Questioning the Pearls – Boys Bullying Each Other?

Questioning the Pearls – Boys Bullying Each Other? February 19, 2017

QuestioningthePearlsFor well over a year we’ve been running a second Answering β€˜Preparing To Be A Help Meet’ on Sundays, filled with questions by young ladies trying to get ready for marriage. Since we’ve run through many of the questions on their site it’s time to shift Sundays to something else, like perhaps examining the cornucopia of probably fake emails and questions that Michael and Debi Pearl of No Greater Joy post on their website and the possibly poisonous answers they give.

Question and answer can be found here.

First the question, a long one condensed down to a few paragraphs.

Our son is seven years old. As soon as church lets out, the boys, young and old, are running around on the deck, out in the street, jumping on each other, and many times the β€œplay” gets out of hand. In recent weeks things have escalated into what can almost be described as full-fledged gang war between the older and the younger boys. The older boys taunt the younger ones; the younger ones start chasing and jumping on the older ones, and someone gets hurt. We seem to be the only ones at our church that show any concern over this situation.

Many times we find ourselves intervening. Two weeks ago after an evening meeting I came around the side of the church building to find a group of five 10-13 year old boys around our son with one of them holding my son’s neck from behind and smashing his face into the wall. The β€œmama bear” definitely came out in me and I jumped in. The older boys stated that our son had been jumping on them, etc. (which our son did confess to) but in retaliation our son had been ruffed up pretty badly.

But here recently, when our son gets around other boys he goes a bit nuts, me too. This has all come on us so suddenly that it has really caught us off guard. We would greatly appreciate any suggestions you have to offer.

And Michael Pearl replies. Again we had to condense down his advice. Please go to the link above to read the entire thing.

In this area your concerns are natural and justifiable, but, if I am reading you correctly, you have complicated the problems of male youth with a common feminine over-sensitivity.

If mama bears had their way baby bears would always be little biting bullies with no understanding of social give and take. Puppies, bears and kids learn not to bite by getting bit in return. Mamas who run interference for their little boys do two things: 1) they make weak sons, 2) they cause the other kids to continue picking on the β€˜bratty’ little boy with the β€˜meddling’ mama.

Your son would have been better left alone. He admitted attacking the bigger fellow. A little thrashing from the big boys would teach him the limits.

The unquoted part is Mr. Pearl waxing most eloquently on the beast-like adrenaline junkie nature of boys.

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