Daughter of the Patriarchy: Casualties

by SierraSoft breaths of cinnamon and vanilla wafted down into the basement from Anna’s kitchen. Laughter chorused over our heads as Sven and I busily fortified our Lego castle with rubber animals: his were the dogs, mine the cats. We worked together to fend off a motley invasion of snakes, hyenas and whatever other ugly miscreants we could dig from the toy bin. Pirates were only ever united by a common love of money. Bare light bulbs hung glaring over our heads, but we ignored them. Tiring of the siege, we took refuge under the stairs and ripped open a bag of butter cookies. Chessmen. We spared no cavalry or foot soldier in the cookie massacre. We were eight years old.Sneaking upstairs t … [Read more...]

Daughter of the Patriarchy: Hairspray

by SierraI awoke with my lungs filled with something pungent and sticky. I sat up groggily in the upper bunk, fumbling around for a watch or cell phone to tell me why it was still dark when so many beds were vacated. A light shone dimly across the long dorm room through a hazy moisture hanging in the air. My hand closed around someone’s small alarm clock, and I squinted at it. 5:30am.It was hairspray, I discovered as I staggered toward the bathroom. Lithe, elegantly dressed young women gathered cheerfully around the bathroom mirrors as they unrolled golden-flecked curls that fell gently to their thighs. Each strip of hair, carefully unbound from a foam roller, was sprayed within an inch o … [Read more...]

More Catholic Than The Pope: I could be good for him if he would love me and care for me

by MusicMomWhile my mother happily explored feminism and piled all of her frustrated hopes and dreams into my older sister, Aprille, I found myself in the new and different position of being my father's confidant and friend. My mother's transition from traditional womanhood into modern feminist had sent many ripples through our family life, and one of them bumped right into my traditional, conservative and passive father. Used to being deferred and catered to, his wife was now out protesting the need for bike paths and going to school for journalism.My mother and sister were very close – Aprille was her wonder girl – very intelligent, ambitious and empowered by mom to achieve eve … [Read more...]

More Catholic Than The Pope: Feminism became my enemy of choice and I vowed to aim my life’s energy at its destruction

by MusicMomI was born in the midst of the flower children and hippie ferver – 1967.  More importantly, for where I ended up in my life, I was born a few years after Betty Friedan wrote “The Feminine Mystique” which raised the consciousness of millions of educated American housewives as to what was exactly that nagging “problem with no name”. My mother was a rich, educated southern belle.  She graduated from Sweet Briar College in Virginia (yes, that actually is a women's college, not a fairy-tale castle) in 1960 and married the son of a NY judge, my dad.  They moved to NY and began the early-60's version of the American dream.  Dad got a job as a stockbroker and mom stayed home to … [Read more...]

Daughter of the Patriarchy: “Hello, Miss Dog-Meat.”

by SierraEvery so often, a story circulated around Message churches. Our pastor related it with a twinkle of humour in his eye. The precociousness of little children was always a failsafe source of amusement in a world that afforded so many sinful entertainments. Children quoting scripture were even better. Out of the mouths of babes, it was oft repeated, the Word of God was made perfect. And so, it was with paroxysms of mirth that the following anecdote was passed around.One day, a minister’s wife was out doing the grocery shopping with her family. Her youngest boy, then only four or five, spied a worldly woman in the supermarket. With frank and immediate assurance, he called out, “ … [Read more...]

People Magazine: Duggars "won't rule out having baby #20"

Why Michelle Duggar can't say, "We're done!"  "We'll just wait and see what God has in store." ~ Michelle Duggar, People, Feb. 8, 2010by Vyckie As a former Quiverfull mom of seven, I've had such a variety of birth experiences ~ emergency c-sections, scheduled repeat c-sections, failed homebirth attempt, successful homebirth (after four cesareans!), hospital VBAC, and with my last birth ~ which I had planned to have unassisted at home, I ended up with a 5th c-section due to partial uterine rupture. My complicated birthing history made living out the Quiverfull ideal of "leaving my fertility in the Lord's hands" all the more challenging ~ and one of the toughest things for me to handle … [Read more...]

Barren

by CaluluOf all the things that happened during my ten years in the Quiverful movement I think that the one thing that caused me the most pain was my inability to bear children. Being infertile in a movement based upon the notion that God grants the righteous a full quiver of arrows led to all sorts of interesting assumptions by people that swore I was their Sister in Christ.Based upon the ways I was treated because of my fertility challenges I came to realize that my church ‘family’ was as dysfunction and rude as any family featured on a sleazy television talk show.I’d been an only child, growing up in a large home in south Louisiana.  My parents had an arranged marriage, which wasn’ … [Read more...]

Quiverfull Reality Pics …

by VyckieI was just digging around for old photos to post along with the next installment of my story.  Found this one of the children visiting me in the hospital after Wesley's birth ~ and thought to myself, "Hmmm ... what does this remind me of?"Oh ~ I know ... … [Read more...]

Daughter of the Patriarchy: Scooby Doo and the Angel

by SierraBy my eighth birthday, Anna’s church had become our own. My father attended sporadically, but my mother and I adopted a weekly ritual of driving forty minutes through the woods, to the highway, passing numerous small churches on our way to the secret annex of the YMCA. No one would have guessed there was a church there, unless they happened by as we all bustled in with our flowing skirts and dresses and exited under the mid-afternoon sun. My mother was enthralled, talking excitedly to Anna and her new friend Sheila every day. A frequent topic of conversation was her journal, in which she recorded her thoughts and prayers as well as verses from the Bible that seemed to answer e … [Read more...]

Quiverfull in a Nutshell

Michelle says, Never enough babies!What the quiverfull movement doesn't have is satisfaction. It casts itself as only looking for "blessing" but in many cases it seems to go far beyond that to reach the collectors' mentality which bespeaks more of greed, grabbing for every child you can, and if you don't do that, you fail spiritually. It's an insidious teaching and my only regret in accepting my atheism is knowing that there will be no ultimate reckoning where those who promoted and gained from this teaching do not face what they have created and see it for what it really is. The quiverful movement claims to welcome every child, but it never allows you to be happy with just what you have … [Read more...]


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