Millipede Part 32 How Did I Get Here? Part 3

howdidIget here

by MillipedeIn my case, the path started when I became involved in various "patriot" groups.Ironically, I was at first very careful to weed out the chauvinists and the misogynists. How women were viewed and treated was a make or break issue with me. My husband at the time was like most "average" guys meaning that he believed(or claimed to) gender equality to some degree. As in my previous experience, it was a mixed bag, some people were great, but sure enough we ran into a few rabid patriarchs. I remember one man, a preacher saying that women who were serving in the army ought to be ashamed of themselves and should instead, be at home changing diapers. Afterwords, my husband and I … [Read more...]

Millipede Part 31 – How Did I Get Here Part 2

endoftheroad

by MillipedeThe path to Patriarchy is often a convoluted one. Embracing of Patriarchal beliefs is usually not the original intent, but is often the "byproduct" of one's attempt to embrace a particular religion and/ or ideology.This is important to remember, few women are quick to jump on a bandwagon which promotes a society in which women have few or no rights. However, finding themselves presented with a series of agreeable answers to various concerns will act as a compass which eventually leads the seeker to a particular brand of patriarchy.In more down to earth terms, proponents of patriarchy know they have a tough sell. After all, what woman in their right of mind is going to … [Read more...]

Millipede: Part 28

by MillipedeAs January gave way to February, I noticed that my ex and I spoke for shorter lengths of time. He seemed busy. I didn't give it much though, after all we were just friends and nothing more.Then came the day that we had meet at the courthouse to renew our homesteader's tax credit. Although I had been paying the property taxes, since we had both our names still on the title, we both had to sign the renewal forms. As the matter has now become a legal one, I must be mindful of what I type. Suffice it to say, my ex suddenly denied ever agreeing to certain things pertaining to property division, things that we had BOTH agreed on when we broke up. In fact he was making a grab … [Read more...]

“Biblical” Parenting, Criticism #2: An Extremely Controlling Parent

by LatebloomerTo briefly review, my first criticism of Reb Bradley's book "Child Training Tips" discussed the way his advice pushed parents toward the worst possible interpretation of their child's behavior at the expense of mercy and understanding.  Now here is my second criticism.Criticism #2:   Parents are urged to exercise an extreme level of control of their child's mind and body, which prevents the child from preparing for adulthood.  Reb Bradley is very straightforward about what he considers the primary task of a parent.  Several times throughout the book, he reminds parents that their goal is to subdue their child's will: "keep your objective in mind - subjection of the … [Read more...]

Millipede Part 17

steeple

by MillipedeThis time around it was different on the surface at least. My husband was trying a kinder and gentler approach to his faith. Rather than trying to make his wife follow behind him in the old Patriarchy Parade, my husband was content to go to church by himself. He did encourage me to go and on the infrequent occasions that I did, he would make a point of being considerate of me.Even so, I did not make plans to attend on a regular basis, even with my husband willing to leave when I was ready, it was usually about three in the afternoon when we left church. Given that it took over an hour to get there, the day was mostly over when we got home. Also, this pastor believed that … [Read more...]

Millipede Part 15

outside-looking-in-12-14-10

by MillipedeI watched in the oncoming month as my husband's church world came apart. Everything carried a taint of the break; sermons where a new point of view was explained, the fellowship afterwards that was a shadow of its former self. I watched as my husband hung back while our pastor conversed with the other families, the passing hours no longer found found my husband in a tight circle of men fervently talking theology. With the spell of close friendship broken, my husband started leaving early, sometimes within the hour after service.I felt sorry for him, it's sad to see someone's dream crash about them. On the other hand.....I couldn't wait to get out the door. Years of … [Read more...]

Raised Quiverfull: A Gendered Childhood Part 1

by Libby AnneRaised Quiverfull Introduction — A Gendered ChildhoodQuestion 1: How many siblings did you grow up with? Did responsibilities in your family differ by gender, with the girls having certain chores and the boys having others? Explain.Joe:My Mama was a very unique woman.  I’ll explain in a bit.  But first, I was the dead middle child of seven siblings.  The oldest was a girl, then twin boys, then me, then two more girls, and finally, the baby of the family, a boy.  If you’re familiar with any movies or television shows, you might see that it is regularly portrayed that siblings hate each other.  Especially boys hating on girls and the other way around.  Due … [Read more...]

Baptist Taliban: Part 5

by Cindy FosterTHE SHUNNINGThis ‘discipline‘ as it turned out was not discipline at all, but punishment which had the appearance of one acting to satisfy his wrath against those who resisted or opposed him. He actually commanded the whole church to SHUN these young people for varying periods of time from 2 weeks to 6 weeks according to the severity of their ‘crimes’. There was only one given 6 weeks, and that was for making the statement about his not disciplining them unless he disciplined the others. This he said was the worst offense of all because that person was, “Making an accusation against a pastor without witnesses”. This person was also suspended from coming to church a … [Read more...]

Who Was That Masked Man: Part 10

by CaluluIt seemed like the conferences and teachings were helping Tom even if he was still having his moments of weirdness and dysfunction.And then my darling husband started skipping our church's Sunday School to attend the early service at a big mainstream denomination before coming for to our church for our service. The questions started. I didn't quite know how to answer them because I didn't quite know exactly what was going on in my husband's mind. I knew he was unhappy with our church and visiting the denomination he'd been raised in was comforting to him, like going to the Catholic Charismatic services were to me when I visited down home in Louisiana. But I didn't really … [Read more...]

Millipede Part 11

millipede11

by MillipedeEverything seemed to be righting itself, it was tough, but we were on our way. Things would be tight and they were somewhat different now. Seeing how my husband acted after losing his job had really struck a blow to our relationship. I had always known that my husband could be lazy and not given to "worrying about money". However, I had always thought that when the stakes were really high that even he would come through. Seeing how my husband reacted to his job loss changed all of that.The few attempts at even looking for a job ( two tries) and then sitting back and just being content to sell things until he ran out. I thought of all the sit down jobs for those with little … [Read more...]


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