Coming Out of the Cult Closet

be love

by AJ cross posted from her blog I Am PhoenixThe last year has been full of shifts, most of them tumultuous, but most of them ending up being quite positive. In the actual moment, each change didn't feel positive. It felt like I was wearing skin that didn't fit me anymore, and I was trying to wrestle out of it. Much like a critter shedding it's old skin. Painful, itchy, uncomfortable, exhausting. But then each time I shed an old layer, it felt great afterwards to relax and sit in the sun, so to speak with spanking new skin that felt all new and glowing. … [Read more...]

CTBHHM: Don’t Talk To Me About Pain!

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by Libby Anne cross posted from her blog Love, Joy, FeminismCreated To Be His Help Meet, pp. 168—170We’re still in Debi’s chapter on love sex, remember. In case you’re wondering, there will be two more weeks of devoted to this chapter. Next week will cover a few more letters from fans, and the week after will cover “sexual perversions.” So, let’s get started on this week’s section! Trigger warning for abuse and marital rape. In this section, Debi explains sex and men’s need for it—and women’s “duty” to provide it—and it’s not pretty. … [Read more...]

Stand Up and Speak Your Truth

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by AJ cross posted from her blog I Am PhoenixI have always had a hard time standing up for myself. I chalk it up to the way I grew up. I grew up in a cult where women and children weren't allowed to speak up for themselves, especially when we were abused. We weren't allowed to ask "Why?" even in a quiet voice. We were to take abuse quietly, submissively, like Godly females would. Otherwise, all hell would break loose. So, my sisters and I grew up with blank, obedient minds. We were trained to obey male authority without question, and we had a healthy fear of the chain of command above us. We were Godly, submissive sheep who obeyed at the blink of an eye. We grew up with no defenses … [Read more...]

Pensacola Christian College & Me

my-little-pony-clapping-seal

by Samantha Field cross posted from her blog Defeating The DragonsIf you’ve never meandered around xoJane, well, now is your golden opportunity. I’ve been a loyal reader for almost a year now, and it’s a pretty cool place. So, when an xoJane editor reached out to me and asked if I’d be willing to tell a piece of my story for them, you can imagine that my reaction looked a bit like this: … [Read more...]

Triggers: So I Was Spiritually Abused, What Next?

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We're starting a new series called "So I Was Spiritually Abused, What Next" with posts about healing, explaining some of the things most people that walk away from spiritual abuse suffer from after leaving as well as information on healing from abuse. We invite anyone that wants to write a post for this series to email Suzanne, NLQ Moderator/Admin at CaluluNLQ(at)gmail(dot)com. … [Read more...]

Then and Now

brokenumbrella

by AJ cross posted from her blog I Am PhoenixI'm becoming more and more aware that I don't need to "aware" of my beliefs in order for them to affect my life.My beliefs shape the way my life is branching out right at this very moment, even if many of these beliefs were formed many years ago and I don't give them much thought today. … [Read more...]

Not Quoting Quiverfull: What is a Cult? Church of Wells Edition

churchofwells

According to the Wartburg Watch and Ronald Enroth's book "Church That Abuse" the hallmarks of a cult are - 1.   Control-oriented style of leadership2.   Spiritual elitism3.   Manipulation of members … [Read more...]

CTBHHM: Talk to Your Husband About How You Feel? Ha!

created

by Libby Anne cross posted from her blog Love Joy FeminismCreated To Be His Help Meet, pp. 147-148This chapter starts out fairly tame by Debi’s standards . . . and then turns into a train reck before you have a chance to so much as blink. As a reminder, Debi is now going through the various character traits that Titus 2 instructs the older women to teach to the younger women. This installment begins Debi’s chapter titled “To Be Sober.” … [Read more...]

CTBHHM: Earning Your Abuser’s Trust

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by Libby Anne cross posted from her blog Love Joy Feminism***trigger warning for domestic violence***This section is called “Earning His Trust,” and calling it that is messed up on about three million levels, as we shall see. It is the story of a young woman named Sunny. … [Read more...]

Spiritual Abuse and Whitewashed Marriage

regretfulbride

by Mere Dreamer cross posted from her blog Love is Not Equal to Love(Editor’s note: Please welcome Mere Dreamer to NLQ and the SASBN! Another great addition to our group!)I grew up in a 3rd world mission where the horror stories of Northern news overshadowed all other impressions of the US, though I determined to move there after graduation in spite of the fear. My 17 year old, culture-shocked self feared the six block walk from the school to work, morbidly certain it was inevitable that I would be kidnapped and raped. … [Read more...]


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