Raised Quiverfull: A Gendered Childhood

In what ways were boys and girls in your family expected to dress or act differently from each other? Were there certain things it was appropriate for girls to do but not boys, and vice versa? Joe: Not really.  If we were boys, we were not supposed to have anything to do with girls.  If we were girls, we had nothing to do with boys.  That was pretty much it.  Of course, as I alluded to before, the girls' wardrobe was much stricter than the boys and in the later years, the boys were able to wea … [Read more...]


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Who are the Real Babies? House-Proofing and Modesty

I was raised on the Pearls' disciplinary methods. The Pearls teach that you don't child-proof your house, you house-proof your child. As soon as a child is old enough to move around, say nine or ten months, you teach her what not to touch. If she reaches for a laptop left out on the couch, you tell her "no" and give her a little slap on the hand. If she does it again, you repeat, over and over, until she eventually learns not to touch it.I was also raised on the modesty teachings of the purity … [Read more...]


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Worthwhile Reads: The “Modesty Doctrine” Hurts Men Too

From time to time, I plan to point my blog readers to articles on other blogs that I find especially good. I'm really grateful to my blogging friend Sierra for writing excellent pieces on the problem with what she calls "the modesty doctrine."Just today Sierra posted an amazing article called "How the Modesty Doctrine Hurts Men Too." I highly recommend you take a look, she's spot on.Sierra previously wrote an excellent piece on how the modesty doctrine affected her own life. For that, click … [Read more...]


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The Purity Myth

This is beautiful. For a full transcript, see here. I think the very best part comes at the end: "The purity myth is the lie that women’s sexuality has some bearing on who we are and how good we are, because really I think we all know that young women are so much more than whether or not they have sex. We really should be teaching our daughters that their ability to be good people should be based on their intelligence, on their compassion, their kindness, not what they do with their b … [Read more...]


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Critiquing the Purity Culture

When I wrote about the purity culture and sexual dysfunction last week, I had no idea how many chords that simple post would touch. I had no idea how much attention it would get. Only fifteen hours after I posted it, it had more page views than any other post I have ever posted. Not more than any other post had after fifteen hours, more than any other post had total. Today, it has more than twice as many page views than any other post. To be perfectly honest, this attention surprised me. Perhaps … [Read more...]


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Purity Balls: They’re Barking Up the Wrong Tree

Yesterday I posted about about purity balls, and pointed out that fathers should have nothing to do with their daughters' virginity, unless they're reverting to some sort of Old Testament "fathers own their daughters virginity and women are property" mentality. Since then I have watched this documentary and done some thinking. See, the argument is more sophisticated than "your virginity belongs to your father."In the documentary, Randy Wilson of Generations of Light Ministry states that … [Read more...]


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Your Virginity is YOURS – Not Your Daddy’s

I just came across this:Golden Isles Father Daughter Purity BallYou really should go to the link and look at the pictures. Let me give you some examples below:Here's the thing. I have nothing against a girl deciding not to have sex until marriage, but that needs to be her choice. It's not her dad's choice, not her pastor's choice, not her mom's choice, not anyone else's choice. If a girl decides she wants to not have sex until marriage, it's her … [Read more...]


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