Under Her Father’s Authority

father daughter

In many ways, my upbringing and background isn't that weird. Yes, I had twice as many siblings as most people have cousins, but in general my upbringing was very normal---for the evangelical subculture, that is. But when I tell people about my background, the thing that always trips them up is the part about unmarried adult daughters being under their fathers' authority, to the point of requiring complete submission and obedience. This is . . . weird, even for the evangelical world. But in the … [Read more...]

Up Is Down and Down Is Up

topsy turvy

I recently came upon this quote from the Botkins, and it reminded me of everything I left behind when I rejected my parents' belief that, as an unmarried adult daughter, I was under my father's authority: Many stay-at-home girls believe that, as they become adults, their fathers’ jurisdiction over their lives will lessen. They feel that, in order to mature into individuals able to think and act for themselves, they must be “liberated” from another’s input into their lives. This is … [Read more...]

Raised Quiverfull: Stay at Home Daughters

college2

In what ways were boys and girls in your family raised differently vocationally (i.e., the boys pushed toward careers and the girls pushed toward homemaking)? How did this play out as you came of age (apprenticeship, college, staying home, etc.)? Joe: The girls were not allowed to go to college.  Not until they escaped from the prison anyway.  Also, for years, Mama hated the idea of college due to Bill Gothard's ignorance, and forbade any of the boys to plan their secondary education.  But, … [Read more...]

Jasmine Baucham, CollegePlus, and Leaving Things Out

CollegePlus is a Christian organization that guides students through the process of getting online degrees through a state college in New Jersey. You CLEP, you take online classes, and anything with a lab you take at your local community college - and the whole time you have a CollegePlus (same gender) tutor/guidance counselor helping you. Oh, and a character training program you do on the side, which is a CollegePlus thing and not a requirement of the state college in new Jersey. Vision … [Read more...]

Raised Quiverfull: “Typical” and “Atypical”

Quiverfull4

In what ways was your family a “typical” Christian Patriarchy/Quiverfull family? In what ways was it “atypical”? Joe: We were “typical” insomuch as we attended a conservative church, made decisions only from the Bible, appeared completely normal on the outside, and claimed that our lives would be lived out as was set forth in all patriarchal/Quiverfull beliefs.  We believed doctors were beyond evil and everything could be cured with a clove of garlic or drinking apple cider … [Read more...]

The Stay At Home Daughters: A Dream Greater Than Stardom?

Do you remember my post on diminished dreams? I recently came upon a book called Joyfully at Home on the Vision Forum website, and I think the promo has to be the saddest thing I've read in a long time: By age fourteen, Jasmine Baucham’s little-girl dreams of becoming a mommy were supplanted by bigger visions of winning the Pulitzer Prize or an Oscar and appearing on Oprah. She began viewing the calling of home and marriage as second-rate. Then her world was radically challenged by the … [Read more...]

Dutiful Daughters

Whether one watches the Duggars’ TLC show or reads books by the Botkin sisters, one cannot escape the reality that dutiful daughters of Christian Patriarchy do exist. Heck, they even blog. I used to be one of them. For nearly twenty years, I was a dutiful daughter of patriarchy, and more than that, I was a happy and contented daughter of patriarchy. I was in some sense a poster child of the movement. What enabled me to be such a happy and dutiful daughter of patriarchy? While I cannot … [Read more...]


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