The Parenting Project: School & Parenting

school-discipline

If you'd like to participate in the Parenting Project please take a look at the Introduction and Childhood Questions.Today's questions deal with the way you were parented or disciplined during your school years and your parents interaction with the school rules. Were they on board with the ways in which your teachers tried to make you behave and educate you? … [Read more...]

The Parenting Project: Childhood Part 1

parenting

Here's the next set of questions for the Parenting Project. They deal with the type of parenting you received from your own parents and while you were at school. I hope you're consider joining this project and sharing what you know about parenting. Again, only answer as much as you feel comfortable doing. I know some will have had childhood experiences of the type that might trigger just by thinking back to your childhood.To everyone participating thank you!Introduction Questions ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 1. What type of parenting style and/or discipline did your parents follow? 2. Was their parenting/discipline style something that their church taught or … [Read more...]

The Parenting Project – Introduction

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by CaluluA while back Libby Anne from Love, Joy Feminism had a inspired idea to run a series on her blog called Raised Quiverfull. The way it worked if you're not familiar with it was that she posted a list of questions asking readers to write in and share what life was like being raised in a Quiverfull Patriarchy Fundamentalist home. An impressive array of folks responded to her multi part questionnaire and it made for some of the most revealing and interesting reading on the subject of Quiverfull.Then Sierra came up with the theme of The Sexuality Project on her blog the phoenix and olive branch. Open to anyone that wished to participate that had been involved with the world of … [Read more...]

Fear-Based Parenting

sparetherod

by Kristen Rosser aka KRWordgazerLatebloomer at Past Tense Present Progressive is blogging about Reb Bradley's book Child Training Tips.  Calulu at Roadkill on the Information Superhighway is blogging about Michael and Debbi Pearl's To Train Up a Child.  I'd like to chime in today with some thoughts about the method of child rearing which the two books share: they call it "Biblical parenting" or "Bible-based child training," but it bears no resemblance to the way Jesus spoke of or treated children.  Instead, it takes a few proof texts (mostly from Proverbs) and builds an entire harsh, repressive and unjust regime out of them.This is not something I can remain silent about. It goes … [Read more...]

Crime and Punishment

spare_the_rod4

by MariI've been procrastinating about telling this part of the story.In the previous chapter of the story, I talked about having nightmares about death. That story was the whitewashed version. I’m not saying that what was written isn’t true. It is. But for me, the experience was a lot worse than it probably sounded in the previous chapter. When I was in college several years ago, I wrote several autobiographical stories, and most of what I posted in the previous chapter was one of the stories I wrote. At that time, I wasn’t in a place where I could expose what really happened.I’m not sure if I’m currently in a place to talk about it either.But I’m going to try.Those years … [Read more...]

The Myth of Teenage Rebellion

teenager

by LatebloomerSometimes, as my toddler and I cuddle together to read books on the couch, I can't help but imagine what our relationship might be like when he becomes a teenager.  On some days, I dread it like a slowly-approaching disaster.  On other days, I feel a sense of hope that, as I deal with my own issues, I'll be able to give him something better than I experienced.   I'm confronting my old ideas about teenagers head on, and replacing them with healthier and more accurate ideas.Growing up in fundamentalist homeschooling circles, I heard a lot about "Biblical" parenting--extreme parental authority enforced through potentially abusive levels of spanking.  Because it was "Bi … [Read more...]

Parenting & the Super Religious

sickchild

by CaluluLatebloomer from the NLQ Spiritual Abuse Survivor Blogs Network has written an excellent series right now based upon reviewing the parenting advice in Reb Bradley's book 'Child Training Tips'  She's done an outstanding job on this topic and I have to admit it triggers me just a bit. Triggers some of my experiences back in the old church.During my years in Fundamentalism Evangelicalism I never encountered Reb Bradley's book. The one that was pushed upon me constantly was Michael and Debi Pearl's "To Train Up A Child". I read through it once, horror-struck by the suggestions in the book, finding it ridiculously harsh and thinking that raising your children like little obeying … [Read more...]

“Biblical” Parenting, Criticism #4: A Parent Who Isolates in Order to Control

by LatebloomerThis is part of a series of posts reviewing Reb Bradley's book "Child Training Tips". Read the introduction here. Read criticism #1 here. Read criticism #2 here. Read criticism #3 here.To briefly review, my first criticism of Reb Bradley's book "Child Training Tips" discussed the way his advice pushed parents toward the worst possible interpretation of their child's behavior at the expense of mercy and understanding.  My second criticism looked at the extreme level of control that parents are urged to have over their child's mind and body, which can prevent the child from maturing and can put the parent at risk of developing abusive habits.  My third criticism look … [Read more...]

“Biblical” Parenting, Criticism #3: A Parent Who Tries to Change Minds and Hearts Through Spanking

by LatebloomerThis is part of a series of posts reviewing Reb Bradley's book "Child Training Tips". Read the introduction here. Read criticism #1 here. Read criticism #2 here.To briefly review, my first criticism of Reb Bradley's book "Child Training Tips" discussed the way his advice pushed parents toward the worst possible interpretation of their child's behavior at the expense of mercy and understanding.  My second criticism looked at the extreme level of control that parents are urged to have over their child's mind and body, which can prevent the child from maturing and can put the parent at risk of developing abusive habits.  Now here is my third criticism.Criticism #3: … [Read more...]

“Biblical” Parenting, Criticism #1: A Parent Who Assumes The Worst

by LatebloomerThe task of reviewing Reb Bradley's book "Child Training Tips" has been a lot more challenging than I expected.  First of all, where do I start when I disagree with almost every sentence that this book contains?  I can find almost no common ground on which to begin.  And how can I explain my reasons for disagreement when the very things that I see as horrifying are held up as admirable goals by the author?Because of these difficulties, I have decided that these posts will simply be a way for Present Me to explain to Past Me that this so-called "Biblical" parenting is damaging to individuals and relationships because it sacrifices all other virtues for the sake of au … [Read more...]


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