This Could be Fun for Victor Lams

The following is from the Washington Post Style Invitational contest that asks readers to submit “instructions” for something (anything), but written in the style of a famous person.

The winning entry was

The Hokey Pokey (as written by W. Shakespeare).

O proud left foot, that ventures quick within

Then soon upon a backward journey lithe.

Anon, once more the gesture, then begin:

Command sinistral pedestal to writhe.

Commence thou then the fervid Hokey-Poke,

A mad gyration, hips in wanton swirl.

To spin! A wilde release from Heavens yoke.

Blessed dervish! Surely canst go, girl.

The Hoke, the poke — banish now thy doubt

Verily, I say, ’tis what it’s all about.

Feel free to use the comments boxes to re-write your favorite pop or country tune in Elizabethan or other high-falutin’ poetic language.


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