A website dedicated to William Topaz McGonagall

… Victorian-era Scot and the writer of the worst poetry in the English language.

This *is* a find!

Savor this:

The Tay Bridge Disaster:

“…As soon as the catastrophe came to be known

The alarm from mouth to mouth was blown,

And the cry rang out all o’er the town,

Good Heavens! the Tay Bridge is blown down,

And a passenger train from Edinburgh,

Which fill’d all the peoples hearts with sorrow,

And made them for to turn pale,

Because none of the passengers were sav’d to tell the tale

How the disaster happen’d on the last Sabbath day of 1879,

Which will be remember’d for a very long time….”

The Burning of the Exeter Theater:

“…Alas! words fail to describe the desolation,

And in many homes it will cause great lamentation;

Because human remains are beyond all identification,

Which will cause the relatives of the sufferers to be in great


The Christmas Goose:

“…So the naughty boy was put in prison

For stealing the goose.,

And got ten days’ confinement

Before he got loose….”

General Gordon, The Hero of Khartoum:

“…He always took the Bible for his guide,

And he liked little boys to walk by his side;

He preferred their company more so than men,

Because he knew there was less guile in them….

…Yes, the black-hearted traitor opened the gates of Khartoum,

And through that the Christian hero has met his doom,

For when the gates were opened the Arabs rushed madly in,

And foully murdered him while they laughingly did grin….”