Part 1 – Navigating the Justice System: Alone at Nine Years Old

by Sarah Henderson cross posted from her blog Feminist in Spite of ThemTrigger Warning: For child abuse/neglect/mistreatmentWhen I was about 9, my parents were investigated by Children's Aid. Social workers came out to talk to us. They met with us and found out that my parents spanked as punishment - which made sense since my parents had posted "The 21 Rules of This House" next to the dining room table. They came back a … [Read more...]

What Lens Do The Duggar Kids See Through?

by Lana Hope cross posted from her blog Wide Open Ground Recently one of the girls I once babysat called me on phone. She wanted to talk about something that happened in the past between us. I miss her and her family, but mostly, when I look back, I feel pain. … [Read more...]

Magic Words Syndrome

by Living Liminal cross posted from her blog Living LiminalI recently re-read a couple of the emails (or nasty-grams, as I call them) I received from one of the board members of my old church. It was quite interesting to engage with them now, without the incredible pain of betrayal and judgement I felt at the time they were first sent. … [Read more...]

Revisiting Steadfast Daughters in a Quivering World: Part 6 – Soul Binding

[Note: this series is dedicated to Quivering Daughtersby the former-Quiverfull moms at No Longer Quivering.] by Daisy My name is Daisy. I am a good person…but I was a bad parent. … [Read more...]

Revisiting Steadfast Daughters in a Quivering World Part 5 – Confessions of a Quiverfull Hero

[Note: this series is dedicated to Quivering Daughters by the former-Quiverfull moms at No Longer Quivering.]by Daisy I was only 19 when I arrived at Christianity’s door, bruised and highly impressionable and, because of my family situation, determined to do a better job of sorting out my life than my parents had done. Victims of abuse in their own homes, my parents had learned very early to dissociate from their emotions. Our home was an emotionally sterile one and, although I know now that this is not true, as as child I believed my parents did not love me. I decided that when *I* had kids, if they grew up knowing nothing else, they would know for sure that I loved them more than bre … [Read more...]

Sex Ed

by Kaleesha Williams cross posted from her blog The Lost (And Found) Mind of Kaleesha WilliamsAre you going to give your children sex education and how?Okay, how about some random, rambling thoughts and interesting links? … [Read more...]

Socialization and Psychological Maltreatment: Isolating Children and Teenagers

by Sarah Henderson cross posted from her blog Feminist in Spite of Them This post deals with parents isolating and controlling their children’s social interactions; of course my parents and many other homeschooling parents have engaged in many other forms of control, but this is one that people don't seem to realize is a problem. Below, I give some examples of social isolation and control in my own life, and then reference work from Roberta Hibbard, Jane Barlow, and Harriet MacMillan to show how social isolation can be a serious problem for children who are subjected to it. … [Read more...]

When Church Hurts: Part 5

by Ellen cross posted from her blog When Church HurtsFor a few years, I had the privilege of serving in my church in several ways. I took classes, my husband and I took care of a significant portion of the landscape (which had been sorely neglected) – creating sacred spaces for people to find quiet time with the Lord, and I assisted with preparing food for Sunday morning fellowship. I also had the opportunity to teach classes over our final year there. … [Read more...]

When Church Hurts Part 4

by Ellen cross posted from her blog When Church HurtsDuring all of these years, I would come to church, sit four or five rows from the pulpit, right on the center aisle, and listen to Elliot and others preach grace, forgiveness, reconciliation, and restoration. Elliot preached and preached. I wept and wept openly. I could not sing. I could not so much as close my eyes in prayer. I could not stand for the blessing at the end of the service. I knew that no matter how much Elliot preached those words to everyone else in the congregation, they were not for me. And I would email him and tell him as much. Without response. … [Read more...]

When Church Hurts: Part 2

by Ellen cross posted from her blog When Church HurtsSpeaking out against wrongs being perpetrated in the church . . . that was my most egregious sin.  And because of it, I had lies told about me, people eavesdropped on my conversations, and I received hate mail from a group of people telling me that I was a terrible person.My only response was to continue talking occasionally to the lay leader of the church, Denise, and to send Elliot  my questions and thoughts in emails – often asking if we could meet to talk, but never getting a response. At one point (perhaps more than one but only one I know about), Elliot shared my emails with the consistory and they wrote a letter telling me th … [Read more...]