Peace in the Midst of the Storm

by Cindy Kunsman cross posted from her blog Under Much Grace  Please enjoy the reflections of Stephen Parsons as he visits the Island of Crete. (The post in its entirety struck me as so lovely and deep using a powerful analogy that I have not even noted here, it is well worth the visit to Surviving Church to read it.): … [Read more...]

What’s Your Motive? To Hurt? To Help? To Heal?

by Ellen cross posted from her blog When Church HurtsI haven’t yet publicly posted the last two parts of my story on this blog.  I’m checking my motive before I do that.  Because, while all the names have been changed and only one person that knows me personally is following this blog (and I suspect has shared it with church leadership), I want to be sure that when I post it publicly, it is not to hurt, but to help others to heal. … [Read more...]

Worthy of Repeating

by Cindy Kunsman cross posted from her blog Under Much GraceAll images by Cindy Kunsman and Under Much Grace used with permission. … [Read more...]

Faith, Feedback and False Consensus

by Cindy Kunsman cross posted from her blog Under Much GraceAll images by Cindy Kunsman from Under Much Grace and used with permission.Part of Cindy's series on CranioRectal Inversions Just a reminder that the purpose of this discussion aims at stimulating thought and self awareness as tools to help those in recovery from trauma learn how to make safer choices. To make the discussion more jocular, we've defined Cognitive Biases as “CranioRectal Inversions” (CRI). … [Read more...]

A CranioRectal Inversion as Both Nemesis and Insightful Tool

by Cindy Kunsman cross posted from her blog Under Much GraceAll images by Cindy Kunsman and Under Much Grace and used with permission Just a reminder that the purpose of this discussion aims at stimulating thought and self awareness as tools to help those in recovery from trauma learn how to make safer choices. To make the discussion more jocular, we've defined Cognitive Biases as “CranioRectal Inversions” (CRI).The False Consensus Bias refers to a tendency to overestimate the number of people who share our views, beliefs, values, and behaviors. I tend to think of Descartes' “I think therefore I am.” If I start with myself at the center of my understanding, it seems to naturally foll … [Read more...]

Benchmarking and the Secret Knowledge Bias of the Cult Leader

by Cindy Kunsman cross posted from her blog Under Much Grace.Part of her series on Cognitive Biases. All images by Cindy Kunsman of Under Much Grace and used with permission. ~~~~~~Just a reminder that the purpose of this discussion aims at stimulating thought and self awareness as tools to help those in recovery from trauma learn how to make safer choices. To make the discussion more jocular, we've defined Cognitive Biases as “CranioRectal Inversions” (CRI).I've struggled with writing this installment because I hate when a person pulls a Blind Spot Bias subtype out of their hat as cult leaders often do... Or were they in full force all along, but it took time for me to finally … [Read more...]

I Can’t Be Biased!

by Cindy Kunsman cross posted from her blog Under Much GraceAll images by Cindy Kunsman and Under Much Grace used with permission Just a reminder that the purpose of this discussion aims at stimulating thought and self awareness as tools to help those in recovery from trauma learn how to make safer choices. To make the discussion more jocular, we've defined Cognitive Biases as “CranioRectal Inversions” (CRI). … [Read more...]

Doing the Right Thing

by Ellen cross posted from her blog When Church Hurts“We must take sides.  Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim.  Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented.  Sometimes we must interfere.  When human . . . dignity is in jeopardy . . . sensitivities become irrelevant.  Wherever men and women are persecuted . . . that place must – at that moment – become the center of the universe.”  Elie Wiesel, The Night Trilogy: Night, Dawn, Day … [Read more...]

Cranio-Rectal Inversion and Cognitive Bias

by Cindy Kunsman cross posted from her blog Under Much GraceAll images by Cindy Kunsman from Under Much Grace and used with permission. (You can't live very safely if your head's up your _____.)The title of this post conveys a rude image, but I find it sadly and uncomfortably true. In pondering my own recent disappointments in life and establishing safety in trauma recovery, I found myself looking squarely at my own cognitive biases. And I realized that you can't see and hear if you've buried your head away somewhere, even if it is self interest. … [Read more...]

Falling Down

by Living Liminal cross posted from her blog Living LiminalI have to confess that I found myself reacting the other day to some words which had triggered me, and left me hearing repeated echoes of past abuse. I reacted. I struggled. I felt like I'd lost my footing and was flailing around trying to find my balance. "Not again," I thought, attempting to regain my equilibrium.And as I wrestled with that reality, I was dragged down by the weight of failure. After all, I'd experienced so much healing since I lived in that old head-space. What on earth was wrong with me!? … [Read more...]