Mama’s Choice – Part 6: Inception

by Vyckie Garrison

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Ever since I watched the movie, Inception, I’ve wanted to shout to the world, Wow – that happened to me! And here I thought Quiverfull was my own idea all along!!

If you haven’t seen the movie, here’s a quick summary: “Inception” is the implantation of another person’s idea into a target’s subconscious. A thief, who possesses the ability to project himself deep inside the subconscious of a victim’s mind in order to steal their ideas, is hired to reverse the process – he must plant an idea so skillfully that the subject will act against his own best interests and according to another man’s wishes, all the while, firmly believing that his choice to do so is entirely his own.

Going back to the question of whose choice is it? … Those of us who have rejected and renounced the Quiverfull lifestyle are often quick to admit that we, the women, after much soul-searching, contemplation, bible study, and prayer, came to the Quiverfull conviction unconstrained by peer pressure, coercion, brainwashing, or blindly following “the commandments of men.”

We figured out this stuff for ourselves.

It’s been almost five years since I walked away from the ideology, and after carefully considering the myriad of subtle and not-so-subtle influences which converged to sway my thought processes – I am no longer absolutely certain that I was as much of an independent thinker as I had imagined.

I think it’s especially interesting to read the comments left by Quiverfull women who stumble across No Longer Quivering, read the FAQ: What is Quiverfull?, and feel a compulsion to defend their choices by explaining that, yes – they do not use birth control – BUT there are several items on the checklist which they do not personally believe or practice.  They will point out, for example, “we are trusting God with our family planning, but we are not legalistic about gender roles – our girls sometimes wear jeans and our boys know how to wash dishes.” or, “we have twelve children and are open to more, but we want our daughters to be well educated.” and, “we don’t use birth control, but I have a part-time job outside the home and we watch television.”

So you see, these women are not buying “the whole package” – they have carefully and thoughtfully chosen which of Vision Forum’s teachings are truly biblical and which are legalistic misinterpretations of the bible.

Intro | Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5

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Read everything by Vyckie Garrison!

Vyckie Garrison started No Longer Quivering to tell the story of her “escape” from the Quiverfull movement. Over time, NLQ has developed into a valuable resource of information regarding the deceptions and dangers of the Quiverfull philosophy and lifestyle. Several more former QF adherents are now contributing their stories to NLQ and our collective voice makes these Quiverfull warnings impossible to dismiss or ignore.

The Spiritual Abuse Survivor Blogs Network

NLQ Recommended Reading …

Breaking Their Will: Shedding Light on Religious Child Maltreatment‘ by Janet Heimlich

Quivering Daughters‘ by Hillary McFarland

Quiverfull: Inside the Christian Patriarchy Movement‘ by Kathryn Joyce

 

 

About Vyckie Garrison
  • http://calulu.blogspot.com Calulu

    We might figure it out on our own but who plants that initial seed? Where is the genesis of this thought process that leads to possession and pain? Gotta come from somewhere other than our own minds.

  • Lisa

    There’s a great video on YouTube by Darkmatter2525 called “The Real God: An Epiphany.” /watch?v=-j8ZMMuu7MU&feature=plcp
    Setting aside the theological argument he presents, it’s interesting to jump ahead to about 5:30, where he talks about belief. He says something very intriguing, which seems to be pretty near to what you’re hinting at. He basically says that we don’t choose to believe or disbelieve in something. Rather, we are compelled to believe the things we are convinced are true. So, you and other Quiverful women were not choosing to reject birth control simply because you viewed it as the more appealing option. Rather, you were compelled to reject it (and accept the QF/CP lifestyle) because Mary Pride et al convinced you they were right.
    Honestly, after seeing that video, reading “Blink” by Malcolm Gladwell and learning more about how advertisers influence our thinking, I don’t really believe in free will the way I used to. Dr. Pat Love wrote once “We make the best choices we can with the information we have and the options we see available to us.” If a person argues compellingly enough to convince us that our options are limited to jumping through a series of God-approved hoops, how can we say anything but “Yes ma’am, how high?”

  • Pingback: Mama’s Choice – Part 7: Free Agents

  • Shadow Spring

    This is the amazing thing about the human animal: the ability to communicate to others and sway their opinions. Certainly we are all influenced by our environment, the place and times in which we live, and certainly we all have a unique genetic springboard in which all these environmental influences are processed. Both the atheist and the devout religious Calvinist believe no one has free will: one is the product of biology and environment, the other is the pawn of predestination. I believe that our biology has given us the capacity to respond to our environment by means of our biology: a free will which we all most certainly do exercise daily. I also believe that God created this open-ended, dynamic universe, but not that any God micromanages the choices that living things make. We are both 100% responsible for our choices, and completely powerless over the environment we are born into, the initial arrangement of our genes and the interplay of genes and environment. But that’s where this amazing ability to communicate comes in: we can acquire knowledge and be influenced by other’s experience and understanding, and that is certainly a choice one makes.


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