You Don’t Write Your Kids’ Lives (They Do)

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Good gracious, I just came upon a Babble article titled Jessa Duggar Will Have a Chaste Courtship---And My Kids Will, Too. With all due respect, author Kacy Faulconer has no idea whether or not her children will have "chaste courtships." My parents said their children would have chaste courtships too, and guess what? I didn't! Kacy can give her children whatever advice she chooses, but ultimately, once they're adults, she cannot control their choices.I talk a lot here on the blog about the … [Read more...]

Testosterone: Biblical Patriarchy’s Kryptonite

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Several weeks ago, I talked to my mom about Doug Phillips' affair and the closing of Vision Forum Ministries. My mom talked about how sad that was, and how bad she felt for Doug's wife and children, all of which I'd been expecting. But she didn't stop there, and I hadn't expected her to."Well," she concluded, shaking her head, "he's male."And she clearly felt that explained it. But I was not content to let that go. "Actually mom, most guys manage to not cheat on their wives," I told her. … [Read more...]

It depends upon what the meaning of the word “know” is

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This from Doug Phillips' original "Statement of resignation": There has been serious sin in my life for which God has graciously brought me to repentance. I have confessed my sin to my wife and family, my local church, and the board of Vision Forum Ministries.  I engaged in a lengthy, inappropriate relationship with a woman. While we did not “know” each other in a Biblical sense, it was nevertheless inappropriately romantic and affectionate. This from Doug Phillips' recent "Clarification on Res … [Read more...]

Pulling the Victoria’s Secret Dance

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Fundamentalist and conservative evangelical Christianity is weird. Women are taught to dress modestly in public, to stay away from pornography or premarital sex, etc. Prostitutes and strippers are derided, along with everyone who dresses "like a whore" (i.e. less modestly than they're supposed to). But in private, within marriage? Women are expected to perform. They have to somehow go from reserved modesty to being, well, a man's personal supermodel.Take this blog comment, for instance: I … [Read more...]

The Homosexual Deathstyle; or, A Fixation on Gay Sex

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A couple years back, I watched a documentary called For the Bible Tells Me So, which looks at five Christian families with gay or lesbian children. Something one of the mothers said really struck me. She said that after her daughter first came out, and introduced her girlfriend, all she could think about was her daughter and her girlfriend having sex, and how disgusting that was. She said that over time, she was able to make a sort of peace with her daughter because she began to see more than … [Read more...]

Dear Sister: On Your Thirteenth Birthday

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I can't believe you are almost thirteen. I remember holding you in my arms when you were a baby. I remember rocking you, smiling at you, cooing to you. I remember your tiny fingers and your dark, soft hair. I remember dressing you, bathing you, cuddling you close. I was always the first to jump up and volunteer to get you up when that sweet plaintive wail came from your cradle.Thirteen. Wow. You've grown so big, so tall and clever. I know what thirteen means. Dad will take you out to dinner a … [Read more...]

“Displayed in a Partially Unwrapped Condition”

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I recently came upon this from an article by Michael Pearl from a few years back: Most “Christian” young people are “damaged goods.” Church youth groups are hotbeds of immorality. And I am not limiting my evaluation just to those that have copulated. Would you buy a candy bar that had not been eaten, but the wrapper had been partially removed? What if it had not been handled, just displayed in a partially unwrapped condition? Would you buy the candy bar if it had not been eaten, but just licked? … [Read more...]


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