Burqas Anyone?

burqas

by CaluluMy daughter and I had a very unexpected thing happen on Friday night. We were in a local fast food joint picking up dinner and ran afoul of a group. Laura had shown up unexpectedly along with her brother and his two best friends. I'd only cooked for my husband and myself so out the door it was to pick up take out.Now all the young adults wanted Chick Fil A, not my favorite place even before the Chick Fil A Appreciation Day but hey, the company weren't the ones sponsoring that day and I don't have the awesome super power to dictate my guests taste bud preferences.As we pulled into the restaurant parking lot I noticed that there was an older school bus painted some … [Read more...]

“Biblical” Parenting, Criticism #4: A Parent Who Isolates in Order to Control

by LatebloomerThis is part of a series of posts reviewing Reb Bradley's book "Child Training Tips". Read the introduction here. Read criticism #1 here. Read criticism #2 here. Read criticism #3 here.To briefly review, my first criticism of Reb Bradley's book "Child Training Tips" discussed the way his advice pushed parents toward the worst possible interpretation of their child's behavior at the expense of mercy and understanding.  My second criticism looked at the extreme level of control that parents are urged to have over their child's mind and body, which can prevent the child from maturing and can put the parent at risk of developing abusive habits.  My third criticism look … [Read more...]

News Links September 13, 2012

There really wasn't much this week that crossed my desktop to post here so today I'm going to be featuring links to some great pieces written by our members of The Spiritual Abuse Survivor Blogs Network.Libby Anne at Love, Joy, Feminism has a slew of interesting things she's blogged on this week - I recommend starting with "Navigating the Cultural Transition" - thoughts on leaving the religious culture for the world.Sierra at The Phoenix and Olive Branch invokes Dr. Who in discussing Nature and God - "Nature's God"KR Wordgazer at Wordgazer's Words has written more on male headship in the church and family - "Assumptions Make You-Not-Whats Out of You and Me"Cindy Foster at … [Read more...]

“Biblical” Parenting, Criticism #3: A Parent Who Tries to Change Minds and Hearts Through Spanking

by LatebloomerThis is part of a series of posts reviewing Reb Bradley's book "Child Training Tips". Read the introduction here. Read criticism #1 here. Read criticism #2 here.To briefly review, my first criticism of Reb Bradley's book "Child Training Tips" discussed the way his advice pushed parents toward the worst possible interpretation of their child's behavior at the expense of mercy and understanding.  My second criticism looked at the extreme level of control that parents are urged to have over their child's mind and body, which can prevent the child from maturing and can put the parent at risk of developing abusive habits.  Now here is my third criticism.Criticism #3: … [Read more...]

Before There Was Me: Part 4

by MariAnd Then There  Were TwoMy second brother, Andrew was born nearly two years after Jonathan.Today, I’d say my favorite part about Andy is that he’s daddy to a special little 2-year old girl and a precious 3-week old baby girl. And of course, husband to a wonderful lady.Another thing I love about him is that he knows everything there is to know about air conditioners. This came in very handy about a month ago when I was in the market for one.But that is today.Andy is a typical “middle child.” I could go into a lot of family dynamics about how this works, but I’ll spare you. It’s true that middle children seek outside relationships more than oldest or youngest ch … [Read more...]

Before There Was Me: Part 3

by MariThe HouseI’d like to take a moment to thank my parents for making my story an easy one to tell. I say “easy” because when they picked their nest, they stuck with it — and that has made dividing my life into chapters really simple. Well, at least for this particular part of the story!After my parents were married, they moved into the apartment building next door. The green one.But let’s not get ahead of the story.They called the nice little apartment home for almost a year after they married. They started their family there- and, they started house-hunting. Because when you’re young newlyweds with your first baby on the way, the thing to do is to find a permanent nes … [Read more...]

“Biblical” Parenting, Criticism #1: A Parent Who Assumes The Worst

by LatebloomerThe task of reviewing Reb Bradley's book "Child Training Tips" has been a lot more challenging than I expected.  First of all, where do I start when I disagree with almost every sentence that this book contains?  I can find almost no common ground on which to begin.  And how can I explain my reasons for disagreement when the very things that I see as horrifying are held up as admirable goals by the author?Because of these difficulties, I have decided that these posts will simply be a way for Present Me to explain to Past Me that this so-called "Biblical" parenting is damaging to individuals and relationships because it sacrifices all other virtues for the sake of au … [Read more...]

News Links September 5, 2012

Sometimes churches need to be reminded that if they campaign for a certain party or candidate they put their tax exempt status at risk - ChicoER - Editorial: Church runs afoul of rulesThere's an interesting article by Jenny Rae Armstrong over at Red Letter Christians about Patriarchy, Pop Culture, and PornograpyThoughts on handling a large family after leaving Quiverfull Patriarch world far behind. Recovering from Religion - When the Grass Looks Greener Elsewhere- Be Sure the Fertilizer Works in Your Yard!And for anyone that needs a reminder of poisonous and destructive Patriarchy and Quiverfull beliefs can be just one quick read through the Duggar-approved 7 Basic Needs of a … [Read more...]

“Biblical” Parenting: Introduction

by LatebloomerEvery once in a while, I realize something shockingly obvious, something that confronts yet another false assumption that has managed to cling to my mind even as I've moved further and further away from my fundamentalist Christian roots.In the whole Bible, there is not a single verse that credits parents for having raised a good child.  Nothing from God, nothing from any adult sons or daughters in the Bible.  Not one word of thanks, not one word of credit.It would be easy to insert a few parental credit verses into the Bible.  Maybe we could add a little phrase here or there in the Old Testament, such as "King David, because of his godly parents," or "Moses, thanks t … [Read more...]

Before There Was Me

Mari

by Mari(Editors note: Please join me in welcoming the newest member Mari of the Spiritual Abuse Survivor Blogs Network. Mari will be telling her story here starting with her mother. Thanks for joining us Mari!)My mom spent her childhood in south central North Dakota and north central South Dakota. I’m not clear on the details of her childhood, but I do know that they lived on at least two different properties in North Dakota, but she attended church and graduated from high school in the little town of Pollock, South Dakota.Pollock is a beautiful place. Not because of scenery or landscaping, but because the ideals, the mindset, and the sense of community are beautiful. It’s like go … [Read more...]


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