Raised Quiverfull: Culture Shock

Since most of the world doesn’t understand Quiverfull/Christian Patriarchy culture, do you feel this creates barriers in friendships or in romantic relationships? Do people have a hard time understanding you and your past? Joe: Coming soon. Latebloomer: It seems like people are much more interested in who I am now than in who I used to be.  Personally, I try not to bring up my past until a relationship or friendship feels more established.  It is often hard to avoid though because there are a … [Read more...]

Raised Quiverfull: On Sticking Out

Do you still feel as though you are “different” or that your past experiences emotionally isolate you from society? Joe: Coming soon. Latebloomer: I definitely feel the effects of my past even today.  Because I was isolated from my peers in my formative years, social interaction takes a lot more concentration for me than for others.  In a way, it’s kind of like I’m operating in a foreign culture with different rules about what is acceptable and offensive.   Additionally, conversations in this … [Read more...]

Raised Quiverfull: Relationships with Siblings

Have any of your siblings (or perhaps even parents) left Quiverfull/Christian Patriarchy ideology? How do you approach the relationships with siblings who have not? Joe: I would say half of my siblings have left and the other half still hang on to a little bit of the ideology or envelope themselves in it.  All I can do is communicate factual and logical information to them.  Recently, my brother left a Gothard law college because of facts I led him to and others have begun to vaccinate their c … [Read more...]

Raised Quiverfull: Coming “Out”

For those who are no longer Christian, are you “out” to your parents or siblings? If so, how did you do it and how did they respond? Joe: I am out to everyone and their grandma.  Most of them roll their eyes.  Others have followed in my footsteps.  Some mock me behind the scenes.  Some even confront me with an audience.  Regardless, I still love them all. Latebloomer: I still consider myself a Christian, although I’m so liberal in my opinions that many Christians would not want to share the l … [Read more...]

Raised Quiverfull: Relationship with Family Today

What is your relationship with your parents and siblings like today? What is your relationship with those you grew up with who remained in the movement like? Joe: I have completely closed the door on all communication with my mother.  No calls, no emails, no letters, no visits, nothing.  The mind games she played became too much for my children and, most of all, my wife, that we mutually decided to close the door on that area of our life. My siblings and I were very close growing up.  We st … [Read more...]

Raised Quiverfull: The Family Responds to Questioning

How did your parents and siblings respond to you questioning/rejecting their beliefs? How did those you grew up with respond? Joe: When I met, Kristine, the woman I have been married to for almost 11 years, I had already left my singly mother who very sincerely and deeply followed Bill Gothard.  Regardless of her lifestyle. I still felt that I needed to be completely open with her about everything in my life.  Knowing she would be hateful toward Kristine, I told her anyway - and she was h … [Read more...]

Raised Quiverfull: How Many Remained?

Among those you grew up around who were also raised with Christian Patriarchy/Quiverfull ideology, what proportion has remained in the movement and what proportion has left? Joe: The majority have left the movement and still cling to the religion.  I relate more to my new friends. Latebloomer: I am not really in contact with any of the parents of the movement; however, of the teens, I don’t know of anyone who remained in the movement in adulthood.  Today, they cover a wide range of beliefs fr … [Read more...]