Guest Post: “You Are Not Your Own”: Unmarried Women Belong To Their Parents?

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A Guest Post by Sarah MoonOriginally posted on Sarah over the Moon, an awesome blog full of feminist analysis of evangelical culture***Trigger Warning for rape, sexual assault***In case you haven’t been following my You Are Not Your Own series (you can catch up here), I analyzed four Christian dating books (Real Marriage, When God Writes Your Love Story, I Kissed Dating Goodbye, and Dateable) and I came up with four significant findings related to the area of rape and sexual a … [Read more...]

Guest Post: I Hugged Dating Hello, Part V: Developing Intellectual Intimacy

intellectual intimacy

A guest post by MollyPart V of An Open Letter to Joshua Harris “The premise of dating is ‘I’m attracted to you; therefore let’s get to know each other.’ The premise of friendship, on the other hand, is ‘We’re interested in the same things; let’s enjoy these common interests together.’ If romantic attraction forms after developing a friendship, it’s an added bonus” (39). Dear Josh,Intellectual intimacy was the hardest section for me to write because you don’t really discuss it beyond fin … [Read more...]

Guest Post: I Hugged Dating Hello, Part IV: Casting Out Fear at the Intersection of Emotional and Sexual Intimacy

self-care

A guest post by MollyPart IV of An Open Letter to Joshua Harris “…I have no business asking for a girl’s heart and exclusive affections if I’m not ready to consider marriage. Until I can do that, I’d only be using that girl to meet my short-term needs, not seeking to bless her for the long term. Would I enjoy having a girlfriend right now? You bet! But I wouldn’t truly be loving her and putting her interests first” (19).“In most cases, especially when we’re younger, dating is short term … [Read more...]

Guest Post: I Hugged Dating Hello, Part III: Developing Emotional Intimacy

emotional intimacy

A guest post by MollyPart III of An Open Letter to Joshua Harris “Before two people are ready for the responsibility of commitment, they should content themselves with friendship and wait on deep emotional intimacy. Exercising this patience will not handicap them relationally. In friendship, they can practice the skills of relating, caring, and sharing their lives with other people. In friendship, they can observe other people’s characters and begin to see what they’ll one day want in their … [Read more...]

Guest Post: I Hugged Dating Hello, Part II: Developing Spiritual Intimacy

Couple on Beach

A guest post by MollyPart II of An Open Letter to Joshua HarrisA note for readers: Molly is a progressive Christian who is looking at Harris' book and teachings through that lens. Please bear this in mind as you read this installment and be respectful with your responses.  Dear Josh,The last time we parted ways I left you with a quote from Julia Feder, an author featured at Women In Theology: sexual intimacy is only one form of relational intimacy—emotional intimacy, int … [Read more...]

Guest Post: I Hugged Dating Hello, Part I: Developing Relational Intimacies

relational

A guest post by MollyPart I of An Open Letter to Joshua HarrisDear Josh (May I call you Josh? You may call me Molly.)I recently finished reading your book I Kissed Dating Goodbye: A New Attitude Toward Romance and Relationship, and I want to share my reaction. I’m halfway through earning my Master of Divinity degree at a Presbyterian seminary on the East Coast, and my focus is looking at how enforcing “biblically-based” gender roles aids (or, in the case of most scenarios I’ve read, d … [Read more...]

What I Learned from Joshua Harris

I kissed dating goodbye

With his books I Kissed Dating Goodbye and Boy Meets Girl, Joshua Harris singlehandedly made the word "courtship" popular in mainstream evangelical circles. Yesterday I responded to a post another blogger wrote about what she learned from Joshua Harris. Today I'm following up by discussing what I learned from Joshua Harris. I don't own a copy of Harris' book at the moment, but given that this post is about the messages his book gave me at the time, not simply a review of his book, I think that's … [Read more...]


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