Find any trendy fad or slogan such as the current panic about the “War on Women” and voila! Global Warming, er, Global Climate Disruption, er, Climate Change is responsible. So naturally, House Democrats have discovered that Climate Change turns women into prostitutes.
It also hides your car keys, scratches your CDs, dates your girlfriend behind your back, and short sheets your bed. It planned the Kennedy assassination, wrote that embarrassing piece of graffiti in that one bathroom stall back in high school, and rigged “American Idol”. It causes body odor, that funny taste in Easter chocolate, and excess ear wax.
Don’t I believe in Climate Change? Two points: 1) Sure. What else does climate do except change? 2) Have you noticed, gentle reader, how the language of faith is perpetually deployed to discuss the omnipotent god Climate Change? Nobody asks if you believe in pressure gradients, hydraulics, or nuclear fission. But Climate Change is always discussed in terms of faith language. Why is that, do you think?