New Website Tackles Josh Harris’s “I Kissed Dating Goodbye” with Powerful Message

As a teen, Joshua Harris' 1997 book, I Kissed Dating Goodbye, played a fundamental role in shaping my perception toward dating, love, and romance. Today, several of my blogger friends have launched a website, titled Life After 'I Kissed Dating Goodbye', to highlight the stories of others whose relationships and life trajectories were fundamentally altered by Josh's book. They are asking for submissions, including both posts on personal blogs, which they can link up, and original essays. If your l … [Read more...]


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Is Josh Harris Actually Taking Responsibility?

Josh Harris was interviewed on NPR recently. I know this because my husband started yelling at me to come into the kitchen right freaking now and I was like, wait, you can't just order me to drop everything like that, that's not how it works, and he was like, trust me, you're going to want to hear this. And there it was. Josh Harris on NPR, discussing his 1997 book, I Kissed Dating Goodbye. After reading his apology two months ago to several bloggers who have, like me, spent years blogging … [Read more...]


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Not Every Courtship Looks Like the Duggars’

So, courtships. In a post I wrote recently on the Duggars, I mentioned that I "went through a controlling and manipulative courtship process and then lived in fear that my mother would find out I was having sex during my engagement." A reader objected, and this exchange followed:So, I think it's time for a public service announcement: Not all courtships look the same. It seems that the high-profile Duggar courtships have so shaped public perception of what a courtship within this … [Read more...]


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Guest Post: “You Are Not Your Own”: Unmarried Women Belong To Their Parents?

A Guest Post by Sarah MoonOriginally posted on Sarah over the Moon, an awesome blog full of feminist analysis of evangelical culture***Trigger Warning for rape, sexual assault***In case you haven’t been following my You Are Not Your Own series (you can catch up here), I analyzed four Christian dating books (Real Marriage, When God Writes Your Love Story, I Kissed Dating Goodbye, and Dateable) and I came up with four significant findings related to the area of rape and sexual a … [Read more...]


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Guest Post: I Hugged Dating Hello, Part V: Developing Intellectual Intimacy

A guest post by MollyPart V of An Open Letter to Joshua Harris “The premise of dating is ‘I’m attracted to you; therefore let’s get to know each other.’ The premise of friendship, on the other hand, is ‘We’re interested in the same things; let’s enjoy these common interests together.’ If romantic attraction forms after developing a friendship, it’s an added bonus” (39). Dear Josh,Intellectual intimacy was the hardest section for me to write because you don’t really discuss it beyond fin … [Read more...]


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Guest Post: I Hugged Dating Hello, Part IV: Casting Out Fear at the Intersection of Emotional and Sexual Intimacy

A guest post by MollyPart IV of An Open Letter to Joshua Harris “…I have no business asking for a girl’s heart and exclusive affections if I’m not ready to consider marriage. Until I can do that, I’d only be using that girl to meet my short-term needs, not seeking to bless her for the long term. Would I enjoy having a girlfriend right now? You bet! But I wouldn’t truly be loving her and putting her interests first” (19).“In most cases, especially when we’re younger, dating is short term … [Read more...]


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Guest Post: I Hugged Dating Hello, Part III: Developing Emotional Intimacy

A guest post by MollyPart III of An Open Letter to Joshua Harris “Before two people are ready for the responsibility of commitment, they should content themselves with friendship and wait on deep emotional intimacy. Exercising this patience will not handicap them relationally. In friendship, they can practice the skills of relating, caring, and sharing their lives with other people. In friendship, they can observe other people’s characters and begin to see what they’ll one day want in their … [Read more...]


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