Answering “Preparing To Be A Help Meet” – Can Wanting To Please Your Husband Become Unhealthy?

Another installment of giving better answers to the questions asked at Debi Pearl’s site message board for the book ‘Preparing To Be A Help Meet’. Many young ladies ask questions on all sorts of different subjects brought up by the book. There was just one big problem, many of the answers stray into either the outright bad and emotionally unhealthy to dangerous. Yes, typical Debi Pearl borderline abusive. Here’s what we’re going to be doing here at NLQ. Every week, once or twice a week, I’ll be posting up one of the questions from the message board and ask you, our readers, to answer that poor soul’s question in a way that is logical, rational and the best possible solution, in other words 18 … [Read more...]

Not Quoting Quiverfull: Why Talking About Money Before and During Marriage Is Important

by Tim Fall from his blog Tim's Blog Just One Train Wreck After Another - Marriage, Money, and Making Decisions - how it looks in a marriage of equalsEditor's note: We've had so many weeks and months of bad Christian marriage advice from the Pearls and other ministries I felt like it was time to share better advice. I know I've found in my own life that money discussions must happen and when they don't things really get messy. This is especially important if you are struggling to leave Quiverfull theology and either transform your marriage into that of equals, or you are a former Quiverfull mother struggling to figure out how to pay your bills or deal with a spouse that doesn't believe … [Read more...]

What To Do About Toxic Power In Marriage

by Virginia Knowles cross posted from her blog Watch The ShepherdDear friends,What can a woman do if she realizes that she is in a controlling, manipulative, intimidating, verbally aggressive, and/or physically violent marriage?Two months ago I wrote a post called Recognizing Pervasive, Poisonous Power in Marriage which gave an analysis of the problem. I based it on concepts found in The Verbally Abusive Relationship by Patricia Evans. At the end, I promised a follow up post with suggestions on what she can do. … [Read more...]

Answering “Preparing To Be A Help Meet” – How Good Is Good Enough For A Potential Man?

Another installment of giving better answers to the questions asked at Debi Pearl’s site message board for the book ‘Preparing To Be A Help Meet’. Many young ladies ask questions on all sorts of different subjects brought up by the book. There was just one big problem, many of the answers stray into either the outright bad and emotionally unhealthy to dangerous. Yes, typical Debi Pearl borderline abusive. Here’s what we’re going to be doing here at NLQ. Every week, once or twice a week, I’ll be posting up one of the questions from the message board and ask you, our readers, to answer that poor soul’s question in a way that is logical, rational and the best possible solution, in other words 18 … [Read more...]

Created To Be His Help Meet – Part 2 – The Power of Stinking Thinking

by Mel cross posted from her blog When Cows and Kids CollidePart Two of the un-named epic failure - in Debi's eyes - of a woman who dared obey her husband without enough joy in her heart.Her husband is the one who lacked spiritual clarity but wanted to go to Bible College in a different country while wrecking their finances and refusing to have children for at least 5 years.  (Anyone else wonder what Vaughn Ohlman would think of this marriage?)Anyway, she continues wringing her hands... … [Read more...]

Answering “Preparing To Be A Help Meet” = Is My Grief Normal?

Another installment of giving better answers to the questions asked at Debi Pearl’s site message board for the book ‘Preparing To Be A Help Meet’. Many young ladies ask questions on all sorts of different subjects brought up by the book. There was just one big problem, many of the answers stray into either the outright bad and emotionally unhealthy to dangerous. Yes, typical Debi Pearl borderline abusive. Here’s what we’re going to be doing here at NLQ. Every week, once or twice a week, I’ll be posting up one of the questions from the message board and ask you, our readers, to answer that poor soul’s question in a way that is logical, rational and the best possible solution, in other words 18 … [Read more...]

NLQ Question of the Week: Why Do People That Say They Aren’t ‘People Pleasers’ Do The Opposite in Church?

This is a new series we have started running on Thursdays. Examining some of the questions involving long held Quiverfull theology and life.Tim Falls of Tim's Blog - Just One Train Wreck After Another had a short post on the subject of people pleasing - People Pleasing Doesn't Please Me that had me thinking about the issue of people pleasing and many fundamentalist churches. How they frequently quote this scripture: … [Read more...]

What Micah Murray and I Want You (and the Duggars) to Know About JOY (Jesus, Others, You)

by Cindy Kunsman cross posted from Under Much GraceMy blog post today was birthed by a new article written by a thoughtful young man -- a Second Generation Adult (raised in high demand religion) -- who used to be the equivalent of a Duggar, but sans TV show.  Hopefully sans abject abuse, too.(As I finish this post, The Kelly File featuring the first interview with the Duggars following the tragic news of sexual abuse in their family just beings to air. … [Read more...]

New Vyckie Garrison Interviews

Today two new interviews/articles came out about NLQ Founder Vyckie Garrison.Christian Today - 'Atheist of the year' tells of exit from Fundamentalist Quiverfull MovementA few interesting bits: … [Read more...]

Recognizing Sexual Abuse in Children

by Suzanne TitkemeyerOne thing that has happened as a result of the revelations of sexual abuse by Quiverfull super star Josh Duggar is that it has pushed the taboo subject of the sexual abuse of children into the spotlight, engendering a number of conversations on what must happen to expose it, how it should be handled and getting help for the survivors. Those are all great things to consider, that's for sure.I wish there was some way to let his victims know that many of us stand in support of them and their journeys towards healing. Many media outlets have made this about Josh, not being supportive of his victims. That much was evident from the very sloppy redacting of victim … [Read more...]


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