People Who Matter

Image from Mari's Muses

by Mari cross posted from her blog Mari's Muses “Be who you are and say what you mean. Because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” ~Dr. Seuss You find out (in a hurry!) who really matters and who really doesn’t when you decide it’s time to stop being what other people think you should be and start being you. Figuring out who matters and who doesn’t is so freeing. Yesterday, I had a conversation with a friend about realizing — just yesterday! — that I had been living for several months in a place where nobody cares. … [Read more...]

Idealism, Diplomacy and and the Pale, Blue Dot

quotingquiverfull

by Kaleesha Williams cross posted from her blog The Lost (and Found) Mind of Kaleesha WilliamsEditor's note: A fitting piece for the days following the death of Leonard Nimoy...LLAP Today at lunch I overheard my six year old directing one of the older children in the making of her PB&J sandwich. “Not like that. I want it the way it’s supposed to be.” At six years old, Little already has ideas about the way things are supposed be. Are all children like this or just mine? I don’t know. I suspect it’s more common than not. In my home, all nine of us, right down to four year old Justin, have perfectionist streaks. Natural born idealists. Though the older we are, the more set in our ways … [Read more...]

The Curse of Being Bound to an Image

Image NLQ original

by Sarah Henderson cross posted from her blog Feminist in Spite of ThemIt's been over nine years since I left my parents and over time my perception of how much progress I've made in my life has changed many times, fluctuating between sometimes thinking I am doing a terrible job at being an adult and sometimes thinking I am doing well. Through some enlightening conversations I've had recently with my friend James, who is in my cohort of ex-fundamentalists, I've come to realize that in spite of everything that I re-evaluated and realized since I left, I missed a very important thing. (I am not going to say that I missed one very important thing because I am sure that there are other t … [Read more...]

Sociopathic Leaders

Image by Ellen When Church Hurts

by Ellen cross posted from her blog When Church HurtsI read an interesting post at pimppreacher.com this weekend.  You can find the full article here: http://pimppreacher.com/post/111132531195/is-your-pastor-or-pastors-wife-a-sociopath.In it, the author lists seven “patterns of behavior” for sociopathic pastors and/or their wives.  As my husband and I read through this list together, we were astonished, once again, at the parallels to our own experience.“#1 Sociopaths Never Apologize and Are Incapable of Feeling Shame, Guilt or Remorse.”  Those of you who have read my story know that there was never an apology, and ultimately, it was my husband’s demand that they apologize to me t … [Read more...]

Excessive Modesty Makes Me Feel Objectified

Permissiontolivemelissa

by Melissa cross posted from her blog Permission To Live This last weekend we went to a large park with the kids and as we piled out of the van I noticed a Mennonite family was there. A teenage girl followed a toddler around the park, both of them wearing the long plain dresses that hid every shape of their young bodies. The mother sat on a park bench quietly watching while the husband and brother stood nearby arms folded, grimly surveying the area. I watched a young girl about age 9 climbing quietly up and down the play structures, her ankle-length dress billowing around her, her hair tucked into a small bonnet. … [Read more...]

Tangled Up In The Tower

Image from Nora Woodhouse used with permission

by Nora Woodhouse cross posted from her blog A Heart Like Mine - Part of her 'Princess' Series   Fairy tales and our current Princess Culture are often a visual representation of the struggle of women and young girls; especially those tied to fundamentalist Christian culture. They are a promise of happy ever after, and philosophy on how to get there with symbolic obstacles that must be overcome along the way. While often holding elements of the oppressive, they also holds truths about current aspects of our culture that strip away power from women and girls. At the same time it shows them a likeness of themselves working through the obstacles and waiting to get free.     Even if the inte … [Read more...]

Waking Up To Hidden Abuse In The Christian Faith

Image from Vyckie Garrison used with permission

by AJ cross posted from her blog I Am Phoenix A year and six months ago, I officially chose to no longer identify as a Christian. It was the summer of 2012. Since then, many well meaning people have goaded me, guilted me, and mistakenly told me I was confusing all of Christianity for the abusive religious cult I grew up in. They told me it was ok to reject the cult I grew up in, but that I shouldn't reject all of Christianity as well.Well, guess what. I reject it all.  I reject the teachings of the abusive, patriarchal Christian cult I grew up in. And I reject mainstream, evangelical Christianity today. In my opinion, it is imbued with toxic, demeaning beliefs. I wrote about this to … [Read more...]

Spanking Made Me Into A Mean Mommy

Permissiontolivemelissa

by Melissa cross posted from her blog Permission To Live “What’s this?” asked Ms. Action. I turned away from the pot I was stirring on the stove and answered “That’s a potato masher, to mush up the potato’s“, “Ooohhhh” she replied looking at it, then placing it aside she continued her rummaging in the utensil drawer. “What’s this Mama?” holding up the rolling pin, after I explained its function she returned to her drawer. … [Read more...]

When Minding Your Own Business Harms Others

livingliminal

by Living Liminal cross posted from her blog Living Liminal Another story of abuse, silencing and injustice is being uncovered across the blogosphere at the moment.It's a story that's been lived out, but mostly unwritten, for a number of years now. Then, a few months ago, the one who'd been silenced was given a 'voice'.And things started to hit the fan...and bloggers started blogging... … [Read more...]

Not Quoting Quiverfull: When Homeschooling Parents Are Out to Punish Adult Children – Alecia Pennington

Image NLQ original

by Suzanne TitkemeyerThis is one of those sad stories where a child of a prominent homeschooling family leaves the family suddenly with a horrifying twist. Alecia Pennington left her family of origin last year when she turned 18, escaping like many homeschooled young people with the help of her grandparents. A typical tale being repeated all over the homeschooling world, parents not realizing that there were things about their lifestyle that were harming their child, child leaving and parents expressing shock and surprise, swearing they thought everything was going all swimmingly right up until the adult child leaves. … [Read more...]


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