Justice is No Lady: Chapter 3 ~ Company of the Faithful

Warning: This story series contains descriptions of physical abuse. by Tess Willoughby At Regent University, I had lots of role models. Sweet-tempered women were submitting to their husbands, keeping their student apartments immaculate, and having babies right and left. I learned to buy wheat berries from the local co-op and grind them to bake bread. We were Stepford Wives, only hugely, proudly fertile. We grew herbs. We read books on natural childbirth. We prayed for God to make us more meek and submissive. And we prayed for our dear darling hubbies over at the Christian law school who were going to usher in a new American Revolution and turn this country around. “Shh! Quiet! … [Read more...]

NLQ FAQ: The Bible and Male Headship – Part 3

by Kristen Rosser ~ aka: KR Wordgazer The question we began with was: Doesn't the Bible say the man is the head of the woman and that the husband is the head of the house, the instrument of God for directing the family? Isn't he God's designated authority, the one God holds responsible for all decision-making on behalf of the couple and their children?   We have looked at the question of male “headship” in light of the Bible’s overarching “Great Story,” and we have examined Ephesians Chapter 5 in light of ancient cultural understandings and original word meanings. Now we turn to some of the other passages and the questions they raise. But doesn’t 1 Peter 3 say Sarah obeyed … [Read more...]

NLQ FAQ: The Bible and Male Headship – Part 2

by Kristen Rosser ~ aka: KR Wordgazer The question being asked in Part 1 was: Doesn't the Bible say the man is the head of the woman and that the husband is the head of the house, the instrument of God for directing the family? Isn't he God's designated authority, the one God holds responsible for all decision-making on behalf of the couple and their children?   With the understanding from Part 1, of how the covenant community of the church fits into the Bible’s Great Story as a redeemed spiritual family-- a family in which all Christians are brothers and sisters and God is our Father-- let’s begin now to examine some of the passages that refer to men as “head.” As discussed in … [Read more...]

Family Man, Family Leader: To Train a Child – What a Train Wreck

by LivingForEternity It is of the Lord’s mercies that we are not consumed, because His compassions fail not. They are new every morning; great is Thy faithfulness. Lamentations 3:22-23 These are the words that my oldest daughter had printed on her graduations invitation. I am amazed at this, considering how she was raised for several years. It all started about two years after I had begun to home school my kids. A fellow mom gave me a copy of To Train a Child. She insisted it was the best help she ever had with raising her children. Since she had about eight at the time, I figured she must have known what she was talking about. Took the poison home and swallowed it. The whole premise of … [Read more...]

NLQ FAQ: The Bible and Male Headship – Part 1

by Kristen Rosser ~ aka: KR Wordgazer Doesn't the Bible say the man is the head of the woman and that the husband is the head of the house, the instrument of God for directing the family? Isn't he God's designated authority, the one God holds responsible for all decision-making on behalf of the couple and their children? In "The Bible and the Nature of Women," the first two chapters of Genesis were explored, making the point that God's initial plan was not that the man should have "headship" over the woman, but that the man and woman together would have dominion over the Creation. That unity and mutuality was shattered by the Fall. Part of the curse of the Fall, as God told the woman, was … [Read more...]

Reflections on what went wrong

by Jo @ Woman Reclaimed We're rapidly approaching the anniversary of when I lost my life as I knew it. I'm finally to a point where I feel strong enough to boldly face where we went, what went wrong and what we messed up so very badly. We fell down the rabbit hole of Patriarchal matrimony. We didn't necessarily mean to do so. Certainly, we never thought we were down so far as we truly were. We thought we didn't fully believe in wife-only submission. We thought we never believed that the wife's salvation is based upon the Husband's favor. In more ways than I ever understood until the journey of this last year, we did fall into the trap. Just in case anyone is wondering what my opinion on … [Read more...]

Dan Webster's Religious “Family Values” – Disguised Misogyny: Former devotee speaks out

For Immediate Release: October 5, 2010.  For more information, contact Vyckie Garrison. Women are conditioned to be submissive to their husbands, discouraged from using birth control, and prohibited from working outside the home. Gothard-style worldview and lifestyle overburdens women, enslaves the daughters and destroys families. Vyckie Garrison was involved with Webster ally, Bill Gothard's teachings for 14 years; after following the fundamentalist teachings of the 'Quiverfull' movement, Garrison was subjected to mental abuse and told to ignore medical advice not to have more children because her job as a woman was to obey God by submitting to her husband - an act that allegedly … [Read more...]

10 things that happen when you leave the Quiverful/Patriarchal movement

by Ima Wakenow The following is a list of things that come to your awareness about the QF/P life once you are out of it for quite sometime.  This is just a partial list of realizations that most of the women who escaped have had in the years following their liberation. 1. You realize you weren’t the only one. This one is huge and that is why I list it first.  Inside the QF/P movement you are told you are wrong for having doubts.  Wrong for being disgruntled.  Wrong for having desires.  Eventually you find that you can not sustain a life of self sacrifice never attending to your own essential needs.  You may question everything you feel since you were told you can not trust your … [Read more...]

Time Heals All Wounds ~ Part 10: It's in the Lord's Hands

All beautiful the march of days, as seasons come and go; The Hand that shaped the rose hath wrought the crystal of the snow by Shelly Cruz I walked over to the phone, and dialed Cecilia’s number. My first thought was that it would possibly be disconnected, but who knows, maybe they finally moved. Cecilia always talked about how the time would come, and their house would be demolished, and then they would have to move. They were living rent-free in an old farmhouse. Someone had blessed them years ago with a property. They had to care for it, and in return they could live there for free, but once the owner passed away, they'd have to move. They were even given a 15-passenger van as a … [Read more...]

Justice is No Lady: Chapter 2 ~ First Prison Break

Warning: This story series contains descriptions of physical abuse. by Tess Willoughby 1993 was a rough year. It was the year that Nate was fired from his engineering job in Tazewell, Virginia, and first started thinking about studying the law. It was the year when we went to a conference and met a pastor who advocated corporal punishment for wives, and Nate took to his teachings like a duck to water. It was the year I had Jack, who was conceived a few months after Daniel’s birth. Most notably, 1993 marked my first attempt at a separation from Nate. Daniel had been born at home. Nate and I were part of the Christian separatist movement of the late ’80s and early ’90s, rooted in … [Read more...]