Quoting Quiverfull: Benefits of Having Older Children?

by Zsuzsanna Anderson of Are They All Yours? – The Benefits and Pitfalls of Scheduling

Having older children is a great asset for many reasons:
  • They help set a pattern: When you have two parents and four older children all following a consistent schedule, the younger ones simply fall in line themselves, assuming it’s just the way things are.
  • They help offset interruptions: While the inevitable emergencies occur just as much as ever, I now have older ones to either help me deal with them, or carry on whatever I am supposed to be doing while I fix the problem. Example: unexpected diaper change during Bible time – one of the older boys can keep reading out loud, while I change the diaper.
  • They are self-motivated: Allotting a certain time for a certain activity can quickly become a source of frustration with young children. “Hurry up and finish dinner, we got a late start on the meal and you only have 5 minutes left” is just too much to ask of a young child. Older ones, however, will on their own read the clock, assess where they are at vs. where they are supposed to be at, and take pride in being responsible and helpful.
  • They help get the work done: With only young children, when mom is the one to do the vast majority of work around the house, there are more things that need to get done, than there are hours in the day to do them. Planned neglect has to become a way of life. The areas that need to be neglected on any particular day cannot be scheduled ahead, but rather are based on the necessity of the moment. I remember distinctly that the first time I tried to work out a schedule like this, I struggled for a full week trying to cram everything into the 15 minute slots, only to realize I needed about 26 hours in each day, not counting breaks for myself. Now, I have older children to help shoulder the work load, and I can delegate many of my chores.

Comments open below

QUOTING QUIVERFULL is a regular feature of NLQ – we present the actual words of noted Quiverfull leaders and ask our readers: What do you think? Agree? Disagree? This is the place to state your opinion. Please, let’s keep it respectful – but at the same time, we encourage readers to examine the ideas of Quiverfull honestly and thoughtfully.

NLQ Recommended Reading …

Breaking Their Will: Shedding Light on Religious Child Maltreatment‘ by Janet Heimlich

Quivering Daughters‘ by Hillary McFarland

Quiverfull: Inside the Christian Patriarchy Movement‘ by Kathryn Joyce

 

About Suzanne Calulu
  • http://yllommormon.blogspot.com/ aletha

    Hate to break it to the author, but having only young children is kind of a precursor to having some older children.

  • Meyli

    Nothing wrong with having the older kids help the little ones. The problem is when household chores and babysitting becomes the majority of what those older kids do. They need school, extracurriculars, and personal time that does not include being responsible for siblings.
    Ugh…..

  • Monika Jankun-Kelly

    It never occurs to the author that trying to do way too much, having unrealistic expectations of what should be accomplished, could possibly be the problem. She understands she needed 26 hours in a day without breaks, and it still doesn’t click.

  • texcee

    When you have lots of both older and younger kids (like Michelle Duggar), you can turn everything over to your older daughters while you and hubby retire to the bedroom and procreate like rabbits to add yet another one to your brood.

    • Trollface McGee

      It’s disgusting. They rant about teenage parents and taking responsibility. They make their kids into de facto teen parents which is just about as irresponsible as one can get.

  • Mel

    “Hurry up and finish dinner, we got a late start on the meal and you only have 5 minutes left”

    Or else what? I’ve always thought the advantage of having one parent at home was that you could adapt the schedule to meet the needs of the family.

    • Baby_Raptor

      Kids aren’t supposed to have needs that inconvenience the parents. That’s “rebellion” and “disobeying.”

      • Mel

        Ahh…. thank you for that important, if terrifying, clarification.

  • http://biblicalpersonhood.wordpress.com/ Retha Faurie

    “Example: unexpected diaper change during Bible time – one of the older boys can keep reading out loud, while I change the diaper.” I notice this is the only place where she mentions a gender of the older children. Are older girls not up to Bible reading? (Not taught to be literate, or perhaps a girl may not read Bible to a boy in her gender role view?)

    • Mel

      I wondered that too. I looked on her blog. Her oldest kids (11,10 and 8) are all boys. Her oldest daughter is 6. I don’t know that her oldest daughter could read fluently out-loud yet.

      • http://biblicalpersonhood.wordpress.com/ Retha Faurie

        That explains it. I am glad to hear it is not yet another thing that belittles girls.