Preparing To Be A Help Meet: Creative Interpretation of the Book of Esther – Part 1

preparing

by Mel cross posted from her blog When Cows and Kids CollideThe end of chapter 2 of  "Preparing to Be a Help Meet" disturbed me the first time I read it, but I couldn't exactly figure out why.  I mean, yeah, Debi twists the stories of Esther and Ruth, but she does that all the time.  I realized that I resented that Debi messed around with the stories to make both Esther and Ruth seem like passive women who did what men told them rather than active participants in their own lives. … [Read more...]

Christian Reconstruction, ATI, Abuse, & Submission: Modesty and Lust Part 5

gardenofeden

by SJ Reidhead cross posted from her blog The Pink FlamingoI’m not a strong advocate for sex outside of marriage.  I am certainly no advocate for adultery, which I think is wrong.  It’s one of the Ten Big Ones, as in Thou Shalt Not.  But, fornication, which is sex between individuals who are not married either to one another, or anyone else, is not considered a major sin.  I do think, though, it is an invitation to complicate one’s life.  That’s why I avoid the subject, and the process.  It’s complicated, complicating, and just tends to get in the way of life.  Maybe that’s a cop-out, but I have enough problems right now.  I don’t need to deal with the emotional ups and downs of an involv … [Read more...]

Christian Reconstruction, ATI, Abuse and Submission: Modesty and Lust Part 4

stripeddresses

by SJ Reidhead cross posted from her blog The Pink Flamingo “…When I think about my clothing choices in college it simultaneously convicts me of immodesty and helps me understand the struggle girls face trying to be modest. I wasn’t trying to be inappropriate. I just wanted to look good. I was single. I wanted to be attractive to girls and I wanted to be affirmed by other guys. For me to be modest I would have needed to wear looser shirts that I didn’t think looked as good on me. That would have been tough. And making that tough decision would have made me much more appreciative and considerate of my sisters in Christ….” … [Read more...]

Preparing To Be A Help Meet: Michael and Debi’s Love Story – Part Three

preparing

by Mel cross posted from her blog When Cows and Kids CollideIn the two previous posts on Debi and Michael Pearl's 'love' story, Debi discusses how God told her she was going to marry Michael when she was 13 and he was 21.  She spends from when she was about 16 to 20 being Michael's ministry flunky and finally gets his attention by showing up with a pretend fiance.  He's pissed because he doesn't want to lose his flunky to another man.Sounds like a match made in heaven, alright.  Let's dive into the last bit. … [Read more...]

“Modesty is Hottest” and Girls’ Self Confidence

modestIsHottest

by Libby Anne cross posted from her blog Love, Joy, FeminismBy now, you’ve probably heard “modest is hottest” thrown around like a mantra. There are “modest is hottest” fashion shows and “modest is hottest”conferences for girls. It’s about time I weighed in.Frankly, I’m conflicted. When I was a teen striving to dress modestly, I struggled with body image. I covered my body in baggy clothing. I felt unattractive, and that affected how I carried and viewed myself. So I like the idea that in many churches girls like I was are now being encouraged to think about fashion and dress in a way that makes them feel confident and good about themselves. That’s a good thing! … [Read more...]

Not Quoting Quiverfull: Protecting Sons?

Boy in Front of Girl

Blogger Bunker Down has written an excellent rant about modesty - How the modesty police are hurting my son If you want your daughter (and hopefully son) to dress modestly because you want them to value their intrinsic self over their outer self?  Fabulous.  If you want your daughter (and hopefully son) to dress modestly to create healthy attitudes toward sexuality?  Great.  If you want your daughter (and hopefully son) to dress modestly to glorify the Creator of all things?  Boo-ya.  If you want your daughter (and hopefully son) to dress modestly because it is a long standing tradition of your church/synagogue/people/culture/or group?  Awesome possum. … [Read more...]

The Female Body, a Source of Contamination

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by Libby Anne cross posted from her blog Love, Joy, FeminismI recently came upon a blog post titled “How the Modesty Police Are Hurting My Son,” in which blogger Ami writes about trying to teach her son that he is responsible for his own actions even as those around her tell him that girls are responsible for covering up so as to “protect” him. As I looked through the mostly positive comments on her post, I was struck by this one: I think it’s great that you teach your child all these things—and I think it’s great that parents teach their children modesty. And sometimes it is to protect boys—they can’t un-see a girl’s body once it’s been seen barely clad. Many parents teach their childre … [Read more...]

Preparing to be a Help Meet: Billy’s Courtship

preparing

by Mel cross posted from her blog When Cows and Kids CollideYou may wonder why I didn't title the previous post and this one "Lydia and Billy's Courtship: Part # "  I didn't because the two narratives feel like they were written about two different courtships rather than one event involving two people.Billy's description of courting Lydia is harder to read; not because of Billy or any of his actions, but because his interview is interrupted by comments from the editors - All. The. Time.All emphasis is from the original."Q: What attracted you to Lydia? A: When I first met Lydia I wasn't what you would call really attracted, nor was I ready for marriage. (...) Our initial … [Read more...]

Christian Reconstruction, ATI, Abuse and Submission: Modesty and Lust Part 3

parisianladies

by SJ Reidhead cross posted from her blog The Pink FlamingoSo-called ‘Christian’ Modesty is a strange critter, at best.  There is absolutely nothing wrong with any group implementing a dress code. Feeling like a rank hypocrite and jerk, where I was once dead set against school uniforms (when I was in school) I now think they are the only answer to any number of problems schools and students face.  If a church or sect, or cult wants to have their plain dress, head pieces, or sailor suits of a Hubbard rear admiral or something, that’s fine.  It is still a somewhat free country where we should be somewhat free to practice what ever form or religion, or no religion, as long as we don’t harm o … [Read more...]

Preparing To Be A Help Meet: Lydia’s Courtship

preparing

by Mel cross posted from her blog When Cows and Kids CollideChapter Two begins with this title page: Discovering God's Will Moral to the Story: God often leads us down his path through the counsel of those who are wiser.I agree with wholeheartedly with the moral.  I have been so grateful for excellent advice given lovingly by my parents, siblings, my in-laws, my teachers, professors, people I've worked with and random strangers to name a few. … [Read more...]


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