems for men, but I notice this problem has been overlooked (whether intentionally or unintentionally, I don't know).The divorce/family court system in the US very rarely gives full custody to men, or at the very least a decent shared custody agreement, very likely because of th … [Read more...]

The Intersection of Guns, Gender, and Violence

guns

The Sandy Hook shooting has brought guns into the spotlight once again, and as I've read about this issue in the blogs I follow I've been fascinated by the different ways in which gender has been brought into this discussion. I'm going to offer some quotations from several of these articles, along with a bit of commentary.First, Sam Harris responded to Sandy Hook by arguing that the answer is more guns, not fewer. His argument, which was covered by fellow Patheos blogger Hemant Mehta, was … [Read more...]

On “Equity Feminism” and “Gender Feminism”

gender

You may or may not have been following all the hoopla over feminism in the online atheist community in the last two years. While I have never addressed it directly on my blog, I've definitely kept up with it. Blogger vjack of Atheist Revolution has written about it quite a bit, and recently put up a post in which he suggests that the conflict stems from competing definitions of feminism: "equity feminism" and "gender feminism." Here is how he describes them: In a nutshell, equity feminism refers … [Read more...]


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