Quoting Quiverfull: How to Attract a Righteous Guy’s Attention?

by The Author (guest post) at Integrity of the Home: Quirks of the Fairer Sex Which Ought Not be So

I could be wrong, but I think an idea prevalent in so-called “reformed” circles among you young ladies is this: guys don’t notice you all, so you have to look “cute” or act a certain way to get attention. Maybe you’ll be at church, or perhaps a nice conference, but you’ll stand there and observe (out of the corner of your eye, of course) all us guys bumble around like blind fellows, consumed with our football or movies, never noticing you in all your reformed, youthful splendor.

First, you’re thinking the wrong way. In the first place, you shouldn’t be worrying about whether or not we notice you; because if you are, you have the wrong priorities and focus (Matthew 6:33).

Second, it’s not true that we don’t notice you. We do. Trust me, I’m a guy. I would know. We definitely aren’t blind. That said, I’ll let you in on a little secret. You don’t have to wear cute clothes. You don’t have to have sassy glasses. You don’t have to act flirty. You don’t have to have a camera or a violin. And you “don’t” have to have an hourglass figure.

(That said, this does “not” mean you can’t dress fashionably. Please don’t swing to an extreme and think I’m exhorting you to dress in sackcloth or be “frumpy”—that’s “not” what I’m trying to convey. “Do” dress with excellence, as unto the Lord. We do love beauty and femininity.)

You know how to really be attractive? Be a godly woman. Take Proverbs 31 to heart. Take Titus 2 to heart:

“But speak thou the things which become sound doctrine…The aged women likewise, that they be in behavior as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; that they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.”

Have a gravity and sobriety to your demeanor that marks a mature woman and brings glory to your Heavenly Father and your earthly parents. Be sober. Be joyful, but not foolish. Be level-headed. Be chaste in dress and attitude, not sexy in some sort of “reformed” way. Be friendly. Have a handle on your tongue. (See points #1, #2, and #4.) Be a student of the Word. Love God. Love your father. Love your mother. Love your siblings—both biological *and* spiritual. Be humble. Be a hard worker, a servant. Love children. Be the one who’s willing to go unnoticed to do a job nobody else wants to do.

“But let it [a woman's true beauty] be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.” — 1 Peter 3:4

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QUOTING QUIVERFULL is a regular feature of NLQ – we present the actual words of noted Quiverfull leaders and ask our readers: What do you think? Agree? Disagree? This is the place to state your opinion. Please, let’s keep it respectful – but at the same time, we encourage readers to examine the ideas of Quiverfull honestly and thoughtfully.

NLQ Recommended Reading …

Breaking Their Will: Shedding Light on Religious Child Maltreatment‘ by Janet Heimlich

Quivering Daughters‘ by Hillary McFarland

Quiverfull: Inside the Christian Patriarchy Movement‘ by Kathryn Joyce

 

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