Marriage and the Easy Yoke

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“Are you so pissed at your husband for making you move?” The stylist’s fingers were moving quick through my hair, applying white and blue chemicals, in effort to sustain my vain pursuit of the blonde strands I grew out of 15 years ago. I’d been explaining about our coming move, how this would be my [Read More...]

Wherever I Send You, Whatever it Costs You

from livethemma.ikea.se via Berber on Pinterest

A week and a half ago, prior to my grandfather’s funeral, as I ate a large family meal in the fellowship hall of the Boyett Baptist Church (no, that’s not really its name!), I encountered a third or fourth cousin, someone I hadn’t seen since my high school years when I’m sure we talked at [Read More...]

What’s saving my life this week.

Pawpaw and Memaw, with my aunt Rita in 1947

This week my friend Sarah Bessey asked the question at her blog: What’s saving your life right now? Grief is a strange thing, isn’t it? It’s so deep and wild and untamable. And it wakes up whenever it wants to and leaves you with your face in your hands in the dark bedroom on the [Read More...]

Poem-a-Day Friday: Farah Marklevits

Farah Marklevits is a friend of mine from Syracuse. I spent three years of graduate school in a workshop with the same five poets, who taught me as much about writing as our professors. (Ours was a special group. We actually loved each other, which never happens in MFA programs like ours.) I shared many cups [Read More...]

After the trip: Thankful

There’s no one with whom I would rather spend 20 hours in the car (Wednesday and Sunday combined, mind you) than my husband. Isn’t it amazing that I still like him so much, especially when the back seat is full of weeping children? A sister-in-law who is willing to cut my boy’s hair for me. [Read More...]

Absence, marriage and making that little heart grow fonder

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So yesterday I came across an article in Slate about a new book by Iris Krasnow, who has spent every July for the past decade away from her husband of almost a quarter century. Her book is called The Secret Lives of Wives: Women Share What It Really Takes To Stay Married, and much of [Read More...]


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