Millipede Part 31 – How Did I Get Here Part 2

by Millipede

The path to Patriarchy is often a convoluted one. Embracing of Patriarchal beliefs is usually not the original intent, but is often the “byproduct” of one’s attempt to embrace a particular religion and/ or ideology.

This is important to remember, few women are quick to jump on a bandwagon which promotes a society in which women have few or no rights. However, finding themselves presented with a series of agreeable answers to various concerns will act as a compass which eventually leads the seeker to a particular brand of patriarchy.

In more down to earth terms, proponents of patriarchy know they have a tough sell. After all, what woman in their right of mind is going to embrace a system of terminal submission? For the proponent of Patriarchy, it’s sort of like being the frosted covered turd salesman at the ice cream convention. How is one to compete?

Unlike the frosted covered turd salesman however, the Patriarch (or female acolyte) is a true believer. In his mind, Patriarchy is a tough sell due to the fallen state of today’s society, not because of any shortcomings of the system itself. His answer is that in a Godly society, women would be delighted to fulfill God’s Will for their gender.The modern day aspiring Patriarch knows though, that he has an uphill battle and that subtler, more crafty approach is called for.

The task is thus to convince the modern day woman to embrace her role in a Patriarchal system. In doing this the proponent of Patriarchy uses both sweetness and intimidation to alternately woo and coerce women (and to a certain degree men) into accepting Patriarchy.

It brings to my mind some seasoned pimp trying to pick up a young runaway at the bus station. Everyone knows that the pimp has bad intentions, but somehow, he must get the girl trapped into his racket.

He would never start out with the reality of his plans. “Hey honey, I’m going to force you to sell yourself, take your money, beat you and make you a slave.”

Of course not, more than likely he would pretend to be a good Samaritan and offer the girl food, some money and maybe even a place to stay. These are all good and helpful things that someone in her situation would need. If the pimp is smart enough, he will offer these things in such away as not to raise suspicion, not making things seems “too good”.
If the girl accepts first set of gifts, then the pimp offers her something bigger, such as a place to stay. All the time he claims that he’s “there to help”. In reality he is getting her in his debt. The more she accepts, the more she will feel beholden to him.

Sooner or later the picture shatters, maybe it’s the first time that he beats her or forces her to do something. Either way, it’s ugly and it’s definitely NOT something good for her.

A woman embracing Patriarchy follows a similar path. In the beginning it’s all good and fun. In fact, it rarely starts out about women submitting. Like the offers of free food or a place to stay, women are lured into Patriarchy with offers of “restoring the good old days”, “a Godly society”, “Living by the Bible” and other kindred lines. Patriarchy doesn’t rear it’s ugly head until later on.

By then it’s too late. Through her pursuit of a dream, she was carefully guided to a situation where she must to be religiously consistent, embrace aspects of Patriarchy. At first, it’s just a few things…

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9

| Part 10| Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 |

Part 14 | Part 15 | Part 16 | Part 17| Part 18

| Part 19 | Part 20 | Part 21 | Part 22 | Part 23 | Part 24 | Part 25 |

Part 26 | Part 27 | Part 28 | Part 29 | Part 30

Comments open below

Read everything by Millipede!

NLQ Recommended Reading …

Breaking Their Will: Shedding Light on Religious Child Maltreatment‘ by Janet Heimlich

Quivering Daughters‘ by Hillary McFarland

Quiverfull: Inside the Christian Patriarchy Movement‘ by Kathryn Joyce

 

About Suzanne Calulu
  • wanderer

    very interesting analogy… thank you for this.

  • http://mimitabby.com mimi

    you forgot the part about “if the bible tells me so it must be true” which segues into “if the pastor tells me so it’s true.” A large part of my family believe that the man is the head of the family and that his opinion trumps his wife. It’s pathetic how self-righteous they are. These women happily give up their adult responsibilities, but there are payoffs for that too.

  • madame

    Mimi,
    This statement: “these women happily give up their adult responsibilities” is very, very true. And for me, Patriarchy was a way to bypass my responsibilities as an adult. Truly growing up and becoming responsible for one’s decisions should precede marriage and definitely childbearing, but I know from experience that this is not always the case. Women leave their father’s authority, with protection and provision, often even from having to make decisions, and get under the authority, provision and protection of the man their father gave “green light” to.
    Like the pimp offering the girl a place to stay, Patriarchy may very well offer a woman who feels overwhelmed when faced with normal adult decisions the way out. Submit to your husband and switch off your brain. You don’t need to grow up.
    Men do this too, always seeking their father’s, pastor’s or church elder’s approval for every decision. Patriarchy and authoritarian parenting doesn’t allow for responsible mistake making, which is essential to growing up BEFORE one’s decisions and mistakes will affect people under their protection.

  • Pressing On

    This is one of the most disturbing aspects of the patriarchy movement. At first it sounds so good, and then the crazy stuff begins. At first I half bought in myself, but now I don’t. Last week I heard a proponent talking about how automatic washing machines contribute to the divorce rate. “We” women have more free time because of them, and we get pulled off into things that lead to divorce. Mmm…somehow I think that it is more complicated than that.

  • Pingback: Millipede: Part 38 How Did I Get Here? Part 9


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