All beautiful the march of days, as seasons come and go; The Hand that shaped the rose hath wrought the crystal of the snow
by Shelly Cruz
I drew closer to Christ through my relationship with Cecilia; there was no doubt about it. The more time I spent with her, the more I opened my bible to see if all the things I was learning, matched up with the word of God.
I was learning so much from her. Some good things, and some things that really made me scratch my chin in dismay. I learned that if you were a real Christian, then you were to only home school your children. However, My church taught us that we could also send our children to a Christian school. That was acceptable too. This really confused me.
I also learned that certain colors were more acceptable for modest dress, and that the way you wore your hair, and the color of it, affected the way people perceived you. I learned that you should not speak unless spoken too, and depending on how many rhymes and rhythms were in a music song, determined if it was a REAL Christian song, worthy of listening too.
I learned that the medical field was not my friend. I was taught all things natural, and that God gave to us the seeds of the fields to use as medicine. Per (Genesis 1:29) I was taught that you should never leave your children alone with anyone without your, or your older children’s presence. The mother, father, or oldest sibling were to be with their younger siblings at all times. We, the parents, were also to be our children’s only teachers, per (Deuteronomy 6:1-9).
The one thing that still stands out in my mind, was the story of the popcorn kernel, that Cecilia shared with me one evening. Evidently, one of Cecilia’s sons put a popcorn seed in his ear when he was three years old. The popcorn seed stayed in the ear until the boy was a teen and it worked its way out naturally. This is a story that one just does not forget easily. It sounded very strange to me at the time, but I guess if there was no pain in the child’s ear, so be it.
Cecilia had almost a dozen kids, I had only two, what did I know about parenting?
There was also the story of the crooked tooth. Evidently, if you feel that braces may be needed for one of your children, you can actually start slowly to push the tooth, or teeth in question each day, towards their rightful place, and sooner or later the teeth will fix themselves and become straight. No braces or medical treatment needed at all! In fact, several of Cecilia’s children fixed their own teeth in this manner.
I learned that everything is to be handled at home in a family environment, no outsiders were allowed into any private areas of your life. One of Cecilia’s sons broke an arm once, falling down the stairs, and he had to go to the hospital, but that was it. The boy was never left alone while at the hospital either, not even once. The family stayed with him at all times.
Other than this one occasion, none of Cecilia’s perfect children had ever been to a doctor’s office. I was amazed, and still am to this day, thinking of the dozen times each year that my children have to go to the doctor’s office. Stomachaches, ear infections, UTI’s, fevers, and the like. Why was it that God saw fit to bless Cecilia in all areas of her life, but not me?
What was I doing so wrong? Was there a sin that I had forgotten to confess?
These are just a few of the many questions that I would start asking myself throughout the coming months.
That all said, I made it a point to not judge this family’s ways. I yearned to learn more from them with each visit we had with one another.
I was intrigued by all the Faith that my new friend shared with me. For the first time in my life, I was inspired! Inspired to do the right thing, in all areas of my life. For a time, I was living with blinders on, it was becoming very clear as days passed, the blinders were coming off, or were they? Was this all an illusion? Was I becoming closer to Christ?
I began dropping to my knees each night, praying asking God to show me the truth. Convict me in ways like never before! I began asking God to spiritually clean my home from head to toe, as well as every area in my life. I too, wanted to become fruitful, and have God bless my life with the most excellent marriage and a quiverful of sweet adoring children.
With so much going on in my new life; a life of searching for truth, love and acceptance, some other things started to arise. Some very sad things, that I wish I could undo nowadays.
My current friends would call me, asking me to go here or there, but I was just too consumed with Cecilia and her family to entertain my old friends anymore. I began to decline all the invitations to go to scrapbook parties, or out to the mall shopping.
I wanted to leave my date book open, in case Cecilia would call me for a last minute get together. Soon my friends stopped calling me altogether. I would occasionally get together with them, but when I would casually bring up natural home remedies or modesty issues to them, they would look at me weird and change the subject. I began to feel unaccepted by them, and begin to cling more and more on my new friendship, a friendship that I hoped would last forever. I wanted so badly to have a sister growing up. Cecilia was filling that void in me.
I grew up having no sisters at home and only had one female cousin that was considerably younger than me, so I really felt that I had no real sisterhood in my life.
My husband also began bonding with Cecilia’s husband and this made me very happy to witness. My husband grew up in a big family, with many brothers, but was never close to any of them. I guess large families do not always guarantee close family ties, once you all reach adulthood.
I wanted to make things different for my own children, and felt that by having my children around Cecilia’s “model” children, things would all fall into place. Cecilia’s children were the perfect role models for my children. They all became fast friends. I was very happy about this. After all, who needs a dozen friends? By now, our families were getting together every few days and I was super excited to finally have someone in my life to be a good role model to me. My very own Titus 2 friend! It felt so good!!!
As the old saying goes, The grass is not always greener on the other side.
Many days would pass, and I started feeling a sense of loss, and uncertainty, but could not figure out what it was. There were certain things that I was silently questioning myself. Like, ”Why would having a Cabbage Patch doll in ones home cause a mother to have a miscarriage”? And, “Why was it that, if you had any of those 1980’s troll dolls in your home, it meant that Satan was presently active, and you would become barren”?
These things that Cecilia would sometimes mention to me during our frequent visits, seemed a bit crazy, to say the least, but I had no plans of ever questioning Miss. Perfect.
Time would soon be unraveling itself, I just had to patient…
Time Heals All Wounds by Shelly Cruz: