Millipede: Part 19

straw

by MillipedeMy story continued; The Final Straw.Spring came and with it came another problem. After having been married so long, I figured that I had seen all of the "issues" that my husband had. The disregard for his health, the laziness, the ability to let his faults put us in dire circumstances. I thought I knew them all. Evidently not.Simply put, my husband had developed an alcohol problem.To backtrack, we had never been teetotalers. Even after having gotten involved in the Patriarchy movement, we never abstained from alcohol completely. While both churches had followed a lot of Fundamentalists doctrines, neither condemned alcohol use. In fact many of our church friends … [Read more...]

Jack Schaap: Villain or Victim?

jackschaap

Update on the ongoing scandal without the Independent Baptist Church in Hammond, Indiana.Seems that with every passing day there has been increasingly odd new stories coming out about the real reasons Jack Schaap has been asked to step down from his pastorate position at the First Baptist Church in Hammond, Indiana. Some of his supporters are trying to spin it as if he were the victim of a wicked, wily, horny teenage girl, that old 'blame the victim' mentality that hinges on modesty issues most of the time.But there were hints that Jack Schaap was not quite right before this incident came to light. Like the strange things that were said during his last sermon at First Baptist Church. … [Read more...]

Millipede Part 16

transformation

by MillipedeMy story continued.......We were free from the world of Patriarchal religion. On a personal level, I began to blossom. I was working outside the home, not only paying the bills, but able to save a little money here and there. Gradually, the trappings of the Patriarchal movement fell away. I stopped wearing the Prairie wear, in fact I stopped wearing dresses and skirts altogether. I started listening to Rock music and even started listening to Heavy Metal again.My husband was headed down another path. He was adrift, like a rudderless ship he had no direction. We had a few Sundays where we did some Scripture readings in an attempt to have a "home Church" but they … [Read more...]

The Marriage Benefits of Leaving Fundamentalism

by LatebloomerIf I had stayed within the constraints of fundamentalism and Christian Patriarchy, my husband and I would absolutely not be happily married today. Our relationship from the very beginning consisted of many departures from the teachings I grew up with. Each of those departures furthered the development, health, and mutual happiness of our relationship.The first departure: As a single woman, I moved out of my parents' home to get a college education. What is a completely ordinary step for many North American women was a desperate and terrifying leap for me. My family's homeschooling church, led by Reb Bradley, promoted a very restrictive view of gender roles along with a … [Read more...]

Daughter of the Patriarchy: Stuart of the Lovely Locks

 This is an installment of the Daughter of the Patriarchy series. Read the rest here.A couple of days after moving onto campus, Molly informed me that she was expecting a visitor. He was a friend from her Dungeons and Dragons group, coming by to pick up one of his books from their last game. Molly called him “Stuart of the Lovely Locks.”I turned around. “What?”“He has long hair,” she explained. “And it’s gorgeous. I just want to pet his hair all the time.”Of all the weird bonding moments. “I like long hair on guys,” I said shyly, and buried my face in a book. A sequence of long-haired men danced through my brain. I imagined the hair cascading down to his waist, li … [Read more...]

Raised Quiverfull: A Gendered Childhood Part 1

by Libby AnneRaised Quiverfull Introduction — A Gendered ChildhoodQuestion 1: How many siblings did you grow up with? Did responsibilities in your family differ by gender, with the girls having certain chores and the boys having others? Explain.Joe:My Mama was a very unique woman.  I’ll explain in a bit.  But first, I was the dead middle child of seven siblings.  The oldest was a girl, then twin boys, then me, then two more girls, and finally, the baby of the family, a boy.  If you’re familiar with any movies or television shows, you might see that it is regularly portrayed that siblings hate each other.  Especially boys hating on girls and the other way around.  Due … [Read more...]

Daughter of the Patriarchy: Safe Now

by SierraPrincesses do NOT eat turkey legs.A month after my acceptance, I was moving onto campus for my first autumn semester at Rowling College.* Most of my community college credits had transferred, leaving me a semester ahead of that year’s incoming freshmen. The same summer, my mother and I had finally filled out the paperwork to get me a diploma from a Pennsylvania homeschooling agency. I was deeply self-conscious about the 2005 stamp on my diploma; it was an emblem of what I perceived as failure, as my other homeschooled friends liked to boast about graduating early, and I was a year late. I also desperately wanted to be part of a group of people my age, for once, s … [Read more...]

Revisiting Tapati’s Body Image Workshop: Day One Assignment

by TapatiFind some images online, in card shops, in books or magazines, or elsewhere of women (or men) whose body type resembles your own. It’s OK if this project takes more than one day, but spend at least 15 minutes per day on it until you have assembled several images. You might color-copy or scan some images if you go to the library to find them. When it comes to magazines, you might look in something other than fashion-oriented issues. Try everything from National Geographic to alternative press titles. Pagan magazines are a good bet for a variety of images.Older woman can find some wonderful images in a deck of cards entitled “Wisdom of the Crone.” You can find them … [Read more...]

Revisiting Tapati’s Body Image Workshop: Why Body Image Matters

by Tapati(Editorial note: after all this talk of modesty and body image I felt this is the right time to revisit Tapati''s entire Body Image Workshop. We all need to be reminded we're beautiful just as we are.)My involvement with the issue of body image came out of my encounter with the size acceptance movement in the late 1980s. I was fortunate enough to meet Ruah Bull, a body image educator. I had never heard of such a thing but soon I was exposed to her classes at Cabrillo College in Aptos, California. She had studied with body image guru Marcia Hutchinson and had joined with other large women to form a radical group that occasionally defaced billboards with thin models and … [Read more...]

Defrauding: The NLQ Buzzword Project

wholesome-wear

by CaluluI have to admit. I too, just like Sierra, have a problem with Michelle Duggar and her recent comments on the beach and clothing that doesn't fall into the realm of her idea of modesty.These are the only Duggar-approved swimwear available. You might as well be wearing a burkini, at least the burkini is more attractive and modest than these things.Doesn't everyone want to look like a school cafeteria lady at the beach?Here's my rant about it. I never made it to the intellectual depths that Sierra did on the long term repercussions for the Duggar children. It struck me as more of the 'Sex on the brain' syndrome that certain strains of fundamentalism seems to dwell … [Read more...]


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