In a joint agreement with the US, Canada agreed to implement in as hurried and reckless a way as possible, and by judicial fiat, sweeping social changes that overturn millions of years of human experience and hundreds of years of English common law “just to see what will happen”.
“Hey! What could it hurt?” was the official statement released by the Ontario Court of Appeals on Tuesday, “Besides, we figured that if it does turn out to be the unmitigated social catastrophe that so much liberal tinkering and judicial tyranny has turned out to be.. well, better that it happen to a relatively unimportant country like Canada than to our great Neighbor to the South, the United States. We in Canada are happy and proud to launch heedlessly into grand social experiments based on the demands of a small shrill minority and the elitist whims of a few judicial plutocrats. America: keep your eyes on us. If we go down the toilet, you’ll know not to follow us.”
The United States expressed its appreciation to Canada for this self-sacrificial gesture which would help assure America’s continued economic and social supremacy on the North American continent. It expressed appreciation to our Neighbor to the North for its willingness to serve as a warning to us. Meanwhile, a spokesperson for the Gay Fascist Alliance expressed appreciation for Canada’s willingness to lead the way in judicial tyranny. In a prepared statement, the Gay Fascist Alliance said that “Here in the United States, we still cling to the outdated notion that such matters should be settled by the corporate deliberation of the People through the elective process. The People! Hah! As if they have anything to say! We applaud Canada’s courageous forthrightness in letting their Robed Masters decide such things for the common herd.”