Today I’m Proud of Joshua Harris


So, have you heard the news? Joshua Harris is stepping down from his role of head pastor of Covenant Life Church and heading to Vancouver to attend seminary at Regent College. I don't know much about Regent, though the Washington Post described it as "mainstream." Not only that, but Josh is planning to send his kids to public school while he attends seminary. Public school. This is huge, and it's hard to describe how much it means to me.Josh Harris was the oldest child of Greg Harris, a w … [Read more...]

“Hey, Dreamboat!”: Teenage Girls Get Mocked Too


I wrote a week ago about conversations within gaming, fandom, and nerd culture over dating and social reclusiveness. Specifically, I looked at a post by a self-described "nerdy guy" about his adolescent and young adult anger toward women for not dating him and a response post by a self-described "nerdy girl" pointing out that guys aren't the only ones to be shy, socially awkward, and thwarted in love. Today I want to build on that conversation with another point.I've seen men online (and, … [Read more...]

Longing for Love; Or, It’s Not Just Nerdy Boys


I've generally refrained from commenting on the #gamergate controversy and issues surrounding nerd or gamer culture. Partly this is because I have never been a nerd or a gamer. I suppose my status as a Whovian, my love for Firefly, and my interest in cosplay may place me on the outskirts of those communities, nut I've never felt connected enough to claim membership. But I do want to weigh in for a moment. I've noticed that many adolescent and young adult men in nerd/gamer culture seem to feel … [Read more...]

Do Traditional Gender Roles Lead to Good Sex? No.


I recently read a blog post from several years ago that had me doing that whole "but . . . wait . . . what . . . NO" thing throughout my reading of it. I thought I'd share, because illustrates something we've seen before---the idea that anything good in a marriage must of necessity be a result of following the gender roles God laid out, not, you know, a result of things like communication or compromise. I've covered posts in the past by women who are functionally living in egalitarian marriages … [Read more...]

The Longsuffering Godly Abused Wife


One thing we read a lot about in Created To Be His Help Meet was how to win an unsaved of sinning husband. Debi's basic advice was to submit, to be subservient, and to obey with a smile. I recently came upon a blog post from this past summer by a woman who claims she followed this advice, and successfully won over her porn-addicted husband. Let's take a look, shall we?The author begins by describing her childhood and teenage years at length. She writes that she was the target of bullying, a … [Read more...]

Does He Treat You Right?


In my previous post, I wrote about cultural messaging regarding how fathers should respond to their daughters dating both displays an utter lack of trust of young women and a normalization of violence toward other males. Two readers, however, pointed out that this messaging also portrays males as inherently sexual predators and thugs.Reader Nathaniel put it like this: I've been lucky enough to have grown in a community that never had anyone say something like this to me. Still pisses me off … [Read more...]

Be Still My Heart: Crushes and Guy-Girl Friendships


By some quirk, the families we spent the most time with all had girls my age, and no boys my age whatsoever. I don't know why this was the case, because it wasn't like my mom was intentionally avoiding befriending people who had sons my age. Yes, there were a few families with boys my age in our homeschool community, and occasionally we were in the same co-ops with them. But in my family, it was difficult to form friendships with kids if their parents weren't friends of my parents, so I never … [Read more...]