So I’ve Been Spiritually Abused, What Next?: The Narcissistic Pastor – How to Recognize a Spiritual Abuser

from the website An Irenicon - The Narcissistic PastorSo what does the narcissistic pastor look like?  I’m a humble person, so I’ll merely recount the characteristics of narcissism as identified by Sam Vaknin (himself diagnosed with Narcissistic Personality Disorder). His thoughts are in bold. Like I said I’m too humble to know any of this firsthand. Having worked, lived, confided for, and studied with many pastors, however, I know that it touches our profession intimately. Comments following the boldface reflect my actual experiences working in the church. … [Read more...]

News: Duggars Dealing With Bill Gothard Fallout

Jezebel.Com has written a horribly funny but thought-provoking  piece on the changes through the years in the Duggar family along with how they are answering the criticisms for following Bill "Grabby Hands" Gothard - How are the Duggars dealing with the Gothard Sex Scandal?So, what follows may be the greatest Duggar based conspiracy theory that you've read this month. Ok, it's not that great but it's a theory. Now, it is well known among Gothard's that the kind of crunchy, curly home-permed hair favored by Michelle and the clan in the early season is based on preferences of Gothard, who loved long, wavy womanly hair and damn the woman who does not possess sacred this crown. Now it may … [Read more...]

Preparing To Be A Help Meet – Background Information

by Mel cross posted from her blog When Cows and Kids CollideI've been learning about the Pearls for the last two years as I've learned more about the Christian Patriarchy movement.    I have found Michael and Debi's books to be laughably bad - at best- and horribly abusive at worst. … [Read more...]

Male Headship and the Problem of Power

by Kristen Rosser cross posted from her blog Wordgazer's WordsSeveral people have asked me privately to follow up on the radio conversation I participated in on Up For Debate last weekend on the topic "Does God Expect Men to be Spiritual Leaders?"  They asked me to focus specifically on what was said by the caller-in named "Linda."The comments on my blog post about the radio show also were focused on that portion of the broadcast-- so I will say now what I wish I had been prepared and had time to say then. … [Read more...]

The Six Inch Rule: Thou Shalt Not Touch

by Bruce Genercser cross posted from his blog The Way ForwardImagine for a moment, that you are sitting in the pew of an Independent Fundamentalist Baptist (IFB) church. You are 16 years old and sitting next to you is your 17-year-old girlfriend. Like normal teenagers, you are sitting as close as possible to your girlfriend and you are discreetly, cleverly holding handsThe pastor is getting ready to preach and he asks everyone to turn to 1 Corinthians 7:1,2. With a thunderous voice, the pastor says, THE BIBLE SAYS: … [Read more...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Killer Babies?

by Voddie Bauchaum from the sermon 'The Doctrine of Depravity' "One of the reasons that God makes human babies small is so they won't kill their parents in their sleep. They're evil. Yes, this is true of children. 'None is righteous; no, not one.'…Yes, that little, precious one—you better believe it. If you don't, you miss the big picture and you don't realize your desperate need to get the gospel to your child again and again and again and again." … [Read more...]

Quoting Quiverfull: When Patriarchals Misunderstand What ‘Taliban’ Means?

by Adam Gregorin from his blog Minthegap - Fundamentalist Atheists -  America's Taliban However, there is a vocal minority of Atheists (I term them Fundamentalist Atheists) that seek to eradicate all religion, and these are the focus of this article.It doesn’t take long reading Fundamentalist Atheist’s thoughts to find that they believe that Christians are the American version of the Taliban.  They trot out the ideas that Christians are behind unequal rights for gays and telling women what to do with their bodies, and compare that to the Taliban telling women that they are of no worth and that they must veil themselves from head to toe. … [Read more...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Marital Sexual Consent Isn’t Real?

by Free Northerner from his blog Free Northerner- Marital Consent Marriage is a a contract between two people, in which love, of which sex is an implied and fundamental component, is promised to the other. This contract is vowed for life and is binding for life.With sex being so vowed to the other, sexual consent is given for life by contract. … [Read more...]

How I Was Almost Rescued from Abuse

by Sarah Henderson cross posted from her blog Feminist in Spite of ThemA few months I wrote a post called Navigating the Justice System Part 1: Alone at 9 Years Old. This post is the story of what it was like for me to experience a Children's Aid investigation and a court case, from my perspective as a child. It skips pretty quickly over what the social workers were like and what they did, and I didn't talk very much about the involvement of other agencies and groups. … [Read more...]

Quoting Quiverfull: Being an Abused Woman Makes You Sinful?

by Jennifer Tritle at and cross posted at Ladies Against Feminism - Joy as a Tool of Dominion For the Abused Woman Consider this scenario: Various women are abused as children. They grow up in conscious or unconscious guilt and shame. They subtly or ostensibly manifest fear, bitterness, depression, masochistic dependency, and/or sadistic domineering behaviors in their personalities. Undiscipled Christian men are attracted for various conscious and unconscious reasons to … [Read more...]