Recognizing Pervasive, Poisonous Power in Marriage

by Virginia Knowles cross posted from her blog Watch The Shepherd “There are two kinds of power. One kills the spirit. The other nourishes the spirit. The first is Power Over. The other is Personal Power. Power Over shows up as control and dominance. Personal Power shows up as mutuality and co-creation. Mutuality is a way of being with a person which promotes the growth and well-being of one's self and the other person by means of clear communication and empathetic understanding. Co-creation is a consciously shared participation in life which helps one reach one's goals.” … [Read more...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Part 3 – Beat Your Lying Liar Child?

by Michael Pearl from No Greater Joy – The Selfishness of a Tender HeartEditor's note: Notice that the words spanking or a little switching never appeared anywhere in this piece. Only the Pearl euphemisms that mean the same thing - training and discipline. I suspect that he rarely uses the correct words for his type of toxic discipline because of some of his followers like the Schatzs and the Williams. Protect the brand and revenue stream above all else no matter what their advice is doing to the children of their followers. … [Read more...]

Answering ‘Preparing To Be A Help Meet’ – Biblical Divorce Because Of Abuse?

Another installment of giving better answers to the questions asked at Debi Pearl’s site message board for the book ‘Preparing To Be A Help Meet’. Many young ladies ask questions on all sorts of different subjects brought up by the book. There was just one big problem, many of the answers stray into either the outright bad and emotionally unhealthy to dangerous. Yes, typical Debi Pearl borderline abusive. Here’s what we’re going to be doing here at NLQ. Every week, once or twice a week, I’ll be posting up one of the questions from the message board and ask you, our readers, to answer that poor soul’s question in a way that is logical,  rational and the best possible solution, in other words 1 … [Read more...]

NLQ Question of the Week: Is Quiverfull Inherently Racist?

This is a new series we have started running on Thursdays. Examining some of the questions involving long held Quiverfull theology and life.Today's question comes out of a discussion I recently had with a journalist about Quiverfull. She wanted to know if I thought it was geared more toward whites and not other races. Told her while there are some of other races that take part, such as Voddie Baucham, for the most part there does seem to be a tendency towards racism. … [Read more...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Do Not Report Child Sexual Abuse to Authorities?

by Michael Pearl from No Greater joy - Twelve Year Old MolesterEditor's note: A mother writes in about the molestation of her friend's child by another child and Michael says do not report this to law enforcement? He seems to be completely unaware that their pastor is a mandatory reporter under the law and that if the offender is doing this because she may have been molested in the past that by involving the law she might be able to receive treatment from a qualified childrens therapist to help her move past her problems. How is covering all this up helpful to anyone? … [Read more...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Women Should Have No Rights?

by Steven L. Anderson as quoted by Church and State - Conservative Pastor Preaches That Women Should Be Banned From Voting And Confined To Their HomesEditor's note: Just like Larry Solomon of Biblical Gender Roles Steven Anderson wants women to be owned property, owned by their husbands without any say or rights over their own lives. Very complimentarian and fundamentalist, this type of thinking sets up an environment where spousal abuse flourishes. … [Read more...]

Religious Child Abuse: An Unending Source of Sadness

by M. Dolon Hickmon author of the book '13:24 - A Story of Faith and Obsession'In addition to supernatural benefits, religions often promise what amounts to a program of self-improvement. Ingredients may include prayer, studying scripture and attending regular meetings. Such paths often also call for personal sacrifice, whether in the form of tithes and offerings or through performing unpaid labor such as proselytizing door-to-door. For their efforts, the faithful are promised an array of tangible and intangible remunerations: health and wealth, relief of depression or anxiety, eternal life and so forth. For many, one particularly alluring promise is that of a fool-proof formula for … [Read more...]

Quoting Quiverfull: African Americans Are The ‘Real Racists’?

by Zsuzsanna Anderson from her blog Are They All Yours? - Joyous Kwanzaa? No Thanks!Editor's note: Every now and then one of the Quiverfull leaders will slip up and state that one of the aims of the Quiverfull movement is to outbreed darker races. Nancy Campbell has admitted it a couple of times along with a few others. Turns out, surprise, surprise, that Zsuzsanna Anderson, wife of pastor Steven L. Anderson is also a bigot against blacks. … [Read more...]

Bonding and Bondage in Abusive Relationships

by Virginia Knowles cross posted from her blog Watch the ShepherdIn case you're wondering why you can't "just get over it" from a painfully abusive or damaging or destructive relationship: Trauma bonding makes any relationship harder to end, harder to heal, harder to find freedom from through forgiveness, than the loss of a true love. The neural pathways burned into a brain in trauma bonding are laid down in powerful fear/anxiety hormonal rushes leaving even comparatively good memories with the person colored with the stains of those traumatic events. The loss of anyone we have loved -- whether they have treated us very well indeed or in a deplorable manner -- is something that will heal … [Read more...]

How Should Churches Handle Allegations of Abuse?

by Bruce Gerencser cross posted from his blog The Life and Times of Bruce GerencserHow should churches handle allegations of abuse? Let me state right up front that I do not think churches shouldn’t “handle” anything.  This is what gets churches, pastors, and church leaders into trouble to start with. Instead of immediately doing the right thing when someone makes an allegation of abuse, pastors and church members often: … [Read more...]


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