NLQ FAQ: The Bible and Male Headship – Part 2

October 13, 2010 By 14 Comments

by Kristen Rosser ~ aka: KR Wordgazer

The question being asked in Part 1 was:

Doesn’t the Bible say the man is the head of the woman and that the husband is the head of the house, the instrument of God for directing the family? Isn’t he God’s designated authority, the one God holds responsible for all decision-making on behalf of the couple and their children?

With the understanding from Part 1, of how the covenant community of the church fits into the Bible’s Great Story as a redeemed spiritual family– a family in which all Christians are brothers and sisters and God is our Father– let’s begin now to examine some of the passages that refer to men as “head.” As discussed in “Quiverfull and the Bible,” we will look at the cultural assumptions that would have been shared between a writer of a New Testament Epistle and the original audience, in order to see how the message might have been heard differently by them than it sounds to us today.. Hand-in-hand with this, we must look carefully at what the original audience would have understood the Greek word translated as “head” to actually mean.

Beginning, then, with the most frequently cited “headship” passage, Ephesians 5:21-22:

“Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God. Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the savior of the body.”

In the Epistle to the Ephesians, Paul’s big theme is who the church is “in Christ.” The first three chapters are about the church’s salvation, adoption, spiritual position and unity. In the fourth and fifth chapters he goes on to speak of how unity is to be maintained in the way individual members relate to one another. It is into this context that he places the section on how members of individual households are to relate to one another. This type of teaching has come to be known as a “household code.” The passage on husbands and wives is part of this code. (See Michael Kruse, “Household of God” online series, “Household: The Household Code,” http://krusekronicle.typepad.com/kruse_kronicle/2007/07/household-the-h.html )

Filed Under: Bible Interpretation, Biblical Culture, Biblical Manhood & Womanhood, Coercive Religious Groups (Cults), Complimentarianism, Cultural vs. Normative, Domestic Abuse, Dominionism / Christian Reconstruction, Fundamentalism, Gender Equality, Hupotasso, Issues, Male Headship, NLQ FAQs, Pater Familias, Patriarchy, Quiverfull & the Bible, Quiverfull Counterculture, Quiverfull Discernment, Quiverfull Topics, Spiritual Abuse & Recovery, Spiritual Issues, Submission, Toxic Relationships, Umbrella of Authority Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , 14 Comments

NLQ FAQ: The Bible and Male Headship – Part 1

October 11, 2010 By 4 Comments

by Kristen Rosser ~ aka: KR Wordgazer

Doesn’t the Bible say the man is the head of the woman and that the husband is the head of the house, the instrument of God for directing the family? Isn’t he God’s designated authority, the one God holds responsible for all decision-making on behalf of the couple and their children?

In “The Bible and the Nature of Women,” the first two chapters of Genesis were explored, making the point that God’s initial plan was not that the man should have “headship” over the woman, but that the man and woman together would have dominion over the Creation. That unity and mutuality was shattered by the Fall. Part of the curse of the Fall, as God told the woman, was “he shall rule over you.”

In “Quiverfull and the Bible” we discussed reading the Bible as a Great Story of creation, fall and redemption. We have seen God’s purpose for male and female in the creation, and what the fall did to their relationship. What does the redemption that comes through Jesus Christ do to the relationship between males and females, husbands and wives?

Filed Under: Biblical Manhood & Womanhood, Coercive Religious Groups (Cults), Male Headship, NLQ FAQs, Pater Familias, Patriarchy, Quiverfull Topics, Spiritual Abuse & Recovery, Submission, Toxic Relationships, Umbrella of Authority Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , 4 Comments

NLQ FAQ: Is No Longer Quivering an Atheist Website?

September 16, 2010 By 19 Comments

by Vyckie

I recently received an email from “Henrietta” who asked:

If I choose to get involved here, contribute etc, am I part of a Christian but anti QFP group; or an anti Christian and esp anti QFP group?

It is ironic that NLQ seems to be perceived quite differently depending on the perspective of the reader. We have several new readers who are commenting here on the blog ~ conservative, Quiverfull Christians who are convinced that NLQ is nothing but angry, pro-abortion, Feminazi Atheists. On the other hand, MoJoey at “Deep Thoughts” recently promoted NLQ with the caveat: Now granted, No Longer Quivering is a Christian site and I don’t normally pimp out the opposition but the woman who runs the site is a loving and tireless worker fighting to free others from a cult. Over at Free Jinger, someone was asking, What’s with all the bible quoting at NLQ?

Considering that No Longer Quivering was recently added to the official Atheist Blogroll ~ Henrietta asks a legitimate question!

I hope it won’t be too frustrating for readers if I don’t answer with a simple “Yes,” or “No.”

Since its beginning in March of 2009, NLQ has grown into a community ~ “a gathering place for women escaping and healing from spiritual abuse.” Most of us have spent years, even decades, twisting and contorting ourselves to fit the narrowly-defined, sharply delineated dogma of whatever particular brand of cult we were caught up in. Although we are a diverse group representing a variety of backgrounds, cultures and beliefs ~ we hold in common the shared experience of being conformed to a rigid system of thought which controlled every aspect of our lives and defined us as women and as (sub)human beings.

We’re here now, regaining our sanity, our sense of self ~ on the path of recovery from deep wounds and spiritual trauma ~ and every one of us is at a different place on that path. That makes us hard to peg ~ and indeed, we resist labels and categories ~ we want to be known for our unique perspectives ~ so it’s not uncommon for NLQ members to write in their introductions, “I am a Christian, but …” or “I believe in God, but …” or “I am an Atheist, but…” ~ this is our way of avoiding being stereotyped as though what we now believe can be labeled, neatly summarized and tied up into a nice, tidy Creedal package.

Filed Under: Atheism, Boundaries, Coercive Religious Groups (Cults), Depression, Drinking the Koolaid, Feminazi, Issues, Mental / Emotional Health, NLQ FAQs, NLQ Miscellany, Patriarchy, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), Quiverfull Discernment, Quiverfull Topics, Self-Abnegation / Martydom, Spiritual Abuse & Recovery, Submission, Take Heart Project, Triggers, Vyckie's Posts Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , 19 Comments

NLQ FAQ: Why Do You Dwell in the Past ~ Why Don't You Just Forgive and Move On?

August 26, 2010 By 11 Comments

by Vyckie

Q: Why Do You Dwell in the Past ~ Why Don’t You Just Forgive and Move On?

Those of us who are sharing our stories of physical, emotional and spiritual abuse at No Longer Quivering are often accused of being bitter and angry.

I frequently receive emails encouraging me to “move on” ~ one writer told me, “You’re out! Good for you. You deserve to be happy, so quit dwelling on past abuse and live and enjoy your life fully in the present.”

I understand this ~ and when Laura chose to stop writing her story here at NLQ because she didn’t want to rehash all the painful memories of abuse ~ and she saw that it was having a harmful effect on her kids ~ and she married Richard and wanted to focus on her new life ~ I was very happy for her. I believe Laura’s example ~ of moving on to a new, happy life ~ is very powerful and inspiring.

Laura’s story brings us hope that the pain and turmoil of leaving an abusive relationship is not forever ~ it is possible to find happiness and not be always controlled and defined by past abuse.

The thing is ~ if we all “move on” then there will be no record ~ no warning. Which is why I’m still here writing and doing what I can in my own way to make a difference. It doesn’t mean that those of us telling our stories are bitter or that we are stuck in the past. In fact, NLQ is all about the future. We write so that the lives of many women which might otherwise have become hell on earth, will instead be free from legalism, self-abnegation and abuse.

Filed Under: A Woman's Choice, Drinking the Koolaid, Issues, Mental / Emotional Health, NLQ FAQs, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), Quiverfull Discernment, Quiverfull Topics, Spiritual Abuse & Recovery, Submission, Take Heart Project, Toxic Relationships, Triggers Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , 11 Comments

NLQ FAQ: The Bible and the Nature of Woman

August 19, 2010 By 10 Comments

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by Kristen Rosser ~ aka: KR Wordgazer

Q: Doesn’t the Bible say I was created to be my husband’s helpmeet, that God designed me to joyfully give myself to my husband’s vision for our family?

To see what God’s plan and purpose for women is, we need to go back to the beginning– Genesis 1. What is the first thing the Bible says about women?

“And God said, Let Us make man in Our image, after Our likeness; and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and . . . over all the earth. So God created man in His own image, in the image of God created He him; male and female created He them. And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it; and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth on the earth.” Gen. 1:26-28.

Is there any distinction made here between the male and the female? No, what we see is identical treatment of the man and the woman, and identical status of the man and the woman before God. He formed them both to be in His image and to have dominion, and then he told them to be fruitful and multiply and rule the other creatures.

Of course we must be careful not to take these commands in an unqualified state. The life and writings of the Apostle Paul make it clear that not every individual must “be fruitful” by having offspring (See “The Bible and Birth Control” for more on this topic.). Indeed, in the New Testament, being “fruitful” in terms of having children is not mentioned; what is important is “bearing fruit,“ which means good character and good deeds that help grow the Kingdom of God. Nor does “subdue the earth” give us the right to mistreat our fellow creatures; we are to be good stewards over the creation. But the important thing to note here is that Genesis Chapter 2 must be read in light of Genesis Chapter 1. The woman, no less than the man, is given rulership. There is no hint in Genesis 1 that the man is to rule over the woman.

Filed Under: Bible Interpretation, Biblical Culture, Biblical Manhood & Womanhood, Complimentarianism, Cultural vs. Normative, Dominionism / Christian Reconstruction, Gender Equality, Headcovering, Help Meet, Issues, Legalism, Male Headship, Mary vs. Martha, Meek and Quiet Spirit, More from NLQ ..., Motherhood, NLQ FAQs, Patriarchy, Psalm 127 / Quiverfull: Be Fruitful & Multiply, Quiverfull & the Bible, Quiverfull Counterculture, Quiverfull Discernment, Quiverfull Topics, Self-Abnegation / Martydom, Spiritual Abuse & Recovery, Spiritual Issues, Stewardship, Submission, The Godly Woman, Umbrella of Authority Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , 10 Comments