Monday’s post Between a Rock and Hard Place: Triple Threats and Double Troubles for Muslim Women was featured on Racialicious today. And in the comments there was a really good question:
“I wonder what should non-muslims do to help.
I read Aaminah Hernández’s excellent post earlier today (Nadia linked to it up thread) and saw a specific point saying that “she did not need to be saved.” And it occurs to me, that’s what a lot of people think they are doing when they condemn Islam – helping to save the women who are “silenced and voiceless.” Noting that all of Islam isn’t like that tends to fall on deaf ears. The implication is “oh, you want to defend a religion that does XYZ to women?”
Hernández states in her post that the best way to help is to “stand back and let her do her thing” and provide back up as necessary. Cool, I can handle that.
But is there anything I can do when no one steps forward and the assumptions are rolling by unchallenged? (Or worse, when someone comes by and says they are “liberated” from Islam and they speak from a position of authority about how bad things are?)
Disapproving silence is woefully inadequate sometimes.”
So, sisters, what do you think? I’d like your opinions on this. What can non-Muslims do to help in situations like these, or when Muslim women are actually unable to help themselves?
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Asalaamu alaikum.Just sharing my answer I posted at Racialicious:”Hi Latoya,I really hope to see what Fatemah says in response to your questions.My response is that you are right, you shouldn’t feel silenced either when you think something might be wrong. You should feel free to say “that might not be the only perspective on that” or to ask “have you talked to actual practicing Muslims about that?” or “where did you get your information?”. You should feel free to say “hey, I’m not a Muslim woman so I really can’t speak to that, but what you’re saying doesn’t make sense to me/doesn’t sound like the whole story/sounds kinda like you take all your info from weird sources”. Why should everyone else be able to spew whatever they want and you feel that you can’t say anything just because you don’t have the authority? You have the right to share your thoughts too, even if it is only to plant the seed that something isn’t looking right or suggest that real Muslims and real Muslim women be brought into the discussion.”
Hey, are you punishing us for not answering by not having a Wednesday post?So, anyway, a non-Muslim can do is condemn actions without condemning Islam. If someone with whom the person is speaking does blame Islam for the human rights abuses, then the non-Muslim can say, “That is not a universal understanding of Islam, just like…” and give an example of any other religion being twisted to serve a political, social, or economic agenda that demands the oppression of others.
HAHAHAH! Melinda! You caught me! My feelings were hurt because nobody replied, so I’m like, forget a Wednesday post, even though I already have some lined up! Wow, I’m petty, huh?
Salaam Alaikum,The comments over at Racialicious are atrocious. They want to talk about Muslim women, but not to them.
Waleykum salam, Safiya. I think, for the most part, you are correct. But many of them either defended my positions/agreed with me, or wanted to see what they could do to help as non-Muslims (primarily in LaToya’s case). That’s why I posted this here. I wanted to ask Muslims what it is we want non-Muslims to do to help us, if they feel so inclined. By “help,” I don’t mean “save” us, however.
Whoa.Here again, I don’t know what to do. This is kind of like the comments that happened before with me and Nadia, but to a more severe degree, which I kind of expected.I noticed that on Muslim posts, our regulars do not comment. I do not know why this is, but I have a feeling. And the people now doing the same thing I did before Nadia called me on my prejudice.I don’t know how to address this. I was already developing a post about tone and intent (because to me, those are two very important parts of messaging and people approach them differently.) I also want to develop a post about having liberal views but still having little blind spots of prejudice that you don’t see. So I want to address both sides, but I can’t think of how to do it to make people understand.
Hello! I’m new here. I found your blog via Racialicious.com.I’m a non-Muslim from Michigan and I try my best to stand up against any prejudice against Muslim women that I see or hear in my surroundings because as a bi-racial Christian woman I am familar with the sting of racism and having someone make false presumptions about your faith.I grew up around Arab-Americans so it really bothers me when I see things in the media that paint all people of Middle-Eastern descent as terrorists or people to be afraid of. That’s so not true!!! Some of my good friends growing up were Chaldean. Sadly, most people outside of Michigan tend to be pretty clueless when it comes to grasping the concept of a Christian Arab. They want to lump all Arab people together and label them one way. I wish my fellow Americans would take the time to learn how to use the terms “Muslim” and “Islam” properly so they wouldn’t say stupid stuff and call people “Islamic” when they should be saying “Muslim”. Like I said before, I try my best to help in a way that I myself would want to be helped. As a minority (I’m part black) I’d like people outside my ethnicity to stand up for misconceptions about black people. That’s half the battle. There’s a different gravity when a white person checks another white person joking about a black person. Or when an Asian-American person checks another Asian-American person. Or when a Christian checks another Christian about a stereotype of a Muslim, etc. There’s no savior complex there. Standing up and saying “that’s not cool” when someone of your own race/religion says or agrees to something whack about another race/religion holds a different kind of authority. We need more of that going on. p.s. You have a nice blog. Keep up the good work!http://solshine7.blogspot.com