I just don’t like Above Rubies magazine

By Vyckie GarrisonMy bulk subscription to Above Rubies recently arrived in the mail. Even though I left my Quiverfull beliefs and lifestyle over five years ago, I never bothered to remove myself from Nancy Campbell's mailing list - so periodically, I still receive five copies of the magazine which claims to be "Strengthening Families Across The World."The lastest issue features a cover photo of Nancy's daughters, Pearl and Serene making their FAT STRIPPING FRAPPA (even though it's sweet, frothy, and creamy, it will strip off the pounds!  ... find the recipe in their new book, Trim Healthy Mama) and headlines to make a submissive Quiverfull wife drool:We Stopped Our D … [Read more...]

No Mamas Choice – Infertility

by CaluluWhat happens when Quiverfull moms get that Baby Fever and discover for unknown reasons that their wombs will not get with the program?It is one of the questions that pops up here from time to time -'What about women who are infertile, how does the doctrine of many 'blessings' preached by the Quiverfull Patriarch movement treat women who aren't able to bear children?'Past abortions are blamed frequently as a reason for infertility, the thinking being that you devalued life and the precious gift that the Lord gave you so He determined you are not worthy of the blessing. We know that some sources believe God punishes women who have had abortions by making them bear disabled … [Read more...]

Mama’s Choice – Part 4: Buying It Wholesale

by Vyckie GarrisonShortly after recognizing the spiritually abusive nature of the Quiverfull movement, I wrote:I’ve had a sick feeling in my stomach lately.  It’s the feeling that comes along with a growing realization that the Quiverfull worldview and lifestyle which I felt that I had carefully considered and thoughtfully adopted is, in actuality, a product called “biblical family values” which is being aggressively marketed as an investment to safeguard our loved ones from becoming collateral damage in today’s war against the family. …Seems that I should have been immune to the marketing strategies of those who ruthlessly engender fear and dissatisfaction so they can offer their … [Read more...]

Mama’s Choice – Part 1: For the Bible Tells Me So

by Vyckie Garrison Get out a concordance (or search online) and look up the words "contraception," "birth control," "condoms," "the pill," "natural family planning," "sterilization," … no results? That's because the bible does not directly address the topic of birth control.Do a Google search for "the bible and birth control," and you might be surprised to discover that even John Piper and company do not insist that the bible forbids married Christian couples to use birth control - choosing instead to emphasize biblical principles such as stewardship, prudence, reason, and the sovereignty of God while maintaining that children are indeed a blessing from the Lord.Sure you can find … [Read more...]

The Natural Use of a Woman: Jim Bob Duggar says, “It’s fun trying” for Baby #20

by Vyckie GarrisonDuring a recent interview on the Today Show, Jim Bob Duggar blurted out, "It's fun trying!" when asked if he and Michelle were actively seeking to have another baby.  Today's host, Savannah Guthrie responded to the mega-dad's salacious remark with, "Jim Bob - you sly dog!"Viewers may have come away with the impression that TLC's "19 & Counting" celebrity parents, Jim Bob & Michelle Duggar hold very casual, perhaps even avant-garde attitudes regarding sex and sexuality.But a quick look beneath the surface reveals that America's most celebrated Quiverfull couple believe and espouse decidedly unhealthy ideas when it comes to sex and babymaking.Although … [Read more...]

Why Quiverfull Moms Do Not and Cannot Love Their Bodies

This is a repost from 2009. An excellent piece written by Vyckie  that talks about how many QF moms think about their bodies after years of birthing. Worth revisiting now. Thanks Tapati for the reminder of what a powerful piece this is.by VyckieI beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service. (Romans 12:1)For the past week and a half, NLQ has been presenting the excellent material in Tapati’s Body Image Workshop.  As I’ve read through the posts and all the related comments on the NLQ forum, I’ve been thinking about how the Body Image issue is incredibly r … [Read more...]

Steadfast Daughters in a Quivering World ~ Part 4: Acknowledgement & Apologies

[Note: this series is dedicated to Quivering Daughters by the former-Quiverfull moms at No Longer Quivering.] In this part of our series, the ex-QF moms of NLQ are speaking directly to our own Quivering Daughters ~ though we've already said our apologies in person, we want to acknowledge the abuse we inflicted on our children publicly for their sake, though we're doing it anonymously out of respect for their privacy.Trigger warning: As painful it has been for us to write these confessions down ~ it may be even tougher for the Quivering Daughters who were on the receiving end of our neglect and abuse to read.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*My children were everything to me. I remember t … [Read more...]

Steadfast Daughters in a Quivering World ~ Part 3: Perception

[Note: this series is dedicated to Quivering Daughters by the former-Quiverfull moms at No Longer Quivering.] by VyckieSo what is "abuse" and who gets to define it? Steadfast Daughters devotes a considerable amount of time and mental energy to this question. The trouble with making definitions central to the discussion is this: there's no way to do it without being condescending, petty and dismissive of Quivering Daughters who are reporting their highly personal, and necessarily highly subjective experiences of emotional and spiritual abuse.There is no objective way of defining and quantifying "abuse" ~ no way. Sorry. Try it if you must ~ but you will lose.Too many factors affect our … [Read more...]

Steadfast Daughters in a Quivering World ~ Part 2: Expectations

[Note: this series is dedicated to Quivering Daughters by the former-Quiverfull moms at No Longer Quivering.] by VyckieProverbs 22:6 says: Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it.Damn ~ I really hate that verse. Let me tell you why.1) It is from this proverb that we Quiverfull moms got the idea that through diligent training we could ensure our children would become mature Christians firmly grounded in the Lord and His word. Of course, we all know that God has no grandchildren ~ our sons and daughters must come to their own faith in Christ ~ still, there is a promise implied in Proverbs 22:6 which leads QF parents to believe that by our in … [Read more...]

Created To Be His Help Meet ~ An Open Letter to Debi Pearl

by Africaturtle Dear Debi, It’s been a few years now since I read your book Created to be His Help Meet for the first time. I am married to a Mr. Command Man, as per your book’s description. My mom gave me your book for Christmas the first year I was married (six years ago now). She told me it was the best book she had read on the subject, and after reading it I was convinced it was too. (I had already read many other Christian books and periodicals on godly womanhood, including those of Mary Pride, Nancy Campbell, and a few from Vision Forum.) As a new wife and soon-to-be mother (I was pregnant within the first month after our wedding) I soaked up all of your stories and advice, expecting wh … [Read more...]