how to shape the dreams of our girls

Most people aren't even aware that they are limiting the dreams of girls. Most aren't conscious of the fact that they are shaping the dreams of their daughters and female students into a sexist ideal or a misogynist fantasy. Not only do men do this, but women too. This can be corrected.I was raised in a sexist culture. I need constant instruction to overcome my innate assumptions that are drilled into me by our misogynist society. I'm glad to be married to a strong woman. I'm glad to have a … [Read more...]

Envision, Plan and Make Your Escape

Envision, Plan and Make Your EscapeOur absolutely unbelievably amazing online community, The Lasting Supper, is entirely made up of escape artists: people who've escaped or are in the process of escaping from unhealthy churches, relationships, jobs and other unhappy situations. (I warmly invite you to come and join us.) Today I want to share with you some observations I've made from my own life as well as the lives of my friends about escaping.My Sophia series of 52 drawings, in a … [Read more...]

Blogging, Social Media and Fight the Good Fight

I think it is possible for people with profound disagreements to get along. We can be congenial while we argue. We can even be friends while we fight. Like after a good mixed martial arts match, we can hug and pat each other on the butt and say "Good fight!".I'm observing something that is happening online, especially in blogs and social media like Twitter and Facebook. It seems that there are two majority opinions about disagreeing with others that ends up dismissive in their … [Read more...]

What My Wife Says When I Apologize Like Rick Warren

Apologizing is agonizing work. I know because I do it a lot.My wife Lisa is an amazing person. She has taught me how to apologize. (No, this is not a wife joke.) I'm serious! When I first started needing to apologize to Lisa, she made it clear that she wanted me to actually feel sorry for what I did, which meant that I had to be aware of what I actually did, then make amends and promise to not do it again. Easy: own it; admit it; change it.It seems that half-apologies are becoming more … [Read more...]

John MacArthur Sends 500,000,000 Charismatics to Hell

I noticed Tim Challies posted an article on John MacArthur's Strange Fire Conference the other day so I check it out. MacArthur's church hosted the Strange Fire conference last weekend, a conference devoted to the critique of the charismatic movement. I read Challies' post as well as watched  John MacArthur's address that opened the event and set its condemning tone.When I read Challies' notes at first I didn't believe them. Challies doesn't interject his opinion, but neither does he … [Read more...]

Do you want a community or an organization?

I've always been passionate about community. Pastoring local churches over the years was a 30 year experiment on whether authentic community can be created and enjoyed. By the time I finished my ministry in 2010, I believe I had figured a lot of it out. I even wrote a book about it, Without a Vision My People Prosper, in which I argue that vision and goal-setting works against authentic community. The book is basically an assemblage of my blog posts on the topic. I really didn't expect it to fly … [Read more...]

Why I Wouldn’t Attend Pastor Steepek’s Church

Why I Would Not Attend Pastor Jeremiah Steepek's ChurchI saw this story circulating around Facebook of Pastor Jeremiah Steepek who transformed himself into a homeless person and attended the church he had just been hired by on the first Sunday. He was passed by, overlooked, and asked to sit in the back pew. Instead of getting some needed spare change he got dirty looks.After the new pastor was introduced by the elders, Pastor Steepek, the homeless person, walked to the front to the … [Read more...]

the z-theory and Santa Claus

(*** spoiler alert…) I think I can safely assume that as children we all believed in a Santa Claus who lived at the North Pole and delivered gifts to good people on Christmas Day faithfully every year. And then we got the news that Santa Claus isn't a real person. That fairy tale no longer served. We had to learn that it represented the "spirit of Christmas", and that anyone who gave was, in a sense, Santa Claus.At one point we believed that God is an all-powerful being who sits in Heaven on … [Read more...]

the z-theory in a simple diagram and explanation

I posted this for my other site, the online community The Lasting Supper, but I thought I would share it with you as well.Hopefully this will help some of you understand the z-theory better. It is based on a waterfall dream I had a few years ago that left me the impression it graphically depicted the structure of reality. I suggest this diagram can be used by all religions and world-views.So as I try to explain to my Christian friends, this is why I rarely, if ever, use the word "God", … [Read more...]

why Rob Bell’s short response to homosexuality is good and reusable

This is why I think Rob Bell's one minute affirmation of homosexuality makes sense, and why I think you can use this to answer similar questions regarding similar issues:He doesn't theorize in a vacuum: In this video at least, he is answering this difficult question in the "epicenter of gay culture", among gays, answering a gay man face to face. Plus the fact that he mentions his gay friend lends weight to it. He doesn't invoke scripture: I believe relying on scripture to refute or affirm … [Read more...]