Preparing To Be A Help Meet: The King Part 5

joffreybeating

by Mel cross posted from her blog When Cows and Kids CollideAh, yes.  The portion of the chapter where Debi poisons the well.  Oddly enough, she seems conflicted during this section.  Debi seems torn between toeing the party line about "Your husband is always right!" and admitting that mothers may know what is best - especially when mom is trying to extricate her daughter from an abusive husband."Mama Says He's a DudIf your father is a gentle, kind man, and if your mother has always been ... how shall we say it ... a little dominant, then what I am about to teach you might save your future marriage. " By crushing you.  And your mom.   … [Read more...]

CTBHHM: Finding a “Decent” Woman

The sad thing is that the Debis of this world would see this pretty floral skirt as 'immodest' because it shows the knees.

by Libby Anne cross posted from her blog Love, Joy, FeminismCreated To Be His Help Meet, pp. 199—201This week we start Debi’s chapter on being “chaste.” Remember, she’s going through the proscriptions in Titus 2: 4—5. Last week we finished her chapter on being “discreet.” Let’s get started! … [Read more...]

CTBHHM: Sex, Charles and Lesbians

questioning

by Libby Anne cross posted from her blog Love, Joy, FeminismCreated To Be His Help Meet, pp. 196This week we continue with Debi’s questions not to ask your husband.7. Do you ever think of just loving me in the spiritual way instead of always the carnal? I am so hungry for some deep spiritual understanding and communication. Something deep inside him is so dissatisfied, so frustrated that she responds intimately only when she feels right about it. It speaks nothing of his manhood. His soul is sick all the way to its core. He falls asleep fantasizing about the woman he met in the store today. God, help his filthy soul.Translation: If you tell you don’t sexually satisfy your hus … [Read more...]

Preparing To Be A Help Meet: The King Part 4

King Clovis I using the royal touch at his coronation to heal a man of scrofula.

by Mel cross posted from her blog When Cows and Kids Collide This is the second to last "King" post - and the last one that talks directly about the "King's" lunacy."Kings usually like fine meals served on time and in good order.  If you are an especially fine cook, your gifts will be greatly appreciated.  A Kingly Man is not one to help out in the kitchen."Translation: Your husband, who never lifts a finger, is free to complain about your crappy cooking, your failure to plate everything like a restaurant , and/or your inability to have dinner ready when HE wants it."Kings like to talk about their plans, ideas, and unfinished projects.  They will be very objective, very unem … [Read more...]

Preparing To Be A Help Meet: The King Part 3

queenjane

by Mel cross posted from her blog When Cows and Kids CollideSo much toxicity in FOUR paragraphs.   "A good King sees the bigger picture and strives to help the greatest number, even if it costs him his life and the lives of those he loves."  Remember in the Gospel where Jesus throws Peter in front of the guards who came to arrest him?  Or the time Jesus made it out of the temple after challenging the money-changers by blaming his brothers? Don't remember those?  Me either.  That's because Jesus NEVER sacrificed the lives of those he loved. Let's compare Debi's take with some quotes from the Catechism of the Catholic Church: … [Read more...]

CTBHHM: Men Can’t Take Criticism (Ever)

cryingman

by Libby Anne cross posted from her blog Love, Joy, FeminismCreated To Be His Help Meet, pp. 194—195This intro matter confuses me a bit.The Skinny Swine Lack of Judgement “Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands” (Proverbs 14:1).  “A wise woman doesn’t attempt to instruct her husband through feigned questions. Her questions will be sincere inquiries concerning his will.”  The skinny woman who inspired this next list of questions doubtless saw herself as a kind person, wonderful mother, and first-rate wife, yet she was tearing down her house one question at a time.I do not get the swine bit, or the skinny bit. Debi is about to la … [Read more...]

Preparing To Be A Help Meet: The King Part 2

Henry The VIII's queen Anne Boleyn discovered the hard way what happens when you disappoint the King.

by Mel cross posted from her blog When Cows and Kids CollideNow, Debi normalizes abusive relationships. "These types are known for expecting their wives to wait on them hand and foot.  A Kingly Man does not want his wife involved with any project that prevents her from serving him.  If you are blessed to win the favor of a strong, forceful, bossy man, then it is very important for you to learn how to serve with joy."What kind of sick blessing is that?   Waiting hand and foot on a tyrant isn't a blessing; it's a curse. "Kingly Men are not as intimate or vulnerable as other men in sharing their personal feelings with their wives.  They seem sufficient unto themselves.  It can leave a sen … [Read more...]

Preparing To Be A Help Meet: The King Part 1

The King - sort of like King Joffrey from "Game of Thrones"

by Mel cross posted from her blog When Cows and Kids CollideI hate this chapter.  All of it.  Hate.This deserves a trigger warning for abuse, abuse rationalization, and hideously bad grammar."Moral to the Story: The wife to a King must learn to serve him with honor.A Caution: Don't be offended by his lack of serving or helping you in the mundane things of life." Why shouldn't I be offended?  He's being an ass. "God the Father is dominant, sovereign, and in command.  He is the King of Kings.  He created a few men who are like him in this aspect; they are kingly men.  In my book Created To Be His Help Meet, I called them Command Men, because that is their most dominant feature. " The res … [Read more...]

CTBHHM: Debi Speaks on Ruth’s Sex Life (and a Stove)

stove

by Libby Anne cross posted from her blog Love, Joy, FeminismCreated To Be His Help Meet, pp. 192—194In this section we get a letter from a woman named Ruth, and Debi’s response to it. Remember that we are in the section on being “discreet,” so presumably this relates (somehow). … [Read more...]

Preparing To Be A Help Meet: Mel’s Interjection on Traits of Narcissists

narcissist

by Mel cross posted from her blog When Cows and Kids CollideI hate a few chapters of Debi's book.  The Kingly Man Chapter is one of them.  It's so incredibly toxic.  The whole chapter is essentially an apologia for narcissistic men and an instruction manual for how to be an enabler instead of a wife. To counter-balance some of the toxicity, I read the book "The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists" by Eleanor Payson. This book helped me clarify some of the traits in Michael Pearl that are unhealthy and also recognize Debi as a covert narcissist as well.  I'll be referring back to the book throughout the King Chapter, but also later in the book since I think we can determine some inter … [Read more...]


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