Steadfast Daughters in a Quivering World ~ Part 3: Perception

[Note: this series is dedicated to Quivering Daughters by the former-Quiverfull moms at No Longer Quivering.] by Vyckie So what is "abuse" and who gets to define it? Steadfast Daughters devotes a considerable amount of time and mental energy to this question. The trouble with making definitions central to the discussion is this: there's no way to do it without being condescending, petty and dismissive of Quivering Daughters who are reporting their highly personal, and necessarily highly subjective experiences of emotional and spiritual abuse. There is no objective way of defining and quantifying "abuse" ~ no way. Sorry. Try it if you must ~ but you will lose. Too many factors affect our … [Read more...]

Dispelled ~ One Girl’s Journey in a Home School Cult ~ Part 6: Growing Pains

Please note: The content contained herein does not necessarily reflect the values and opinions of the NLQ blog and its administrators. by Chandra For the last six months, I dreamt of living in Texas and of being free. I knew that I didn’t know Gabe, but just the thought of getting out of the hell that I was currently in was all that I cared about. Everything else paled in comparison to the nightmare that I was living. My optimism still kept me going, and I was confident that even though I had been keeping an enormous secret from my parents, and that I didn’t know who this guy was, I would still find love and freedom. Two things I desperately wanted. I began to use the … [Read more...]

Steadfast Daughters in a Quivering World ~ Part 2: Expectations

[Note: this series is dedicated to Quivering Daughters by the former-Quiverfull moms at No Longer Quivering.] by Vyckie Proverbs 22:6 says: Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it. Damn ~ I really hate that verse. Let me tell you why. 1) It is from this proverb that we Quiverfull moms got the idea that through diligent training we could ensure our children would become mature Christians firmly grounded in the Lord and His word. Of course, we all know that God has no grandchildren ~ our sons and daughters must come to their own faith in Christ ~ still, there is a promise implied in Proverbs 22:6 which leads QF parents to believe that by … [Read more...]

Steadfast Daughters in a Quivering World ~ Part 1: Sincerity

[Note: this series is dedicated to Quivering Daughters by the former-Quiverfull moms at No Longer Quivering.] by Vyckie Stacey McDonald, author of "Raising Maidens of Virtue: A Study of Feminine Loveliness for Mothers and Daughters," has set up a new website devoted to responding to Hillary McFarland's "Quivering Daughters" book and website. As one who embraced the idea of trusting the Lord with my family planning and devoted myself to raising up polished "arrows" fit for the Lord's service ~ "Raising Maidens of Virtue" was a much-referenced book in my large collection of "biblical family" materials. I loved the title. The words "Feminine Loveliness" filled my imagination with visions of … [Read more...]

Adventures in Recovery ~ Sending Out An SOS

by Calulu A few days ago I got an SOS call from work. Rosie called with that most dire of all emergencies, they were out of toilet paper. Where's Mr. Whipple when you need him? Since we're an artsy bunch we're not the most practical and we tend to run out of things or have massive fail on things practical. During my fundamentalist years I used to beat myself up internally about my lack of domestic ability and interest. Now I realize I'm simply hard wired very differently than the perfect wives and housekeepers I knew at church. And that's okay. Took me a long time to realize it didn't matter a hill of beans to the universe if I was practical or impractical or if my living room was … [Read more...]

I Am So Much More Than a Maiden of Virtue! Part 3 ~ Biblical Chastisement

by WanderingOne At this point, I think it's necessary to write something about how things changed after my sister was born. It's hard to know what to say here—I do not want to tell my sister's story for her, nor could I presume to do so. But it would be disingenuous to attempt to write about my life without explaining how and why things changed. My little sister was, in so many ways, my opposite. Where I was shy, quiet, reserved and even timid, she was outgoing, bold, adventurous, and confident. I went to her Sunday School class rather than my own; I followed her lead in so many things, even though I was the older of the two of us. This didn't always work very well, given that I was … [Read more...]

Visionary daughters quiz

Over on the NLQ forum, we've all been taking Visionary Daughter's "Are You A Fool?" quiz ~ it's annoyingly hilarious ~ and I thought No Longer Quivering readers who aren't on the forum might like the chance to join in on the fun. Here's question #1: How do you respond when criticized/corrected? 1) I hate it! I get angry and defensive. 2) I usually laugh it off. (Sometimes I roll my eyes.) 3) If I get criticized for the same thing enough times, I usually start to take it seriously.. 4) I’m thankful for the smallest hint of reproof and take it very seriously. Take the Quiz!! What do you think? Post your comments below ~ or join the forum to participate in this and many other … [Read more...]

Adventures in Recovery ~ The Big Truth

by Calulu Midnight. I'm in my kerchief and the hubby is in his cap when from the lawn across the street there arose such a clatter.... Unfortunately for us it wasn't jolly old Saint Nick or even The Grinch with his little dog Max, it was merely our neighbors, the Bumpasses. Their name isn't really 'Bumpass' but after they moved in they proved by their behavior that they had to be related to the original Bumpasses in the movie, 'The Christmas Story' And yes, they have a pile of hound dogs that would gladly eat your turkey if they could get to it. The Bumpasses got along with no one in the neighborhood and now they were busy cementing their reputation as the neighborhood jerks by trying to … [Read more...]

Dispelled ~ One Girl’s Journey in a Home School Cult ~ Part 4 : The Darkness Sets In

Please note: The content contained herein does not necessarily reflect the values and opinions of the NLQ blog and its administrators. by Chandra The next morning was back to business as usual in our home. There would be no mention of my suicide attempt until I would bring it up, nearly ten years later. I knew waking that morning that Christ himself had pulled me through last night, even at fourteen. I didn’t know though, how I would get through the days and years ahead of me, that I had yet to live. Emotionally I was spent. Going through puberty was difficult enough, and even more difficult because that also was a topic off limits to discuss. Sexual “things” were just not … [Read more...]

I Am So Much More Than a Maiden of Virtue! Part 2 ~ Cousins

by WanderingOne When I was four years old my cousin Aaron was born to my mom's sister. The next year, my sister, and three other cousins were born on my mom's side. After that, every year, two or three or sometimes all four of my mom's sisters were pregnant.  By the time I was eight, I had thirteen cousins on that side of my family. When my sister and I were added in, that meant there were there were fifteen of us, and I was the only one not the age of five.   More often than not (we lived relatively near one another), my mother would take my sister and I over to one of her sisters' houses to do our schoolwork, or to help out with housework.  And we might not be the only cousins over … [Read more...]


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