Quoting Quiverfull: HSLDA Tips?

From the HSLDA website and written by Chris Klicka – Tips towards handling a CPS investigation

Never let the social worker in your house without a warrant or a court order.

Never let the social worker talk to your children alone without a court order.

Inform your church, and put the investigation on your prayer chain. Over and over again HSLDA has seen God deliver homeschoolers from this scary scenario.

Comments open below

QUOTING QUIVERFULL is a regular feature of NLQ – we present the actual words of noted Quiverfull leaders and ask our readers: What do you think? Agree? Disagree? This is the place to state your opinion. Please, let’s keep it respectful – but at the same time, we encourage readers to examine the ideas of Quiverfull honestly and thoughtfully.

NLQ Recommended Reading …

Breaking Their Will: Shedding Light on Religious Child Maltreatment‘ by Janet Heimlich

Quivering Daughters‘ by Hillary McFarland

Quiverfull: Inside the Christian Patriarchy Movement‘ by Kathryn Joyce

 

About Suzanne Calulu
  • http://alisoncummins.com Alison Cummins

    What’s the scary scenario?

    • Nea

      Your kids being loose from your control, apparently.

      • madame

        It’s not just control, Nea.
        Good parents, who love their children and try to provide the best environment for them, would feel threatened if CPS came knocking on their door. Just the thought of it is unsettling.

        • Persephone

          Unfortunately, false complaints have been made to CPS about many families as part of revenge or other issues.

    • madame

      If I opened the door to CPS, unannounced, I think my heart would start beating hard enough to jump out of my chest. Why would anyone want to investigate MY family? WHO called them? WHY?

      Alison, do you have children?
      To someone without children, it can seem like a non-issue having an agency show concern for the youngest and most defenseless citizens. It’s different when that agency decides to investigate your family. I know I’d feel very insecure.

  • http://alisoncummins.com Alison Cummins

    Madame, I don’t have children but I have two adopted sibs. They lived with us before the adoptions went through and until then we got regular visits from social workers. My sibs spoke with their social workers alone, which we thought was completely appropriate though of course we would all have *liked* to listen in the conversations.

    The cops stopped in to check up on my aunt who was passed out inside the house when the neighbours called about my two year old neice playing by herself outside the house (no fencing). This was an occasion of a certain amount of self-righteous indignation on the part of my (angry, violated, defensive and invaded-feeling) aunt and others, but it was also a wake-up call.

    There are lots of things that feel very bad and invasive, but feeling bad and invasive doesn’t necessarily make it wrong. If the cops come to your door because the neighbours have called the cops about the angry fighting noises coming from your house you will feel angry, violated, defensive and invaded. If a social worker goes to your house because the neighbours have called the cops because you talk aggressively to yourself, making long, unintelligible speeches; the house and garden are not maintained; the place stinks; and now you are heaping garbage around your door and not putting it out for collection — you are going to feel angry, violated, defensive and invaded. It’s not uncommon for women to feel angry, violated, defensive and invaded when a doctor tells them that their baby’s life is at risk and they should seriously consider a c-section.

    Social workers want to keep families together. Their goal is to keep people safe, and if they can do that while keeping a family together they are thrilled.

    Above, what people feel angry, violated, defensive and invaded about is that the social worker has been called and has stopped by. Of course, anyone would feel bad. I get that. If you want to stop feeling bad quickly, let them in to talk to your kids and just get it over with. If you want to escalate the bad feelings into paranoia, make a big deal about it and drag it out for years.

    • madame

      Alison,
      I agree with you. You asked “what’s the scary scenario?”, and I replied that the scenario can sure be scary to parents.

      We had two situations where the police came to search our home (in the UK). Once, they were looking for a man that our church had taken under her wing. He had been staying in a caravan behind the church, so it seemed logical that we could have hidden him somewhere in the flat we lived in upstairs from the church.
      The police had a warrant to search the church premises and they decided to search upstairs in our flat, too.
      My husband didn’t want to let them in because their warrant didn’t include searching our home, and it felt like a violation. The situation escalated and my husband ended up in the police station!
      Years later, I had the police at my door with a warrant to search our flat looking for something. It was an unsettling situation, but I let them in, and they were fine with me calling a friend and asking him over for moral support and as an extra witness to anything that might happen (I had two very little children at the time)

      I agree with cooperating with the police and social services. They are doing a job, however scary it may seem when they come to do their job in your home.

    • http://saralinwilde.wordpress.com Sara Lin Wilde

      I used to live with my husband (now ex-husband) in a third-floor apartment of a three-floor low-rise, and the people below us called the police more than once because of our fighting. I’m not sure if it was a noise complaint or if they were concerned about domestic violence . . . but I do know the calls always took place after there had been something physical going on that they might have heard. At the time I felt indignant and violated and defensive. How dare they involve the cops in my family life? Didn’t it matter what I wanted? Because of course, I was already feeling that what I wanted didn’t matter; it sure didn’t matter when my husband was shoving me around. That coloured my point of view.

      But the involvement of the police was also part of the long process of recognizing that something was not right in this marriage. In a way it became validating later on, when I started to contemplate leaving. I wasn’t just a crazy person objecting to normal marital fighting, expecting a perfect husband and refusing to settle for anything less. Other people had thought the fights sounded violent enough to involve the police. This wasn’t just a normal part of being married.

      Not sure how that relates to the issue of CPS, exactly, except to say that for a person who’s faced abusers in the past, I found the HSLDA advice deeply chilling.

  • K

    I have an even better tip for people who dont want their kids to be taken away by CPS. Dont beat them.

  • Oh Mama!

    We’ve had CPS in our home on numerous occasions, most notably when a teacher called them about a bruise on my child’s face. They were very professional, and so were the folks at the kid-friendly evaluation center, and everyone else who followed up. I thanked the teacher for caring enough to do the right thing. Most recently they came after an anonymous call the same day I had locked a child out of the house for aggressive behavior against people and things. If I had seen a child carrying on the way he did, actung like he was dying, I would have called too. Again, very professional. BTW, my husband and I weren’t home when they came in to interview the kids. They were very calm and not one of them mentioned what happened that morning, including that child, who was perfectly fine. I’m actually the one who brought it up because I figured that’s why they were there. They hadn’t heard specifics and my explanation was obviously plausible. My advice: Play it straight. Don’t act defensive. Don’t be weird about it. Ask for help if you need it. Thank them for their concern. They aren’t monsters.

    • madame

      Oh mama,
      That is very good advice.
      I hope I can keep my calm if they should ever show up, and just let them do their job.

      I’ve given this post a bit more thought, and I think the HSLDA’s advice is the worst you can give. Of course, if you have a plumbing pipe in every room, you have a good reason to fear CPS!


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