The Parenting Project – Introduction

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by CaluluA while back Libby Anne from Love, Joy Feminism had a inspired idea to run a series on her blog called Raised Quiverfull. The way it worked if you're not familiar with it was that she posted a list of questions asking readers to write in and share what life was like being raised in a Quiverfull Patriarchy Fundamentalist home. An impressive array of folks responded to her multi part questionnaire and it made for some of the most revealing and interesting reading on the subject of Quiverfull.Then Sierra came up with the theme of The Sexuality Project on her blog the phoenix and olive branch. Open to anyone that wished to participate that had been involved with the world of … [Read more...]

Fear-Based Parenting

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by Kristen Rosser aka KRWordgazerLatebloomer at Past Tense Present Progressive is blogging about Reb Bradley's book Child Training Tips.  Calulu at Roadkill on the Information Superhighway is blogging about Michael and Debbi Pearl's To Train Up a Child.  I'd like to chime in today with some thoughts about the method of child rearing which the two books share: they call it "Biblical parenting" or "Bible-based child training," but it bears no resemblance to the way Jesus spoke of or treated children.  Instead, it takes a few proof texts (mostly from Proverbs) and builds an entire harsh, repressive and unjust regime out of them.This is not something I can remain silent about. It goes … [Read more...]

Crime and Punishment

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by MariI've been procrastinating about telling this part of the story.In the previous chapter of the story, I talked about having nightmares about death. That story was the whitewashed version. I’m not saying that what was written isn’t true. It is. But for me, the experience was a lot worse than it probably sounded in the previous chapter. When I was in college several years ago, I wrote several autobiographical stories, and most of what I posted in the previous chapter was one of the stories I wrote. At that time, I wasn’t in a place where I could expose what really happened.I’m not sure if I’m currently in a place to talk about it either.But I’m going to try.Those years … [Read more...]

Holy Terror

by MariI like to tell people that I’m a quarter Lutheran.But I’m really not.I tell people that because it helps them to stay focused on the story — because when someone makes a statement that ridiculous and silly, naturally, everybody’s going to start asking questions.When I was a little kid, we spent a lot of time with my grandparents in South Dakota. I think we visited about one weekend per month (roughly), and we always went to church with them. Hence, my being a quarter Lutheran.Between all the Chapel services, Sunday School and roughly one Lutheran church service per month, by the time I was about 5 I knew just about everything there was to know (from an intelle … [Read more...]

Charlie Fuqua says Death Penalty an Option for Rebellious Children

by Bruce GerencserCharlie Fuqua, Republican candidate for the Arkansas House of Representatives, supports the death penalty for rebellious children.Fuqua wrote: The maintenance of civil order in society rests on the foundation of family discipline. Therefore, a child who disrespects his parents must be permanently removed from society in a way that gives an example to all other children of the importance of respect for parents. The death penalty for rebellious children is not something to be taken lightly. The guidelines for administering the death penalty to rebellious children are given in Deut 21:18-21:If a man have a stubborn and rebellious son, which will not obey the voice … [Read more...]

The Myth of Teenage Rebellion

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by LatebloomerSometimes, as my toddler and I cuddle together to read books on the couch, I can't help but imagine what our relationship might be like when he becomes a teenager.  On some days, I dread it like a slowly-approaching disaster.  On other days, I feel a sense of hope that, as I deal with my own issues, I'll be able to give him something better than I experienced.   I'm confronting my old ideas about teenagers head on, and replacing them with healthier and more accurate ideas.Growing up in fundamentalist homeschooling circles, I heard a lot about "Biblical" parenting--extreme parental authority enforced through potentially abusive levels of spanking.  Because it was "Bi … [Read more...]

Parenting & the Super Religious

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by CaluluLatebloomer from the NLQ Spiritual Abuse Survivor Blogs Network has written an excellent series right now based upon reviewing the parenting advice in Reb Bradley's book 'Child Training Tips'  She's done an outstanding job on this topic and I have to admit it triggers me just a bit. Triggers some of my experiences back in the old church.During my years in Fundamentalism Evangelicalism I never encountered Reb Bradley's book. The one that was pushed upon me constantly was Michael and Debi Pearl's "To Train Up A Child". I read through it once, horror-struck by the suggestions in the book, finding it ridiculously harsh and thinking that raising your children like little obeying … [Read more...]

Toddlerhood: Part 2

by Mari ChristmasMom’s family had a big ol’ family reunion at Christmas that year. My great-grandma turned 80 two days before Christmas and my family threw a big party. Everybody showed up.I don’t know a lot about this party, but from memories I’ve pieced together, I get the impression that we had a little variety show in honor of Grandma’s birthday. I remember my mom’s cousin doing a little ventriloquism act, and the whole family stood up front and sang “How Great Thou Art.” (I found both creepy. I don’t remember a lot from my very young years that wasn’t scary.)We tried to get pictures of each family posing with Great-grandma that year.The picture my mom gave me from this end … [Read more...]

The (Polished) Lives of Others

by Broken DaughtersI remember dreaming about life the way I had seen it in those P/QF books and magazines and occasional home making blogs. It’s funny because it was never that way at our house. But I always thought that one day, I would live one of those beautiful lives.I’d have a pantry filled with homemade juices and marmalade and sauces and relishes. I’d have a beautiful, antique and yet modern kitchen. I’d have a great view from my kitchen windows, and I’d wear a beautiful apron. I’d be… hm. One of those fairytale housewives, I guess.My life would be quiet, relaxed. I’d be busy decorating a beautiful home, not really worrying about money and how to get by. My husband would be … [Read more...]

“Biblical” Parenting, Criticism #4: A Parent Who Isolates in Order to Control

by LatebloomerThis is part of a series of posts reviewing Reb Bradley's book "Child Training Tips". Read the introduction here. Read criticism #1 here. Read criticism #2 here. Read criticism #3 here.To briefly review, my first criticism of Reb Bradley's book "Child Training Tips" discussed the way his advice pushed parents toward the worst possible interpretation of their child's behavior at the expense of mercy and understanding.  My second criticism looked at the extreme level of control that parents are urged to have over their child's mind and body, which can prevent the child from maturing and can put the parent at risk of developing abusive habits.  My third criticism look … [Read more...]


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