Millipede Part 32 How Did I Get Here? Part 3

howdidIget here

by MillipedeIn my case, the path started when I became involved in various "patriot" groups.Ironically, I was at first very careful to weed out the chauvinists and the misogynists. How women were viewed and treated was a make or break issue with me. My husband at the time was like most "average" guys meaning that he believed(or claimed to) gender equality to some degree. As in my previous experience, it was a mixed bag, some people were great, but sure enough we ran into a few rabid patriarchs. I remember one man, a preacher saying that women who were serving in the army ought to be ashamed of themselves and should instead, be at home changing diapers. Afterwords, my husband and I … [Read more...]

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Millipede Part 31 – How Did I Get Here Part 2

endoftheroad

by MillipedeThe path to Patriarchy is often a convoluted one. Embracing of Patriarchal beliefs is usually not the original intent, but is often the "byproduct" of one's attempt to embrace a particular religion and/ or ideology.This is important to remember, few women are quick to jump on a bandwagon which promotes a society in which women have few or no rights. However, finding themselves presented with a series of agreeable answers to various concerns will act as a compass which eventually leads the seeker to a particular brand of patriarchy.In more down to earth terms, proponents of patriarchy know they have a tough sell. After all, what woman in their right of mind is going to … [Read more...]

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No Mamas Choice – Infertility

empty womb

by CaluluWhat happens when Quiverfull moms get that Baby Fever and discover for unknown reasons that their wombs will not get with the program?It is one of the questions that pops up here from time to time -'What about women who are infertile, how does the doctrine of many 'blessings' preached by the Quiverfull Patriarch movement treat women who aren't able to bear children?'Past abortions are blamed frequently as a reason for infertility, the thinking being that you devalued life and the precious gift that the Lord gave you so He determined you are not worthy of the blessing. We know that some sources believe God punishes women who have had abortions by making them bear disabled … [Read more...]

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The (Polished) Lives of Others

by Broken DaughtersI remember dreaming about life the way I had seen it in those P/QF books and magazines and occasional home making blogs. It’s funny because it was never that way at our house. But I always thought that one day, I would live one of those beautiful lives.I’d have a pantry filled with homemade juices and marmalade and sauces and relishes. I’d have a beautiful, antique and yet modern kitchen. I’d have a great view from my kitchen windows, and I’d wear a beautiful apron. I’d be… hm. One of those fairytale housewives, I guess.My life would be quiet, relaxed. I’d be busy decorating a beautiful home, not really worrying about money and how to get by. My husband would be … [Read more...]

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Millipede Part 24 – The Breakup

shattered

by MillipedeThe next day I got up. As I showered and got dressed I thought of the previous night's events. I was tired, a bit worried, but mostly resolved. I was going to have a final talk with my husband; lay the cards on the table concerning our future.The discussion started as others had before with me sharing my concerns about my husband's drinking. Of course, my husband denied that he had a problem and our argument followed the trail. It was clear to me as we argued, that my husband was in his usual denial mode and I knew what that meant for the future. I couldn't not live under that sort of stress. It was time to act.I told my husband that if this was how he felt about the … [Read more...]

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Millipede Part 23

split

by MillipedeThe moment of truth came one Saturday night. No surprises there. Of course, my husband had decided to have something to drink. I abstained of course, someone would have to be ready to call 911. Even though the any possible seizure would not occur until the following day, a 400+ pound man could get into a lot of trouble if he fell of his chair during a nodding phase. Plus, who knows, this time the seizure might come earlier.Things were going well as expected. The slurring had started just a bit and my husband nodded off only once. off had. My husband mixed another drink which he said would be his last of the night.I watched with relief as he finished the cup. We had … [Read more...]

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Millipede Part 22

by MillipedeAmidst all the craziness with the alcohol, there was yet another worrying development which had crept up.As I mentioned before, my marriage had developed two fronts;one being my husband's self destructive propensities and the second which came later, that being his embrace of religious Patriarchy. The booze crisis came in with a flash, but that didn't mean that trouble wasn't brewing on the ol' Patriarchy front.Despite his new alcohol problem, my husband remained devoutly involved with the church. It was bitterly ironic and a testament to his hypocrisy, but it didn't stop my husband. In fact, I noticed the return of an old attitude, the one where he was lord over the … [Read more...]

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Millipede Part 17

steeple

by MillipedeThis time around it was different on the surface at least. My husband was trying a kinder and gentler approach to his faith. Rather than trying to make his wife follow behind him in the old Patriarchy Parade, my husband was content to go to church by himself. He did encourage me to go and on the infrequent occasions that I did, he would make a point of being considerate of me.Even so, I did not make plans to attend on a regular basis, even with my husband willing to leave when I was ready, it was usually about three in the afternoon when we left church. Given that it took over an hour to get there, the day was mostly over when we got home. Also, this pastor believed that … [Read more...]

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The God Card: Ask Your Husband

How to Figure Out What to Do With Your Life, In One Easy Step: Ask Your Husband The God Card ~ Thoughts on Patriarchal Teachingsby Journey  Guidance for a wife is a very simple matter.  It seems to boil down to just asking your husband.  We have to remember that it is the man, the husband, that God designated to be the head, the authority in the home.  --Genevieve M. White, in Daughters of Sarah, p. 59The woman who wants to be in control is a wife who is in rebellion towards God.  God does not look with favor on those who are rebellious towards Him…  The Bible says that "Rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft…"   …Webster’s 1828 calls witchcraft, "intercourse with the devil."  The con … [Read more...]

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