Answering “Preparing To Be A Help Meet” – Does An Immodest Culture Allow For Less Modesty?

Another installment of giving better answers to the questions asked at Debi Pearl’s site message board for the book ‘Preparing To Be A Help Meet’. Many young ladies ask questions on all sorts of different subjects brought up by the book. There was just one big problem, many of the answers stray into either the outright bad and emotionally unhealthy to dangerous. Yes, typical Debi Pearl borderline abusive. Here’s what we’re going to be doing here at NLQ. Every week, once or twice a week, I’ll be posting up one of the questions from the message board and ask you, our readers, to answer that poor soul’s question in a way that is logical, rational and the best possible solution, in other words 18 … [Read more...]

Ex-Homeschooler Fashion

by Latebloomer cross posted from her blog Past Tense, Present ProgressiveAs a former fundamentalist homeschooled kid, one of many aspects of life that I've had to do a lot of catch up in is fashion.  I grew up choosing clothing based solely on modesty, which in my circles meant that I was shopping in clothing sections meant for the elderly and basically wearing fabric sacks.  Often, I had to make things for myself when even the grandmotherly clothing options failed me.  Everything I wore was at least 4 sizes too big and several inches too short, and I had no idea about choosing colors that complemented my skin tone, no idea about hair, no idea about makeup, no idea about skin and nail ca … [Read more...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Girls Wearing What They Want Are Sinning Against Jesus?

by Reagan Ramm from his site Reagan Ramm.com - Modesty: A Guy's Opinion Part 2Editor's note: Several of the blogs we quote here for the Quoting Quiverfull feature have used Reagan Ramm's Part 1 on Modesty to justify all sorts of shaming. Here's the second part and it gets no better. Now he's claiming that if you wear something you want to wear and it causes someone to stumble you've lost the freedom to make clothing choices plus sinned against Jesus. Then he goes on in his blog to list what is and isn't modest. What gives him this right? … [Read more...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Telling Someone Else To Cover Up?

by Trish Ramos from Fish With Trish - "Uh Oh!"Editor's note: Several stories at Ramos site that explain how she and one of her readers confronted and shamed women dressed in what they considered an 'immodest' manner. I can't even... just horrified thinking of how badly the recipient of their tracts and unsolicited advice must have felt, ashamed, blamed and all sorts of negative things. Intolerance, hate disguised as love and a number of other things Jesus never said to inflict upon others. … [Read more...]

Dear Christian Woman: Is Your Facebook Profile Photo Causing Men to Lust?

by Bruce Gerencser cross posted from his blog The Life and Times of Bruce GerencserFundamentalist Christians rarely miss an opportunity to point out ANOTHER behavior that is a sin or causes others to sin.Several years ago, Trisha Ramos  wrote: … [Read more...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Only Make Yourself Attractive While Husband-Hunting?

by Laurel  J. Davis from Whole Magazine - What a God-Fearing Man Really Wants From a WomanEditor's note: This starts off sort of okay with a church survey asking the men what they want in a wife but then takes a severe right-hand turn right into a word salad pile of modesty shaming/blaming liberally dressed in cognitive dissonance. Don't dress in anyway that calls attention to yourself but dress to catch the eye when you are husband hunting seems to be one of the major themes. Funny, the article does not say one thing about the men who were polled requesting that their women dress to these false modesty standards of the author. … [Read more...]

How Abstinence Only Sex Education Led Me Down An Unexpected Path

by Amber Barnhill cross posted with permission from her blog Atheist By Accident.This was posted earlier in the week at Hemant Mehta's Patheos blog The Friendly AtheistWhen talking about my religious past, I often find myself referencing movies. How else are mainstream humans going to relate? Neo waking up in The Matrix. The barely-audible Asian chick in Pitch Perfect. And, in this case, Drew Barrymore‘s role in Never Been Kissed. If you’ve never seen the movie, the title really says it all.Imagine being an almost-24-year-old, intelligent, moderately-attractive-yet-socially-awkward female venturing into the real world for the first time, having never even held hands with a guy an … [Read more...]

NLQ Question of the Week: Why Do Fundamentalists Obsess About Modesty?

This is a new series we have started running on Thursdays. Examining some of the questions involving long held Quiverfull theology and life.First we have many different ladies and ministries calling modesty anything from floor length skirts to blending with the crowd in such a way that doesn't draw attention to yourself. Of course, in some Muslim countries modesty is defined by the burqa, but in fundamentalist Christianity modesty is a sliding scale, whatever your pastor decrees. Knee to collar bone covered with no short sleeves? Mennonite caped dresses disguising the shape of the breasts and bottom? Denim skirts and loose tees? … [Read more...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Even Completely Covering Up Can Be Immodest?

by Christy Peterson from A Lovely Calling - ModestyEditor's note: So now extremist Christianity and Quiverfull are seeking to move the goalposts yet again on modesty? It's not enough to cover up almost completely, you now cannot wear anything that makes you stand out or draws attention to you. But isn't that what many of the adherents to the Christian modesty people do, stand out from the crowd as oddly dressed? So confusing. … [Read more...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Your Body Is Only For Your Future Husband’s Eyes?

by Beecher Proch from Girl Defined - Guy Thoughts: Come on Girl, Keep it Modest (thanks to Bruce Gerencser for posting about Beecher Good catch!)Editor's note: Lots and lots of slut-shaming/women-blaming at the original link even if the author admits that men at 100% responsible for where they put their gaze. Guessing he has no one around to yell 'Nike' for him to look at his shoes when some half-dressed temptress crosses his path. He fails to realize that no matter how much a pretty girl, or any girl, covers up there's always going to be a squad of guys sitting in the pews popping pocket rockets when they go by. It's NORMAL!!! … [Read more...]


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