Before There Was Me: Part 2

by Mari Before we go any further in my story, we must introduce the church. My parents attended a church called Meadow Ridge Bible Chapel (henceforth known as “chapel”) in West Fargo, North Dakota. I’m not familiar with the history of this church, nor with which (if any) denomination the church is affiliated. By the time I came along, chapel was located in a very nice building in West Fargo. When you arrived, you would walk into a lobby area that had restrooms and a coat room. Then you would walk through beautiful double doors into the chapel area. The chapel was square with a bookstore and a nursing moms’ room in the back. Also along the back wall was a bookcase with stacks … [Read more...]

News Links September 5, 2012

Sometimes churches need to be reminded that if they campaign for a certain party or candidate they put their tax exempt status at risk - ChicoER - Editorial: Church runs afoul of rules There's an interesting article by Jenny Rae Armstrong over at Red Letter Christians about Patriarchy, Pop Culture, and Pornograpy Thoughts on handling a large family after leaving Quiverfull Patriarch world far behind. Recovering from Religion - When the Grass Looks Greener Elsewhere- Be Sure the Fertilizer Works in Your Yard! And for anyone that needs a reminder of poisonous and destructive Patriarchy and Quiverfull beliefs can be just one quick read through the Duggar-approved 7 Basic Needs of a … [Read more...]

Millipede: Part 25

by Millipede Things settled down. My ex took the breakup in stride. We both talked about remaining friends. Now that I didn't have to be his caretaker/servant/mom (what a strange combo) I felt better. No longer was dread a daily companion, I was free from all of that. We both did the "let's stay friends" bit. It seemed like that it might work. My ex seemed to have adapted wonderfully to the fact that we were splitting up. He even looked at options whereby he would move out so as to save me the trouble of moving. Things didn't work out, but at least he was being considerate. We got along better, now that the tension was down. I was ready to take my time, save my money for the … [Read more...]

Ann Romney’s Gendered Martyrdom: Women and Children First?

by Sierra Ann Romney cooking – you know, like she has to. Because she’s a lady. Credit isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. I’m not talking about your credit score or the plastic in your wallet. I’m talking about public accolades. I’m talking about the river of molten gold that comes out of the mouths of people like Ann Romney when describing (what used to be) “women’s work.” Before I go any further, I want to promote an excellent article by Mark Greene at MegaSAHD that challenges the ugly view of masculinity and the outdated, Leave-it-to-Beaver family structure that Ann Romney took for granted in yesterday’s RNC speech. He’s absolutely right: men are … [Read more...]

Millipede Part 24 – The Breakup

shattered

by Millipede The next day I got up. As I showered and got dressed I thought of the previous night's events. I was tired, a bit worried, but mostly resolved. I was going to have a final talk with my husband; lay the cards on the table concerning our future. The discussion started as others had before with me sharing my concerns about my husband's drinking. Of course, my husband denied that he had a problem and our argument followed the trail. It was clear to me as we argued, that my husband was in his usual denial mode and I knew what that meant for the future. I couldn't not live under that sort of stress. It was time to act. I told my husband that if this was how he felt about the … [Read more...]

Millipede Part 23

split

by Millipede The moment of truth came one Saturday night. No surprises there. Of course, my husband had decided to have something to drink. I abstained of course, someone would have to be ready to call 911. Even though the any possible seizure would not occur until the following day, a 400+ pound man could get into a lot of trouble if he fell of his chair during a nodding phase. Plus, who knows, this time the seizure might come earlier. Things were going well as expected. The slurring had started just a bit and my husband nodded off only once. off had. My husband mixed another drink which he said would be his last of the night. I watched with relief as he finished the cup. We had … [Read more...]

NLQ FAQ Revisited: How can I help my “Quiverfull” friend?

by Vyckie   Q: How can I help my “Quiverfull” friend? I have a good friend who is really into the quiverfull/patriarchy lifestyle. She is always careful to appear cheerful and happy with her family life, but I have often suspected that things are not quite as rosy as she wants everyone to believe. After reading the stories here on NLQ, I am more concerned than ever, especially for her children who are very well-behaved and respectful but who seem to be sending out “distress signals” like Angel did in Vyckie’s story. My friend is slowly cutting out everyone who loves her and has offered to help. What can I do? There are two important factors to consider in this … [Read more...]

Biology 101 Anyone?

jawdrop

by Calulu When I first read the headline this weekend I was incredulous. I sat there dumb founded just staring at the screen, not believing what I was reading, this newest cannon volley that is the  war on women and women's reproductive rights. Sadly it wasn't a joke. This is what I saw - Republican Senate Nominee: Victims of 'Legitimate Rape' Don't Get Pregnant Surely even the most scantily educated people in this country wouldn't fall for such an obvious falsehood. Or at least anyone that's taken basic biology at the high school level would know this was simply not true. Our bodies are no different than other mammals in that respect. Conception happens if the conditions are right … [Read more...]

Millipede Part 22

by Millipede Amidst all the craziness with the alcohol, there was yet another worrying development which had crept up. As I mentioned before, my marriage had developed two fronts;one being my husband's self destructive propensities and the second which came later, that being his embrace of religious Patriarchy. The booze crisis came in with a flash, but that didn't mean that trouble wasn't brewing on the ol' Patriarchy front. Despite his new alcohol problem, my husband remained devoutly involved with the church. It was bitterly ironic and a testament to his hypocrisy, but it didn't stop my husband. In fact, I noticed the return of an old attitude, the one where he was lord over the … [Read more...]

My mom is going back to school!

by Sierra (Editors note: Thank you NLQ readership for your part in making this happen! ) Some of you may remember this post, in which I described the frustration of discovering that a clerical error had cost my mom her chance to go back to school for her bachelor’s degree. Leaving for school and realizing that my mother would not be able to get her degree felt a lot like survivor’s guilt. I was the only one on a clear path out of poverty. She threw her support behind me, and I did the only thing I could do: studied hard to make it up to her. Now, years later, a stubborn daughter, a website, a loan and a very generous group of donors have changed the tide. My mother is going back … [Read more...]


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