My First Crush

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Growing up on the conservative Christian homeschooling culture of courtship and purity rings made a lot of things about boy-girl interactions different. Everything was ramped up, accelerated somehow. Our mothers jumped straight from simple attractions on our part to the possibility of marriage. We did too.I still remember my first crush. I was seven. He was nine. I was homeschooled, but he wasn't. My mother and his mother knew each other from church. Finally, I got up the courage to ask him w … [Read more...]

Pastor Mark Driscoll Called Women “Penis Homes”

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Things have been getting worse and worse for Mark Driscoll in recent weeks. But what I want to point out for a moment is one of Driscoll's posts from 2001, when he was posting to a church message board under the name William Wallace II. I have rarely seen an evangelical man assert male superiority and prominence this directly. The first thing to know about your penis is, that despite the way it may see, it is not your penis. Ultimately, God created you and it is his penis. You are simply … [Read more...]

How Not to Address Marriage or Child Abuse

Rape Culture FB

I recently came upon an image posted on facebook by homeschool mom, speaker, and writer Heidi St. John. I'm not sure what's more disturbing---this image, or that none of the moms commenting on it saw this image as disturbing. The image is photoshopped from an old comic that depicts an employee sexually assaulting his "frigid" boss (see here and here or view the full comic here). Sure, one could try to argue that the image has been removed from that context, what with the new words in the bubb … [Read more...]

Israel Wayne on the (Patriarchal) Father’s Role

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Israel Wayne is supposed to be a voice of reason in the Christian homeschooling community. A homeschool graduate himself, and now a homeschool father, he travels the convention circuit and has written blog posts criticizing various patriarchal homeschool leaders. It's a pity he's unaware that he is himself one of those patriarchal homeschool leaders.Unless you’ve been living under a rock lately, you’ve heard the smash pop hit, “Rude” by the group Magic!. It speaks about a young man, seeking p … [Read more...]

Protecting Your Marriage from Adultery

marriage adultery

Guest Post by MeganOriginally posted on Public QuestionI feel the need to respond to something that’s popped up in my newsfeed several times. Before I launch into my response, I want to clarify some things: This is not an attack on Danielle, who seems to make people happy with her writing. This is not an attack on Christianity.This is an attack on the insidious way patriarchy—a human-made system & an ideology that is unbelievably insidious, invading even our most intimate act … [Read more...]

Premarital Sex and Marital Problems

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I've written a lot about my parents decision to have us children court rather than date. From time to time I've seen readers express confusion as to why parents would reject for their children a process that worked for them. The truth is that my parents turned to courtship for my siblings and I because they believed that dating hadn't worked for them.I recently mentioned that I was conceived before my parents married. In other words, when my parents taught my siblings and I abstinence before … [Read more...]

Patriarchy in Name Only?

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Evangelical Christians who believe in male headship and female submission but do not like the word "patriarchy" tend to use the term "complementarianism" instead. They speak of men naturally being better at some things (protecting, providing) and women naturally being better at other things (nurturing, caregiving), and speak of the two as "complements" of each other. While softer and gentler as eschewing the term, complementarianism, too, is patriarchy.But there's something very interesting … [Read more...]


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