Preparing For Young Marriage and Not Marrying – Left on the Shelf

Preparing For Young Marriage and Not Marrying – Left on the Shelf February 10, 2018

Ladies Against Feminism and Chalcedon have been pushing that bedrock idea in Quiverfull that girls are to get married as soon as possible after completion of homeschooling. No college, no higher education of any sort. Marry, have babies. But in the meantime learn how to be a housewife. Newsflash: It’s just not that hard to learn how to cook and clean. But it seems like many are still not marrying.

Chalcedon has a humble brag article titled ‘You’re Gonna What?’ concerning a young lady crowing to the crowd that she’s leaving school to prepare for marriage and that the listeners were pretty horrified, even in their church group.

I guess the author does not mind leaving her daughter without the necessary money-making skills that college might provide, essentially sentencing her daughter and future grandchildren to poverty if something happens to this as of yet imaginary husband. Seems short-sided to not consider that while waiting it might benefit her daughter to have something no one can take from her – an education.

That’s if this Godly Prince Charming ever shows up. Too many times we’ve seen families where the father rejects ever possible suitor as not good enough, keeping the unmarried daughters in his household as unpaid household help for many years.

There’s nothing wrong with being married or not married. There’s no law that demands you marry. It’s just not for everyone and there’s no shame in deciding not to marry. The problem in Quiverfull seems to be that you’re required to marry, but given zero say over the who and when while being isolated from situations and people that might lead to marriage.

Lately I’ve been wondering what has happened to the Botkin sisters, Anna Sophia and Elizabeth Botkin. They’d not married, another year has passed without a Godly suitor anywhere on the horizon. They haven’t updated their website, written and published a new book, or tried to teach another online course on making yourselves beautiful enough to catch a man. Not even any blogging in nearly a year now.

I did see this from nearly a year ago where the ladies pondered waiting in a piece titled ‘Should I Keep Preparing For Marriage, or is it Time to Start Preparing For a Single Life’ :

The Botkin sisters go on to explain that you’re focusing too much on getting married and not a relationship with the Lord or advancing the kingdom, largely useless advice. What they should do, and advise their followers is to get daddy out of the picture, leave, but then again these are women without education or marketable skills so leaving the home to have a genuine life of their own choosing and finding someone to love is impossible. Just like their fathers planned it.

It has to be enormously frustrating to be told your sole role and purpose in life is to marry and have babies, yet to be held by from doing exactly that thing.


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