A Love That Multiplies Part 1 – Little Eyes Watching

by Calulu cross posted from her blog True Love Doesn’t Rape

Introduction

Chapter 1 – Little Eyes Watching: Psalm 127:2 – ‘Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord and the fruit of the is his reward’

The start of this chapter gave me one the biggest laughs I’ve had in a long time. Psalm 127:2 actually reads – ‘It is useless for you to work so hard from early morning until late at night, anxiously working for food to eat; for God gives rest to his loved ones.’

I think what the Duggars were aiming for was Psalm 127:3 It makes me wonder exactly who edited this book. Was it their children? Crackheads on the street? Or just monkeys with keyboards? Freudian slip? How does something that glaringly wrong get through? I even spotted it and I stopped reading and memorizing scripture ages ago.

“We believe that children are a blessing from God”

I think it sort of sets the tone for this chapter. Michelle starts off by explaining how they’d decided to stop all birth control and let the crowd be created followed by cooing about blessings and joys and such having to do with having such a large number of children. Followed by saying how they’ve had hardships like everyone else.

But faith and prayer get them through, no mention of the hefty financial contributions towards their family by The Learning Channel. The same television channel that paid to finish their home, plucked them from obscurity, and an old small three bedroom rental. TLC turned the Duggars into an established money-making brand.

Also the Duggars never mention that money does tend to smooth out many of the bumps in the road. Don’t believe me? Just try living through the crisis of Josie Duggar’s birth and many moons of medical care without having insurance and a serious amount of moolah.

Michelle and Jim Bob say that they wrote this book because of the oodles of emails, letters and questions they get every day, that people from all walks of life like what they see. So the book is supposed to answer those questions and share how they got through 2009 together.

The interesting thing to me about Michelle and Jim Bob answering ‘questions’ about their family, parenting practices et al is that with every different special, series, book released they feel compelled to ‘explain’ away things they have taken public heat for. This is typical for fundamentalists, the fundy must ALWAYS be RIGHT every single time. There’s no self introspection, no learning from anyone else not within their own cultic sphere.

Remember when Michelle Duggar explained during the first television special using Michael Pearl’s discipline method of ‘blanket training’ babies? Swatting a baby with a wooden spoon if it would not stay content on it’s blanket? All mention gone now, edited out along with many other things.

“One of the most frequent comments was that we’d never experienced “real life,” with all its hardships, challenges, setbacks, and pain”

Sure, Michelle and Jim Bob might have experienced “real life” but the Duggar children have been sheltered a ridiculous amount. They’ve never really had to deal any thing harsher than all those kids sharing one bath in their old house. They’re kept away from everything people must learn to deal with in life, like peer pressure, how to handle a plethora of situations that most kids learn early on. I know the Duggar parents think they are helping their kids by sheltering them from anything off the compound but in reality they are delaying the maturation.

No one residing in the Fundigelical world bubble experiences life as most in the world do. They talk the Fundigelical talk, view natural consequences as ‘tests of faith’ from God and often fail to take necessary steps to resolve a challenge until it reaches crisis-proportions.

“We’re not parenting experts”

What they’ve been through with first Josie and later Jubilee has done what terrible things usually do to religious people, make them cling ever tighter to their beliefs.

One thing that is common with everyone going to those type of hard times impacted the Duggars too, it’s made them value their family and home more. They even said they no longer take health for granted, but you’re never know that if you saw their ABC News interview last week. Michelle and Jim Bob both said they are trying for another baby, obviously that last lesson didn’t stick.

Comments open below

Read everything by Calulu!

Calulu lives near Washington DC , was raised Catholic in South Louisiana before falling in with a bunch of fallen Catholics whom had formed their own part Fundamentalist, part Evangelical church. After fifteen uncomfortable years drinking that Koolaid she left nearly 6 years ago. Her blogs are True Love Doesn’t Rape and  Calulu – Seeking The Light

NLQ Recommended Reading …

Breaking Their Will: Shedding Light on Religious Child Maltreatment‘ by Janet Heimlich

Quivering Daughters‘ by Hillary McFarland

Quiverfull: Inside the Christian Patriarchy Movement‘ by Kathryn Joyce

 


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  • persephone

    It is amazing the amount of memory loss that regularly occurs with fundagelicals. I’ve brought up the tiny rental home, broken down cars, etc. that were obvious the first season of the TV show and immediately the true believers jump in and call me a liar. I only watched a few episodes to see what the hype was about, then mostly quit watching, but I definitely remember the tiny house, and that it was being sold out from under the Duggars. Also, they tried to go on a family trip and the mini-bus broke down, and it was implied that this was a regular thing. One set of parents drove out and helped with getting the repairs done and getting them on their way. It was extremely obvious that the Duggars were living over the edge financially.

    They’re paid $185,000 an episode, plus TLC pays for those trips in the specials. They are a major cash cow for TLC. The true believers buy into the Calvinism that the Duggars are blessed by god and that is why they have no money problems. Jim Bob and Michelle know that they can’t support themselves without the TLC money, so they’re the biggest publicity whores the network has.

    I admit that I sometimes get in a mood and set off the true believers just to watch them freak out.

  • Nea

    I wonder if continuing to “try for another blessing” is entirely due to their quiverfull beliefs or if there isn’t a very large consideration that once the kids stop coming, the ratings will start the inevitable slide into oblivion. The Duggars are hooked on that money now, and fame addicts to boot. I doubt anyone in that family will know what to do when the cameras go off for the last tme, especially the kids who’ve been followed their whole lives.

  • persephone

    There’s no way they could adjust to not having that money rolling in. I have no idea how much they’ve actually saved.
    The kids will be the ones in shock, because they’re used to having this money, not really working, and not really worrying about the future, and I’m sure Jim Bob and Michelle don’t plan to share, especially not with the girls.

  • Nea

    I have no idea how much they’ve actually saved.

    How much could be left to save after they pay for all the kids and the medical bills?

    The kids, especially the older and middle ones, are going to be beyond shock. They’ve grown up believing in the cameras and their significance. When-not-if that cuts off, their whole world is going to be shaken to the foundation.

  • Trollface McGee

    The entire premise of that show is them popping out baby after baby, I don’t think the grandparent Duggars will have much appeal – then again, they’ve made enough money, their sons are pretty much guaranteed a job at a conservative think tank or “news” organisation – and the girls, meh they’ll marry or something.

  • Nea

    I don’t know. Lobbying jobs depend on a functioning government, and Josh isn’t proving to be a particularly big draw or important speaker that I know of. The younger sons are going to be up the creek – or possibly, in the case of the youngest, saved because the cameras will cut off before their whole life warps around them. As for the girls – it looks like one might get out, but no TV means no secondary fame for a potential hubby.

  • Trollface McGee

    Very true. I think people in general are getting fed up with the tea party fundiecrat values – but then again a lot of fundies exist in a vaccuum, surrounded by their own news and facts and at roughly 15-20% of the population, it’s a sizeable market.
    Of course, if all else fails they could resort to the last resort of the formerly famous – book deals or has-been reality shows – at least that should provide them enough money to get out of that lifestyle should they want to.

  • Lauren Borrero

    This has nothing to do with the tea party it has more to do with them and their reality show. Come to think of it the Duggars never said anything about the tea party from what I racall.

  • Trollface McGee

    Jim Bob just stumped for fundie/teaparty candidate, wannabe sex banner Ken Cuccinelli. One of his sons works for the FRC who promotes core tea party causes.
    Their quiverful and political ideology are very intertwined.

  • Lauren Borrero

    Meh I don’t see it. I don’t think the tea party is everything the media says it is because I can’t see that many people thinking the same way. I’m sure there are reasonable tea party members who don’t have a Quiverfull way of thinking. But hey to each their own.

  • Trollface McGee

    It isn’t “many people” it is a large vocal minority that is about 10-20% of the country and just because you don’t see something doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. No, quiverful isn’t a central part of the tea party movement but I would wager most of the quiverful people would support the tea party in it’s current form.

  • texcee

    Jim Bob was a speaker at the recent Values Voters thing in Washington, where Ted Cruz was the featured speaker and was heckled.

  • Nea

    They’re stumping for a far-right conservative candidate who has courted the tea party vote.

  • texcee

    OMG, just had a horrifying vision — the Duggars — all of them — showing up on “Family Feud”!!

  • Nea

    Partnering each other on Hoofing with the Has Beens, I mean Dancing with the Stars.

  • Nea

    Followup comment – right now my Facebook feed is gleefully passing around Jim Bob completely flubbing his endorsement of Cuccinelli, with a side order of “if there are 19 kids at home in AK, who’s raising them when their parents are on the stump in a different state?” Not to mention that the Tea Party is now violently unpopular in Virginia and Maryland, as two of the states most affected by the furlough. So “My name is Duggar, I’ve got a TV show, vote for who I say” is fast dropping past “I’m a Karashian, I’ve got a TV show, vote for who I say” as political pull.

  • Trollface McGee

    Perhaps we’ll see them all as guest-stars on Family Feud after all.

  • Suzanne Harper Titkemeyer

    They would at least be easy to beat at any game show except maybe a Bible based one.

  • Suzanne Harper Titkemeyer

    Nea~ Did Jim Bob flub it? I was supposed to be at one of the events but apparently got the wrong ‘Calvary’ church. Who knew there would be a pile of churches with that name in my area? I went to the wrong one. Still kicking;myself until I saw the photos in the paper of Michelle gazing adoringly at a getting flabbier by the moment Jim Bob. I likely would have started to projectile vomit if I was in the same area as them. Read that the turnout was rather weak for that sized city filled with homeschoolers.

  • Nea

    I don’t know if he got a clean shot out; the footage on Facebook had him mangling names (of both candidates) so often that Michelle told him to skip one and say “his opponent.”

  • Suzanne Harper Titkemeyer

    I found a copy of the first Duggar special on Youtube – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I5nGQE-pqnI&list=PLKy-pDoM25LQ0K1usN1-nZZz5WxV6Vrhk Just point the disbelieving to it, complete with tiny home and countenance enhancing big collars and one bathroom…

  • Madame

    Thanks for sharing that, Suzanne. I had never seen that episode. I’ve only seen two, which were aired on German TV a few years ago. Now I can catch up! hahaha!

    There’s one thing you have to give Jimbob. He’s a shrew businessman and an opportunist. There’s nothing wrong with that, but a lot of families watching and wondering how to make it work, don’t have a parent with those traits. My father was none of the two, and we never left the three bedroom apartment with one bathroom (just under 90 sq.m). o

    I don’t understand how this family is fine with exposing such intimate details of their lives, like the c-section birth of a child, for the whole nation to see. As others have mentioned before, it bears questioning: what is the driving force of this family’s continued reproduction? It looks a lot more like feeding the TV-show than “building the Kingdom”.

  • Nea

    I’ll grant him opportunist, but not shrewd businessman. If he was good at business he wouldn’t have to sell his children to TV for money.

  • Madame

    Yes, granted. But selling your kids AND making it look “pious” in the eyes of all their Christian admirers and wannabes is quite shrewd, I think!

  • Saraquill

    That they made an error with biblical citations makes me wonder about the piety they talk long and loud about.

  • fiona64

    There comes a point when it is time to *stop* having children. Micro-preemie followed by stillbirth in the wake of 19 kids is, IMO, long *past* the time to take the hint from Mother Nature.

    However, as has been pointed out by other commenters, the Duggars are basically publicity whores at this point. Feh.

  • Madame

    Living in Europe I haven’t seen much of the Duggar Show. I watched a couple episodes that were aired here, but they were nothing offensive. A trip and a documentary about them and their beliefs.

    I’ve just watched some snippets of a lot more personal information, like Michelle finding out she had miscarried and Anna giving birth to her son. Do these people stop at anything? It feels wrong!
    I keep thinking, how is Anna going to feel about having shared such intimate experiences of her life when she moves away from Duggarland?

    I think Jimbob is sick. So much for being the “provider and protector” and “head of his family”. Yuck!