News Links September 5, 2012

Sometimes churches need to be reminded that if they campaign for a certain party or candidate they put their tax exempt status at risk - ChicoER - Editorial: Church runs afoul of rulesThere's an interesting article by Jenny Rae Armstrong over at Red Letter Christians about Patriarchy, Pop Culture, and PornograpyThoughts on handling a large family after leaving Quiverfull Patriarch world far behind. Recovering from Religion - When the Grass Looks Greener Elsewhere- Be Sure the Fertilizer Works in Your Yard!And for anyone that needs a reminder of poisonous and destructive Patriarchy and Quiverfull beliefs can be just one quick read through the Duggar-approved 7 Basic Needs of a … [Read more...]

Millipede: Part 25

by MillipedeThings settled down. My ex took the breakup in stride. We both talked about remaining friends. Now that I didn't have to be his caretaker/servant/mom (what a strange combo) I felt better. No longer was dread a daily companion, I was free from all of that.We both did the "let's stay friends" bit. It seemed like that it might work. My ex seemed to have adapted wonderfully to the fact that we were splitting up. He even looked at options whereby he would move out so as to save me the trouble of moving. Things didn't work out, but at least he was being considerate. We got along better, now that the tension was down. I was ready to take my time, save my money for the … [Read more...]

“Biblical” Parenting: Introduction

by LatebloomerEvery once in a while, I realize something shockingly obvious, something that confronts yet another false assumption that has managed to cling to my mind even as I've moved further and further away from my fundamentalist Christian roots.In the whole Bible, there is not a single verse that credits parents for having raised a good child.  Nothing from God, nothing from any adult sons or daughters in the Bible.  Not one word of thanks, not one word of credit.It would be easy to insert a few parental credit verses into the Bible.  Maybe we could add a little phrase here or there in the Old Testament, such as "King David, because of his godly parents," or "Moses, thanks t … [Read more...]

In The Spotlights Glare – Are The Duggar Family & The Bates Family Media Whores?

by CaluluAnother television season is upon us again and that means one thing. More of the Duggars "19 Kids and Counting". The show starts anew on Tuesday, August 28th on TLC Channel at 9 pm est. This year their friends theBates have a show too - "The United Bates of America" There are preview videos for both series up now on the TLC website.Looking through both videos I have noticed one thing, both families have changed a great deal in the short time they've been in the spot light. Which is ironic considering how Michelle and Jim Bob Duggar have stated from the beginning that they are to be a light shining out to the world, a shining city on the hill. That's not quite what I'm … [Read more...]

NLQ FAQ Revisited: Does Patriarchy Glorify God?

by Kristen Rosser ~ aka: KR Wordgazer  Q: As a Quiverfull couple, we practice headship and submission to strengthen our marriage and bring glory to God.  But you are saying that Patriarchy hurts the husband and belittles God.  Please explain.What does “glorify” mean when we’re talking about God?  A simple definition can be found in what we commonly mean when we say a person is “seeking glory.”  It means that person wants the credit for good things that have happened, and to be honored for those things.  To glorify God is to seek glory not for ourselves, but for God– to act in ways that point to God, that give God the credit for good things in our lives and the honor that comes from t … [Read more...]

NLQ FAQ Revisited: How can I help my “Quiverfull” friend?

by Vyckie  Q: How can I help my “Quiverfull” friend?I have a good friend who is really into the quiverfull/patriarchy lifestyle. She is always careful to appear cheerful and happy with her family life, but I have often suspected that things are not quite as rosy as she wants everyone to believe. After reading the stories here on NLQ, I am more concerned than ever, especially for her children who are very well-behaved and respectful but who seem to be sending out “distress signals” like Angel did in Vyckie’s story. My friend is slowly cutting out everyone who loves her and has offered to help. What can I do?There are two important factors to consider in this situation:1) H … [Read more...]

Millipede Part 22

by MillipedeAmidst all the craziness with the alcohol, there was yet another worrying development which had crept up.As I mentioned before, my marriage had developed two fronts;one being my husband's self destructive propensities and the second which came later, that being his embrace of religious Patriarchy. The booze crisis came in with a flash, but that didn't mean that trouble wasn't brewing on the ol' Patriarchy front.Despite his new alcohol problem, my husband remained devoutly involved with the church. It was bitterly ironic and a testament to his hypocrisy, but it didn't stop my husband. In fact, I noticed the return of an old attitude, the one where he was lord over the … [Read more...]

Millipede Part 17

by MillipedeThis time around it was different on the surface at least. My husband was trying a kinder and gentler approach to his faith. Rather than trying to make his wife follow behind him in the old Patriarchy Parade, my husband was content to go to church by himself. He did encourage me to go and on the infrequent occasions that I did, he would make a point of being considerate of me.Even so, I did not make plans to attend on a regular basis, even with my husband willing to leave when I was ready, it was usually about three in the afternoon when we left church. Given that it took over an hour to get there, the day was mostly over when we got home. Also, this pastor believed that … [Read more...]

Bad, Evil Psychology Helped Me

by LatebloomerGrowing up, I heard a lot of scoffing at psychology in my family, homeschooling community, and fundamentalist church.  In those circles, the study and application of psychology represented a worthless human attempt to feel happier apart from God and become better without the guidance of the Bible.   The anti-psychology sentiment was so strong that even building kids' self-confidence and self-esteem was derided as a "worldly" goal.  There was too much "self" in the name.  Real True Christian children were to be obedient and humble instead.Looking back, I definitely had the obedience thing handled; in fact, I cannot remember ever purposefully disobeying my parents, even in … [Read more...]

Revisiting NLQ FAQ: Should There Be a “You” in Quivering?

What “Deny Yourself” Means – and Doesn’t Mean by Kristen Rosser ~ aka: KR Wordgazer The founders of No Longer Qivering spelled “Quivering” without a “u“ because, as they say, “There is no ‘you’ in Quivering” – there’s no place for self - and they claim this is a bad thing. But Jesus said that a true believer must deny himself, take up his cross and follow after Him. Quiverfull women take the Bible’s admonition to die to self very seriously. We use the acronym J.O.Y., for true JOY comes from putting “Jesus first, Others second and Yourself last.” How can you encourage Christian wives and mothers to turn from Christ’s teachings by making “You” a priority?The problem with the way Quiverf … [Read more...]


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