Millipede Part 24 – The Breakup

shattered

by MillipedeThe next day I got up. As I showered and got dressed I thought of the previous night's events. I was tired, a bit worried, but mostly resolved. I was going to have a final talk with my husband; lay the cards on the table concerning our future.The discussion started as others had before with me sharing my concerns about my husband's drinking. Of course, my husband denied that he had a problem and our argument followed the trail. It was clear to me as we argued, that my husband was in his usual denial mode and I knew what that meant for the future. I couldn't not live under that sort of stress. It was time to act.I told my husband that if this was how he felt about the … [Read more...]

Millipede Part 22

by MillipedeAmidst all the craziness with the alcohol, there was yet another worrying development which had crept up.As I mentioned before, my marriage had developed two fronts;one being my husband's self destructive propensities and the second which came later, that being his embrace of religious Patriarchy. The booze crisis came in with a flash, but that didn't mean that trouble wasn't brewing on the ol' Patriarchy front.Despite his new alcohol problem, my husband remained devoutly involved with the church. It was bitterly ironic and a testament to his hypocrisy, but it didn't stop my husband. In fact, I noticed the return of an old attitude, the one where he was lord over the … [Read more...]

Millipede Part 21

heart

by MillipedeThat summer was a mixture of hope, stress and worry.After the first post seizure drinking episodes, my husband admitted that he needed to watch what he drank. He downplayed the symptoms, but even he had to admit that he never used to nod off when he drank. Also the paramedics, the emergency room doctors and finally the neurologist; all of them had pointed to alcohol consumption as a trigger for his seizure. As usual my husband minimized the problem quick to point out that there were other things that could trigger a seizure, but he did say would make some changes concerning how and what he would drink.They say a fire burns brightest right before it extinguishes … [Read more...]

Millipede: Part 20

drinkingalone

by Millipede"Little Bit" "Little Bit" a voice cut through my phone conversation. I told my friend that I would call her back and hung up the phone.I had relished being absolutely lazy on Sunday mornings; sleeping in and than taking it easy. My friend had called just after I had gotten out of the shower and I hadn't had time to really talk to my husband. What,I wondered, could be wrong?I found him trying to put a leash on our pet Rottweiler. She was jumping about, making it difficult to get the leash hooked up. That was business as usual, what caught my attention was the tone of my husband's voice. It sounded like he was drunk! Again, he hollered at Little Bit and this time I … [Read more...]

Millipede: Part 19

straw

by MillipedeMy story continued; The Final Straw.Spring came and with it came another problem. After having been married so long, I figured that I had seen all of the "issues" that my husband had. The disregard for his health, the laziness, the ability to let his faults put us in dire circumstances. I thought I knew them all. Evidently not.Simply put, my husband had developed an alcohol problem.To backtrack, we had never been teetotalers. Even after having gotten involved in the Patriarchy movement, we never abstained from alcohol completely. While both churches had followed a lot of Fundamentalists doctrines, neither condemned alcohol use. In fact many of our church friends … [Read more...]

Jack Schaap: Villain or Victim?

jackschaap

Update on the ongoing scandal without the Independent Baptist Church in Hammond, Indiana.Seems that with every passing day there has been increasingly odd new stories coming out about the real reasons Jack Schaap has been asked to step down from his pastorate position at the First Baptist Church in Hammond, Indiana. Some of his supporters are trying to spin it as if he were the victim of a wicked, wily, horny teenage girl, that old 'blame the victim' mentality that hinges on modesty issues most of the time.But there were hints that Jack Schaap was not quite right before this incident came to light. Like the strange things that were said during his last sermon at First Baptist Church. … [Read more...]

An Open Letter to Ellie Ponder Woman

unmasking

by CaluluDear Ellie Ponder Woman– Listen Please!Several days ago I was directed to your blog by a friend and before I knew it I was drawn in. I read every entry, particularly those involving the struggles in your marriage with incidents of domestic violence. You stated that you wanted to glorify God through your postings, testify to His mercy, love, restoration and miracles. Which is fine because every blog author has their own central theme.I know from reading your comments and commenting policy page that any concerns I might post for you there will only be deleted and considered hateful attacks by the enemy. I'm not writing about this out of hate, but concern for another human b … [Read more...]

Updated Allegations Involving Jack Schaap

Many of us that have been following the Jack Schaap firing from First Baptist Church of Hammond, Indiana.  This morning brought the news of exactly why there was a law enforcement investigation into the circumstances that led to his dismissal. Not only had he cheated on his wife, breaking his marriage covenant with her but it seems that his choice of partner was a 16 year old girl, a mere child to his 54 years of age.Preying on the young, sick and disgusting.More at MSNBC.Comments open belowNLQ Recommended Reading ...'Breaking Their Will: Shedding Light on Religious Child Maltreatment' by Janet Heimlich ‘Quivering Daughters‘ by Hillary McFarland ‘Quiverfull: Inside the … [Read more...]

Who Was That Masked Man? Part 11

by CaluluI went home crying, shocked that my pastor had gone back on his word like that. It was a betrayal that left me reeling emotionally. Cried for days feeling a sense of deep betrayal. The pastor was quiet that week, no emails or phone calls.I told my husband that I thought the time was right for me to join him at the other church and that I had no intention of going back to the old church as a member ever again. He was the recipient that afternoon of quite a few emails from Tom Smith telling him that he was dicing with his very salvation by attending this main stream denomination filled with homosexual abortionists.Fast forward a week. Hubby and I both agree that the best … [Read more...]

Who Was That Masked Man: Part 10

by CaluluIt seemed like the conferences and teachings were helping Tom even if he was still having his moments of weirdness and dysfunction.And then my darling husband started skipping our church's Sunday School to attend the early service at a big mainstream denomination before coming for to our church for our service. The questions started. I didn't quite know how to answer them because I didn't quite know exactly what was going on in my husband's mind. I knew he was unhappy with our church and visiting the denomination he'd been raised in was comforting to him, like going to the Catholic Charismatic services were to me when I visited down home in Louisiana. But I didn't really … [Read more...]


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