The Mary Crawfords of This World

Screen cap of Mary Crawford from the film "Mansfield Park"

by Nora Woodhouse cross posted from her blog A Heart Like MineEditor's note: The Mary Crawford that Nora is discussing in her blog is a character from Jane Austen's novel "Mansfield Park" An explanation of the character of Mary Crawford and quotes by Mary for those unfamiliar with the writings of  Jane Austen. An important part of recovery after leaving the world of QF to be able to recognize the toxic people in your path. … [Read more...]

Answering ‘Preparing To Be A Help Meet’ – I Don’t Like Him Anymore

Answering

Another installment of giving better answers to the questions asked at Debi Pearl’s site message board for the book ‘Preparing To Be A Help Meet’. Many young ladies ask questions on all sorts of different subjects brought up by the book. There was just one big problem, many of the answers stray into either the outright bad and emotionally unhealthy to dangerous. Yes, typical Debi Pearl borderline abusive. Here’s what we’re going to be doing here at NLQ. Every week, once or twice a week, I’ll be posting up one of the questions from the message board and ask you, our readers, to answer that poor soul’s question in a way that is logical, rational and the best possible solution, in other words 18 … [Read more...]

Answering ‘Preparing To Be A Help Meet’ – He Is Praying With Another Girl

Answering

Another installment of giving better answers to the questions asked at Debi Pearl’s site message board for the book ‘Preparing To Be A Help Meet’. Many young ladies ask questions on all sorts of different subjects brought up by the book. There was just one big problem, many of the answers stray into either the outright bad and emotionally unhealthy to dangerous. Yes, typical Debi Pearl borderline abusive. Here’s what we’re going to be doing here at NLQ. Every week, once or twice a week, I’ll be posting up one of the questions from the message board and ask you, our readers, to answer that poor soul’s question in a way that is logical, rational and the best possible solution, in other words 18 … [Read more...]

I Have No Roots

Image from Wide Open Ground

by Lana Hope cross posted from her blog Wide Open GroundWhen I left my fundamentalist upbringing behind, I left it all, all my roots, all my friends, all the things that connected me to the past.They say people need roots, but I have none.When I’m lonely, I have no where to turn, except to people of the moment. When people talk of old family Christmas traditions, I have none, or nearly none.When its Christmas break, I don’t fly to my parents because there is no Christmas there. When the semester ends, I go camping, not to visit old friends. When I’m lonely, I write in a foreign language on my FB. … [Read more...]

An Open Letter To My Former High School Teachers

Sarahhenderson

by Sarah Henderson cross posted from her blog Feminist in Spite of ThemDear Teachers,                                                                                            October 15, 2013When I came to the high school at age 17, I had absolutely no idea how to be a student.  Many of you know by now that I had didn't know what a teacher-student dynamic was. I hope you understand that up to that point I had been around adults who mostly made stuff up as they went along, and expected respect from authority that was derived simply from being bigger and older, not from legitimate accomplishment. To a scared 17 year old, it looked the same at first, because of the authority aspect. In … [Read more...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Hot Jesus Eyes!??

quotingquiverfull

by Paula Hendricks from Lies Young Women Believe - Christ or Crush?Editor's note: Thanks for pointing this one out Bruce Gerencser! Didn't know if it should be a 'Quoting Quiverfull' or a 'Laughter is Good Medicine' on NLQ because it's funny as can be with the original author thinking it's serious and good advice. I don't want to think about Jesus as 'The Hot Guy'. Ick factor infinity! … [Read more...]

Boiling The Frog – When Churches Turn Into Dangerous Cults

Image from Amazon - This is a book we studied during the oddest part of my church years.

by Suzanne Titkemeyer cross posted from her blog What Would Roger Sterling Do?I'm going to ask you to stop and read this first before proceeding onto my story of how weird the church and I got towards the end - The Seven Signs You're in a Cult in The Atlantic MagazineGot it? Yep.What happened was sort of like that old beloved in Christianity false story about putting the frog in a big pot of water and the frog not realizing till it was too late that he was being boiled alive. Our church turning into a cult happened a lot like that. … [Read more...]

My Level of Commitment Cannot Exceed Yours

Ellen

by Ellen cross posted from her blog When Church HurtsA few nights ago, one of the folks from our former church called.  Not to ask us how we are. Not to find out why they don’t see us around anymore.  Not to ask if we would like to get together.They called to ask us for . . .  Deep breath . . .Money.And I’m thinking, “Wow.”Maybe if you cared just a little. Just enough to say, “We miss you and would like to see you sometime.”Theirs is a noble cause.  Though, I must say, I was a bit surprised that they called asking us for money since theirs is a wealthy family.  So why ask for our help?  Especially when our son has already told them that we are in the midst of helping o … [Read more...]

Quoting Quiverfull: What Happened to the IFB?

quotingquiverfull

by David Parton from What Happened To The Independent Fundamentalist Baptist Movement? - What Happened To Us?Editor's note: While parts of the IFB fall clearly in the harmful Quiverfull theology I have to give this man credit. He's asking the hard questions as someone in the IFB movement. Too bad other flavors of religion in Quiverfull are not asking and examining the same question. It can only be positive when those involved in the more cult-like versions of Christianity start critically thinking about why it doesn't work. What questions do you think Quiverfull churches should start asking? … [Read more...]

Oh Daughters of Fundamentalism, Take Upon Yourselves the Cloak of Self-Deception

NLQ original image

by Sarah Henderson cross posted from her blog Feminist in Spite of Them I recently witnessed a young girl who is struggling a bit who expressed that she was a bit unhappy with her life, being told that she just needs to take it one day at a time, and be happy with it. To me it is shameful to express to a child or a teenager that their discomfort or unhappiness with a difficult situation stems from their own inability to cope. What message is being given to girls when they are told that although they are not the creators of the bad situation, they must be the authors of the solution, but the solution must only be to swallow their feelings and smile. … [Read more...]


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