Who Was That Masked Man? Part 5

by Calulu So when we left off Tina was still believing that Tom was coming home. We were having nothing to do with the Smiths and Tom doesn't come home. What he does do is go to my husband and ask him to talk to me about working a few mornings a week at his office to transfer all his paper documents into digital on his new computer system. I don't want to do it but it's a little slow that spring in my job so I grit my teeth, bite my tongue and start going into his office for four hours every morning. I know this is a mistake but hey, there's not much going on to prevent me and Tom isn't going to be there at the same time as me, win-win. I'm such a sap. Plus I'd quit working at the … [Read more...]

Introducing, Raised Quiverfull!

raised

by Libby Anne Nine young adults who were raised in families involved in the Christian Patriarchy and Quiverfull movements have come together here to answer questions about their upbringing, their questioning, and their transition to lives in the normal world. Ranging in age from their early twenties to their early thirties, all have questioned and left the Christian Patriarchy and Quiverfull movements and all but one blog against what they see as the destructive results of those movements. These nine young adults come from an array of backgrounds (no two families in the Christian Patriarchy and Quiverfull movements are identical) and have today arrived at a variety of perspectives … [Read more...]

Millipede: Part 5

headless

by Millipede   Peevish men, wives who watched every word and worse they really embraced the submission beliefs. The wives would gripe very rarely about their husbands and the work and if they did they were sure to say that they weren't in disagreement with the system, ,merely letting off a little steam. The women were just as much true believers. This isn't as I first thought/hoped in that Patriarchy can be a humane system for women. Instead I realized that there will always be those who for varying reasons, become ardent followers of movements which harm them. There are women who will accept or even come to love degradation if it comes approval and "love". Look at people in … [Read more...]

Who Was That Masked Man? Part 4

by Calulu   When we last left this story every couple in our little circle of friends from church had been exposed as having at least one cheater.  Things don't get any better ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Months pass , everything, everyone continues in a warped state of stalemate. Tom has been dumped by Alice but doesn't come home to Tina. He moves on to a series of girlfriends picked up in karaoke bars after he starts spending all his night time hours at karaoke. He starts drinking heavily before moving on to smoking reefer. All the while singing really bad songs from the early and mid 60s every night at the local karaoke bars. Tina serenely states that he will come … [Read more...]

Millipede: Part 4

control

by Millipede Although the "dress code" was the most glaring example of our changing mindset.There were other changes which were just as bad if not worse in the long run. My husband started to implement "order in the home". Although not as extreme as the other men, he considered himself the head of the household. Sure, I could argue, but if he stuck to his guns on something, I was expected to follow. I could be stubborn, but there were plenty of things that I gave way. Dressing in skirts out in public wasn't the only one. Staying at home, I let him control the finances. Sure, I could give advice, nag and so on, but in the end, he decided all things. A lot of things happened that in … [Read more...]

Millipede: Part 3

modesty

by Millipede My story continued... Things were exciting in the beginning. What married woman wouldn't be happy that her husband was "getting religion". With fidelity, love, hard work and a host of other laudable virtues to be practiced by a believer it was a dream come true. It was at that time, even in the early days before the new church group began that I noticed things. Back then as the patriot activities waned and our religious interest was catching fire, distance kept us from attending home church with our new circle of friends. So we did the next best thing which was attend church locally. Even if we didn't agree with all of the doctrine, we still enjoyed the … [Read more...]

Unwrapping the Onion: Part 6: Talk of Transition

This post is part of a series of nine posts. Please click here to start with the series Introduction. Even though we had hoped that it would be enough for my spouse to simply be more authentic to his feminine self, it seemed that the idea of transition was coming up more and more. My spouse talked about how frustrating it was to have this battle raging in his head every single day, his brain telling him again and again that he was really a woman. He told me how the idea of becoming an old man terrified him. It was bad enough being trapped in the body of a young man, but to be old and helpless and cared for by people who would treat him as a guy was dreadful to him. Sometimes he cried, all … [Read more...]

Unwrapping the Onion: Part 3: A Growing Up Story

by Permission to Live Before I go any further I just want to make it clear that my spouse has participated in the writing and editing of this series, and has given their full support and approval of it's publication. This post is part of a series of nine posts. Please click here to start with the series Introduction. Over the next number of months it seemed that we talked about transgender questions and issues constantly. My spouse had been unable to talk about this for so long and now it was like a floodgate had opened. He told me about how he had always felt different, that even as a small child he wished he could play with some of the girls’ toys and wondered why he couldn’t … [Read more...]

Unwrapping the Onion: Part 1: A Secret Revealed

by Permission to Live This post is part of a series of nine posts. Please click here to start with the series Introduction. As many of you know, my spouse and I got married young after a short parent-supervised courtship. We began our marriage “the right way” according to everything we believed. We had obeyed our parents and stayed pure from emotional relationships or sexual activity, so when we got married neither of us had ever been intimate with any other person. We were wholeheartedly committed to our Christian beliefs at that time, feeling certain that birth control was wrong in almost any circumstance and that men should be the family leaders and women should be submissive. … [Read more...]

Sex Confessions and the Single Fundy: Adventures in Recovery

by Calulu (or be careful who you tell your secrets to..) Bless me Father for I have sinned... told you I'd been raised Catholic. One of the big rituals from my days in Catholic school was the time of confession. At first I found it frightening, going into that big wooden closet-like structure, sitting down with only a metal grill separating you from a priest. You usually couldn't make out exactly which Father was hearing your confession. It was always awkward, trying to scare up a list of all the bad stuff you'd done that week. I was a shy bookish young girl and nervously squirmed in the confessional trying to come up with my wrong doings, only to sometimes whisper out stuff I … [Read more...]


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